Why do some guys start to give you more attention when you start to ignore them?

Question

I started to be busier which makes me less available for my friends with benefits. Now he’s texting more often, it’s not the first time that it happens. I always wondered why this happens?

D_Bone_Steak · Accepted Answer

A lot of females don't understand this... they think more attention given equals more attention got most of the time to the point of making the guy ignore her. But in reality pulling back a little on the attention giving makes a guy try to fix it with attention giving... if that makes sense.

The guy simply has a certain level or amount of attention exchange with you (that probably also equals sex) that he wants to maintain. He notices the level of attention at your end is evaporating and he starts to overcompensate his role in the attention department... he might even be thinking you're mad at him or something.

Pretty simple right?

razelove · Accepted Answer

It happens with men and women. I've noticed the relationships that I'm willing to let go of are the ones that stay strongest, where the more that I put myself out there, the less I get out of it.

That seems like the ideal meeting in the middle, you're keeping some tension, and kind of both chasing each other, but keeping yourself primarily in the "chased" position. In the end it depends on what you want to get out of it, though I fail to see the downsides to having someone more attentive and available.

Account · Accepted Answer

Everyone worships the unavailable/whatever is perceived as difficult. For some reason it gives the illusion of someone having increased value. It applies on both genders and it is an ugly fact.

Simslover92 · Accepted Answer

I wonder the same thing. When I'm focused on him and trying to be more present in his life, he pushes me away but once I start to do my own thing, he comes back full throttle.

oldpigg · Answer

It is a manipulation technique, it was popularized by Neil Strauss, first you love bomb someone, and then suddenly you take that love away, which will generate something similar to withdrawal syndrome, which will make that person seek to regain the attention they had before.

Unit1 · Answer

I have no idea. I'm not like that at all, so i can't say. In fact if a girl ignores me, i assume its her lack of interest (obviously) and i move on

DanTheMan010 · Answer

I think what happens is the guy has an anxious attachment style and when you are busy they feel they are losing you so they push to talk more to reaffirm that your bond is strong and they don’t need to worry. In other words they are insecure about the relationship’s stability

blueonblack22 · Answer

It’s human nature to wonder what’s going on with this. It’s a scarcity complex. This definitely goes both ways. I’ve noticed when I am more mysterious and/or unavailable I always get more attention from women.

MoonFace2 · Answer

either you’re being more your confident self, which guys find sexy, or they later realise that they can’t do better with someone else.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

Assuming your evaluation of the situation is impartial then it can be an intended or unintended form of manipulation, if not, then it can be just the manifestation of miss?

Anonymous · Answer

Because you should know people who have friends with benefits are desperate for sex…. So they are addicted so they crave more. You should stop letting weird men sleep with you and it would solve so many of your problems

DtMe89 · Answer

The same reason women like men who are taken. We like the things, we can not have

Loki97 · Answer

It’s the same with women. People want what they can’t have

Tonita91996 · Answer

Because he only wants you for sex it a game that men like to play to see if they can get you to drop your guards.

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

I'm handsome enough that I don't give a woman who ignores me the first, let alone second glance.

Anonymous · Answer

For the same reason women start to give you more attention when you ignore them.

goodnightgrace · Answer

Cause humans naturally want what they can't have

WhitneySnow · Answer

They don’t like being ignored

Massageman · Answer

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

HДLILБΞУ · Answer

Some men are like that..

Landofifireandice · Answer

They probably are bored

Why do some guys start to give you more attention when you start to ignore them?

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