If you were dating to find a long term relationship what would you want to know before deciding to be official with a potential partner?

[Anonymous]

As far as I can tell things are going good and I am comfortable with the idea of a potential future with this woman, and since she's now said "at some point we're going to accidentally skip several levels because my family is at my house all the time", I can say with some level of certainty that she's considering the relationship seriously.

I would however like to make sure we've talked about all of the important things before we go all in. So, if you started dating someone and have already discussed that in about 3-5 years you both want to have children and are looking for something long term, what sort of things would you want to know before becoming "official" with someone?

[Anonymous]

I’d need to know their expectations and if it’s aligned with mine (if not we have to come to a compromise), I’d wanna know their relationship with their ex (if they’re still talking, hanging out etc), I also want to know their conflict resolution style

[Jamie05rhs]

"she's considering the relationship seriously.". WRONG. She's naive and immature. She doesn't know what the f she's doing. Stealing "bases" isn't going to advance your relationship to any higher levels in any way. The only thing that will change is your level of physical contact.


I would be wary of this girl if I were you. I think you should challenge her mentally to see how serious she really is. Because the mental and emotional part is where the rubber really meets the road.

[Jamie05rhs]

Thanks for the MHO.

[Guy13]

Two medical exams (physicals) that include blood and urine work exchanged. I’ve not had sex with people because they refuse to do it. I don’t just have sex… At least 6 months before it becomes a consideration for me…

[Asker]

... wut

[Guy13]

What I want to know was your question. Basic physical Medical history. If I’m dating a woman and she’s not concerned with that then she’s likely not my kind of woman…

[Asker]

Yeah but 6 months? I'm all good with an std test but 6 months? That's a long time to be constantly aroused.

[Guy13]

If she can’t keep her vagina concealed and carried for 6 months then no way 60 years…. That’s the point…sneak around…. go find another 🍆 …better now than later.

[Jamie05rhs]

@Guy13 What do you mean, "sneak around"?

[Guy13]

@Jamie05rhs if she is celibate for 6months and has to sneak around then thank God you know now than later. If either you or her can’t keep IT in holding cell then it’s probably a good idea to not be together🤷🏻‍♂️

[Jamie05rhs]

Ahh. Hmm. Interesting point.

[Asker]

@Jamie05rhs See I just personally can't do the celibate thing, why would I punish myself like that for the off chance that withholding affection manipulates her into doing something?

[Jamie05rhs]

Lol. It's not about manipulation, dude. If you think that's what it's about, then you're doing it wrong.

[Asker]

@Jamie05rhs Refusing to have sex with someone you want to have sex with who also wants to have sex with you, for a period of half a year, just cause.

[Jamie05rhs]

It's not manipulation. It's being cautious.

[LazerBean]

Literally everything.