Will you demand your girlfriend, boyfriend or spouse get rid of their opposite gender friends once you enter a relationship with them?

Question

And how you would react if your new man or woman tells you to ditch your opposite gender friends?

APrettyLittleLady87 · Accepted Answer

This is due the failure that the person not tolerating opposite sex friends is. A loser basically.

.

As example statistical fact, so much so it's part of psychology schooling if going into relationships/marriage counseling... cheaters accuse their spouse of cheating.

So someone who constantly cheats wouldn't want their partner to have opposite sex friends (because the cheaters brain will see such as opportunity)... though the partner may never cheat.

A friend of mine had a wife like this. When I learned of the entire story - how she wouldn't let him have female friends but that she cheated, etc - I bluntly told him I better not run into her cause my inital greeting would be a punch to the face and as ex military I might just break her nose (wasn't just the cheating, she was a nasty bitch).

.

Similarly someone unused to an ethic group may not be allowed to have opposite sex friends so as to not learn the boyfriends or girlfriends behavior is uncouth.

In college a girl used to go out with a guy from Jamaica that beat her. She told us it was "typical" in Jamaica and basically what to expect from someone from there.

Let's just say when boyfriend ended up in jail and she met other Jamaicans at the campus she got the wakeup call of her life

Seinna · Accepted Answer

If I see nothing suspicious or unhealthy about those friendships then of course I wouldn't demand it. If I had a reason to be doubtful then I'd address it with him and not engage further if I couldn't trust him.

I'd judge every such situation on a case by case basis but in general I'm not paranoid or suspicious of my partners' friends until they give me a reason to be.

If most of his friends were female I'd see it as a red flag though.

Similarly if a guy expect it from me, I'd assess the situation to see if he has legitimate reasons for concern (he doesn't, I only have one male friend whom I see occasionally) and ditch the one whom I'd view as being the toxic party.

I had some toxic friends in the past so I know it's possible and we often don't realise it for a time. On the other hand there are also toxic, manipulative guys who could try to separate me from friends to make me depend on them and be easier to control.

SlangSlayer · Accepted Answer

I'm not insecure. And you don't own these other people.
If they wanna cheat they gonna cheat.
I don't have time control your movement every day.

I work too much and I wanna relax when I get home.. i not trying to micro-manage.

If incatch you cheating it's over. I value my self over anybody else and gave you the freedom and yius till chose to play me

Wubs3000 · Accepted Answer

I have trust and my partner is pan anyways so they would have to have no friends in that case. I believe people can be friends regardless of gender. If a guy had a crush on them and they stayed friends that would be fine, as long as he isn't chasing after knowing they are taken and my partner isn't leading them on at all.

Aerissa_Jade · Answer

If he tells me to get rid of them, I get rid of him... cause I've been down that road before, he is trying to isolate me from friends to control me.

Never going to happen again.

I won't care if he has friends of the opposite gender either.

kylee2437 · Answer

No because that’s not how it works. When you are in the talking stage with someone that is your time to be observant and see if their life is compatible to yours which includes their friends. If their friends aren’t compatible to your beliefs, then you shouldn’t consider dating them. It is unfair to want to change someone because you were too selfish to find a partner that fits your standards instead

Little_Bumblebee · Answer

No, that's crazy. They are allowed to have friends of the opposite sex. As long as there isn't anything between them or they used to date or something like that.

I have guy friends too, and if a future partner tells me to lose those friends, I will break up with him.

MTC29 · Answer

No way. I moved from California to central Florida in 2017, but my SO was born and raised here.

She has numerous male friends, including the tax collector in the neighboring county. I'm in no position to make her give up her friends- male or female and I would never try.

JDBSLAOQ · Answer

If my partner thinks i can't have other male friends without fucking them, all that tells me is that THEY can't have female friends without fucking them. there's nothing wrong with having friends lmao

Sparkie460 · Answer

There's nothing wrong with having opposite sex friends. My wife has friends who are guys and I have friends who are women. They have been our friends since way before marriage. The only time a person would demand that is when they don't trust their partner.

RagnarRedbeard · Answer

Demanding that someone completely cuts off their friends is wrong. At the same time I’m not interested in a girl who has a lot of male friends or whose friends are mostly men, so I won’t take her seriously in the first place.

NathanDavis · Answer

no, because I am not an immature and insecure douchebag... and if someone asked me to do this then she doesn't know me at all, so we would not be apt for a relationship with one another... lol

h3llfireclub · Answer

I wouldn't date someone who doesn't believe men and women can't be friends. Not only would that mean he is jealous, but it would also mean he only sees women as potential partners.

Keyboardkat · Answer

Who are you to control her whole life? She's your girlfriend, not your slave! If you love her, you have to trust her. If you don't feel you can trust her, why is she your girlfriend? But, my friend, you don't OWN anybody!

Kori1236 · Answer

Why would I expect something I’m not willing to do myself? Seems like someone who demands that of their SO is insecure as all hell and should look into therapy to fix that; they are not relationship material

Smoke-n-Growls · Answer

Not only will I tolerate opposite gender friends, I encourage it. It isn't healthy to bar a partner from associating with whole ass genders because of your insecurities.

EmmaMary · Answer

Personally I would never, ever enter into any relationship whatsoever with such ridiculous and pathetic rules. Period.

Anonymous · Answer

"that the male friend secretly desire to have sex with her. LOL" All men will want sex with her if she's good looking.  Life is a gamble. If you can't take the heat, then stay out of the kitchen.

Kacey811980 · Answer

@hispanic-cool-guy no I wouldn't that is just silly. but I would demand the same consideration for me in return.

Subarugirl · Answer

Its not about tolerating anything. Your significant other is an individual and can have friends. If you don't trust them enough to be faithful or their judgment than that's a you problem and you probably shouldn't be with them.

HippieVeganJewslim · Answer

My love Noura says that She’ll tolerate my girlfriends. She won’t date other boyfriends. Therefore, why should I stop Her from having other friends that are men, if most people can differentiate between romance and platonic relationships? Should Harry Potter stop being friends with Hermione Granger, since He’s married to Ginny Weasley? When I marry Noura, should I stop being friends with my Flower Girl, Who calls me Her brother? I’ve known Her for a longer time than Noura.

QuietVerbena · Answer

No. That wouldn’t bother me. My guy friends are just friends and I expect his female friends to be too.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

I did when I found out how unhealthy the situation was. He couldn’t see the messed up till after some time without being her “friend”

Ez-Bri-Z_v2 · Answer

No because I'm not insecure enough to think they can't have friends of the opposite sex. My wife has lots of male and female friends (in case me being gay is used against me here) and not once did I feel like I needed to be worried about them.

Phoenix98 · Answer

Nope I don’t care if she has friends of the opposite sex. And no I wouldn’t get rid of any female friends I had.

UniquelyBasic · Answer

Depends if they have like all opposite gender friends. I probably would just avoid her anyways and not get into a relationship with them.

AviatorTom · Answer

In a relationship, one doesn't DEMAND anything. It's a partnership, and had nothing to do with tolerating friends. She has her friends, I have mine, and that's perfectly okay to continue friendships.

MikeInHawaii · Answer

I’ve lost a lot of female friends to marriage. I’ve even grown more distant from male friends whose wives think I’m a bad influence (usually a laughable idea).

AimeeKyle · Answer

That would be a disrespectful / inappropriate request…. You would have to be a very insecure individual to make a request like that…. or not trust your significant other

Chaser3232 · Answer

I would tolerate, with the understanding that if lines are crossed, that’s ground for automatic dismissal. No questions asked, no asking for forgiveness, same for me!

Alwayreckles93 · Answer

As long as they aren't younger woman I don't mind.

Guy13 · Answer

It will be encouraged since there is natural attraction there or they would not be friends

Stoner710 · Answer

Idc if my girl has guy friends it seems like control to make them not have guy friends

AsaKyo · Answer

No? Wtf kind of manipulative shit is that? lmaoo I wouldn't care as long as he wasn't fucking them behind my back or anything

Bubbles16 · Answer

What no I would never tell my boyfriend to stop being friends with other females because my best friend is a guy and he's fine with that

007kingifrit · Answer

demand? that would never work, but i would expect that naturally they wouldn't hang around with them alone and we would move away from them eventually

Anonymous · Answer

No, but if they allow their friends to undermine our relationship, something is going to happen. I'm not playing that game.

JustinTheGreat · Answer

Nah I’m not an insecure 15 year old lol  plus my husband is bisexual and by that logic that means I wouldn’t allow him to have friends at all, which is bit ridiculous lol

KrakenAttackin · Answer

I will have definite conditions such as no meeting that lesson unless I am present and no private communication with this person.

TheFlak38 · Answer

if she has guy "friends" then I dont have a girlfriend

Sour-rose · Answer

No, I be no longer sour, I just be... bitter and hateful.

LazerBean · Answer

No. And besides we have all the same friends.

pinkybabe · Answer

I won't tell my boyfriend to get rid of he's female friends never

Drumlin2001 · Answer

Nope. But most of her male friends are married or gay

Anonymous · Answer

LOL they are entering a relationship not joining a cult chillax

Nikki1989 · Answer

I would never do that.

fonduegirl · Answer

I'm not insecure. So probably not.

exitseven · Answer

As long as she never had sex or dated any of them.

scamstress · Answer

Grudgingly tolerate while being extremely suspicious

Blackcosmo · Answer

No I won't.

nawtee_me · Answer

damn the trust issues on here...

Luopio27 · Answer

Hell no.

Charliefretz329 · Answer

Hell no

Will you demand your girlfriend, boyfriend or spouse get rid of their opposite gender friends once you enter a relationship with them?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Once in a relationship, would you let your partner have new friends of the opposite sex?

Will you demand your girlfriend, boyfriend or spouse get rid of their opposite gender friends once you enter a relationship with them?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Once in a relationship, would you let your partner have new friends of the opposite sex?

We're glad to see you liked this post.