Should people with low self esteem be in a relationship?

[Reesi]

Should they work on themselves first b4 getting into one or rely on their partner to build them up

[caring__1]

No one is born with low self-esteem. It is something planted in us by parents and society... in their attempt at molding us into their perception of ideal. People who are indoctrinated to conform will never have quality self-esteem, as no one can ever measure up to the ideal.

Hopefully, working on oneself is a priority, but being in a relationship also gives us an opportunity to work on ourselves. If we just work alone, we're measuring our progress by the picture in our own head, whereas, when we can see the actual results of our choices, including how they impact others, our growth can be quicker and more effective.

Relying on a partner to build you up will always backfire. The more dependent we are on external validation, the more we question our own ability to validate ourselves. Nothing handed to us on a silver platter will ever endure. The only way to improve self-esteem is to challenge oneself and gain a sense of accomplishment. Each accomplishment builds on the foundation of previous accomplishments.

[Ευδεμονια]

I speak as a person with low self esteem for some extent, like relationships and approach. I don’t have issues with my self esteem for work or study, I know my limits and I feel confident about the things I can do, but as regards relationships I think I need to work on myself. But self improvement can’t be obtained only by self work but through putting myself in uncomfortable situations, like relationships… so an introvert with low self esteem would never improve if he stays alone, he can improve only by working on himself while having a relationship.
For my personal experience, I though I could improve and become strong by myself so isolated myself for 10 years from a bad rejection I had, but this didn’t help me, on contrary, it became a burden, because now I’m inexperienced and I think I missed something for a good part of my life.

[Chazmatazz269]

Nobody can build up someone else’s self esteem for them. That’s work one must do for themselves. It’s better to do it while single, but i suppose an intelligent and highly self aware person could do it within the confines of a relationship.

[ArtemisSilver]

Why not both. You shouldn't isolate yourself while you work on yourself.

[Deku2009]

Yeah with people that can help them / handle them.

[melanieeeB]

You should always work on your low self esteem

[Zolly99999]

It really depends on the person.