Would you still stay with someone if they discovered they were trans after you started being in a serious relationship?

[emoboishorts]

just broke up with my boyfriend of two years because he just "couldn't be gay". I'm a trans boy and he just couldn't handle it anymore.

Updates

+1 y

to clarify... i didn't know I was trans until a year into the relationship, i held nothing back from him.

Updates

+1 y

And I still have all the “lady parts”

[PrettyPriya]

Wouldn’t that be something that would have been discussed once the relationship was serious? Personally, once I am at the point that I would consider it serious, meaning there is a chance at a future, something like that should be or would have already been brought up.

I would view someone not being upfront and honest about something as important as that disrespectful and not someone that I could date. What else are they hiding that is major?

The issue is trust and honesty is a huge component of a relationship. With those, along with many other things that are important, like communication, the relationship is doomed to fail.

I look at not being honest about something like that a failure and breach of my trust. So, I don’t think I could stay with someone that couldn’t feel like they could share important details of who they are. I’d constantly wonder what else I don’t know about.

[emoboishorts]

i didn't know i was trans when the relationship became serious

[emoboishorts]

i still thought i was a cis-girl, and then a year of being together, i discovered i am a trans boy (just not done any hormone stuff yet)

[PrettyPriya]

Okay, so you seem confused about who/what you are. Or at least you were confused at the time.

Likely you should have sorted that out prior to getting into a relationship. I’m sure your confusion was equal to that of your partner, who had no clue what to think, right?

That can be hard for a person to be in a relationship with someone so confused about who they want to be. Perhaps that is why the breakup.

You also can’t force or expect someone to take on a new sexuality because you changed yours, agreed? That is an expectation that is absurd. He didn’t want to be gay and that is his fault? You see how that looks, right? “He just couldn’t be gay” is what you said.

Are you suggesting he should have changed his sexuality for you? Unless I am missing something then I can see why this relationship failed.

[emoboishorts]

Ok. You are really fixated on it being someone’s fault. Yes, I’d hoped he would still want to be with me even after realizing I want to be a boy.

I was hoping they’d still love me the same way. So, I’ll try not to fault him for his orientation

[Faith18letsgo]

Yes, but I think it’s different for me because while I’m a lesbian I enjoy being sexual with men. So my sexuality wouldn’t prohibit me from staying intimate with this person. I’m sorry about your ex though, that’s a big bummer.

[Anonymous]

Don't be silly, you're still a girl and you'll always be a girl

[Iron_Man]

You got to be kidding me Hell no they’re a man

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Of course I would, but I'm panamorous anyway. More importantly, I would like to think that if I were with them then I'd be in love with the person regardless of how they identify.

[Twalli]

If she has lady parts, she's female.

[Avicenna]

Hell no