Is it unhealthy to want a partner who’s obsessed with you?

[Anonymous]

Just to be clear I do not want a stalker, someone dangerous, or insecure. I want someone who thinks about me 24/7 (exaggeration) and would do anything for me. Of course this would be mutual but anything other than someone who prioritizes me other 99% of other things (aside from self preservation and family) just makes me feel like he wouldn’t really love me. I want him to feel lovesick and have an unimaginable amount of love for me. Is this wrong and how do you even make a connection like that?

[Amy10223]

Well, it may be what you want, but it may be unrealisatic in the sense that people do have lives outside of thewirlove interests; they have their jobs and proferssions to adhere to, family members to tend to at times, parents who may be sickly, friends who may need them for a day, etc. etc. So what you may be setting up for yourself inn wanting them to think of you all the time with love on their minds, is a bit unrealistic and honestly, almost selfish when you think about it. I would not enjoy the fact that this person would live his entire life around me, and also I don't like being smothered in relationships, but that's just me. I feel that love should not be about living in each other's shadow, but rather growing separately while still loving one another, and not in each other's shadow.

[atiquahbby]

There is actually a fine line between love and obsession- love can turn into obsession.

Being in love with someone means you care for them, think of them and love them to bits. However you recognize that the other person is still another individual who needs his/her own space.

Being obsessed is when you do all those things, but become possessive and think the other person is your property. This means he/her doesn't have their own space or their own freedom and would start feeling like they want to escape. That is what obsession is, and no, this is not pretty.

Once you start noticing someone's love is getting to a point of making you feel like you want to escape this and be released, that is obsession.

So if you can somehow find someone with all those qualities, but still thinks of you as another person, and not just an object of their desires who doesn't need their own space, it will be fine. But this is highly unlikely.

[JosyJosy]

Very unhealthy... I would call that kind of person a stalker. He still has family, friends, his work, hobbies, his life to live, and anything... yeah pretty unhealthy.

[In_Trance]

Yeah