When to break up?

[Anonymous]

I'm in a long distance relationship with a guy. He's introvert and not proactive generally in his life. He's few years older than me and very understanding whenever we encounter problems. We always communicate our concerns at each other but sometimes I do feel the need to hide some because I don't want to pressure him or anything. But this time, I just got so tired of communicating my concerns. He would not do something unless I say so. Our dates, I'm the one who plans it all and at the end I will hear him complaining. The good thing about him is that even though he's not proactive but when I voice out my concern, he will try his best to change. But until when can I do this? I'm tired of daydreaming of having a relationship just like what normal couples have. I would ever so happy if he would initiate do something for me and for the relationship without me telling him to do so.

[kylee2437]

Him being introverted has nothing to do with him not listening to your concerns to help you be happy with the relationship. It’s him simply not caring because he’s comfortable with how the relationship has been going. If you aren’t happy with him and you have talked to him already, chances are he’s not going to change and you are going to have to possibly break up with him to find someone that gives you what you are looking for. This is coming from an introvert. When I like someone and I am comfortable with them, I am going to listen to their needs

[Asker]

Thank you for the insight. i just wanna ask further, isn't it possible for him to be initiative — to make the first move?

[kylee2437]

@asker if you were planning things from the very beginning meanwhile he was always following the plans you made -chances are he isn’t going to change because he is used to you always making the plans. It should’ve been a boundary you discussed from the beginning. If it bothers you badly, you need to find someone else.

[dustybiker]

It sounds like your hanging on hoping he’s going to change to something you want. He won’t. Men are often like an island (no offense men) but it you don’t bring it, you won’t find it or create it. Men are who they are.

[dustybiker]

*you’re

[Asker]

Thank you for the insight. But that's not what I wanted to do. If anything, I want him to take the initiative. That's all I ask for. Honestly, if I did not do something we will never have our first date.

[dustybiker]

That sounds exhausting.

[Iron_Man]

If you’re dating in person how is that a long distance relationship

[Asker]

Can't a date be done online?

[Iron_Man]

what do you actually do online that’s considered a date

[Iron_Man]

After three years why quit now why not meet in person?

[Asker]

We're only dating for a seven months. He's 29 and I'm 20. We're planning to meet this Christmas. It's just, I'm trying to think if this relationship would last until then. Because at this point, I'm having a hard time trust him and scared if his feelings are true.

[Avicenna]

You might as well do it now

[Asker]

Thank you for your insight. But isn't the relationship somehow savable?

[Light909090]

You mean Salvageable and yes you can Salvage the relationship first you’ll need a knife 🔪 a bag and a screw driver.
Then to salvage the Relationship you will just voice your feelings and say I don’t want to always decide certain things even putting a note for him to read on the Fridge or Putting a note in his wallet if possible or Even making him a sandwich 🥪 for work and placing the note inside The bag so when he eats his lunch at work he can read the note 📝
Communication is key 🔑 got to explain to him without understanding between the both of you the relationship was doomed from the very beginning

[LazerBean]

When it isn't working.

[Guy13]

Never start LDR