Is it wrong to date someone you are not in love with?

[Anonymous]

I was watching this jubilee video (the "Should I come out to my wife" one) and the guy was explaining that, due to his community and the people in his life, he hid his sexuality by staying with this woman.

This kind of remind me of, albeit less of an issue, the stories of marriages where the couples weren't exactly in love or anything but still got/stayed together since they got along well enough to.

[WonderBell99]

No, it is not wrong to date someone you are not in love with if you have not been together for long. However, if you have been together for 3+ years and still have no romantic feelings for your partner whatsoever, yes, that makes you an asshole. Why? Because you chose to waste your time and theirs by hoping that love would seep in when obviously, you knew all too well that you would probably never be able to love them the way everyone deserves to be loved.

What's the point in being with someone I "just got along with"? I would much rather get a roommate instead of a partner.

The man who hid his sexuality seems selfish. Whatever the reason might be, at the end of the day, he still used her for HIS benefit. Doesn't she deserve to be with someone who would love her to the moon and back? He deserves true love as well. I feel like once the marriage is dead (aka, both of them have fallen out of love) and stay together for the sake of kids or financial reasons, it will further put a strain on their relationship even if they do get along with each other. People crave love... at least, most do. More often than not, they just end up resenting each other. I've had a real-life experience, thanks to my parents.

[Bethany22]

I might be happier with someone I got along well with than I would be with someone I'm madly in love with

[SnowedIn]

Wrong to date? No. Wrong to stay with them or confuse/delude them/string them along? Absolutely. Also wrong to stay in it hoping it steeps into love. But not wrong if two people say, hey, we have a relationship that's stronger than friends but maybe not love/spend the rest of our lives together--let's keep going with this. But it takes humility, self awareness, maturity, and communication.

[20yearsolder]

It's not wrong but in my opinion, you are wasting valuable time that could be used looking for someone that you do or will love. They being said, it's understandable that people don't want to be alone.

[DummBlonde_Sally]

You can find Happiness in any situation you are in, regardless of the circumstance. You will never find true long term satisfaction in anything.

Arranged marriages work because are aren’t made into an impossible ideal

[Berethor]

You talk about gays or about straights who prefer to choose with their brain and not feeling?

[Asker]

In either case where someone is with another person that they're not attracted to

[Berethor]

Didn't attraction is lust, not love? anyway arranged marriage was working fine in the past.

[Asker]

I suppose so, it seems like a lot of people here think both are equivalent to eachother. Especially when gays are brought up. Why do you think arranged marriages stopped being the norm?

[Berethor]

Western freedom and all that jazz, you can look at the arranged marriage trope. :)

[melanieeeB]

Not necessarily but I would be devastated if I found out that my future man is not with me for love. And I would never lead someone on or get into a relationship for beneficial reasons only

[fonduegirl]

A couple can have many personal reasons for staying in a loveless marriage. Like kids. But relationship? I'd say give it a few months and if you still don't see them in that way, break it off.

[sheenagwapa]

yes what's the use of datinh someone and you're not in love eith the perdon... you gotta have romantic feelings

[Havthrills]

Sounds like a waste of time for both people. How would the other person feel hearing he/she spent that time loving someone that only likes them?

[bubblegunnn]

For me yes it is wrong. I never dated to guys i dont love

[alc24]

I don’t think it’s wrong, but I feel like it robs you of true happiness.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

That's not true love then. So yeah it's wrong. You're only leading him on for something else you want that's not love which defeats the purpose of relationships.

[hafinjun]

Not even a little bit, just don't do anything you shouldn't,

[bean2k21]

Girl, all you gots to love is how my chocolate lips taste.

[Agape93]

Nope, love comes with time dating someone.

[FilmGuy93]

What the hell? No. No, never

[LavLavLuv]

Complete waste of time😬

[Jerre]

No, it is not wrong!

[Jerre]

Thank you for the Like

[eagle1951]

dating vthem no

[Jennz6]

Nope

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

Why would you date someone you wouldn’t like?

[In_Trance]

no it isn't