What helped you to move on from a person you were in love with?

Question

Rkbleezy · Accepted Answer

Honestly, replaying everything from the beginning and coming to terms with the end.

When you start from the beginning in your mind you'll feel the rush of all the emotions, they will be intense but you shouldn't stuff or stifle your heart. There is no good reason to carry extra baggage with you, your acquire a lot in life anyway.

Eventually you'll come to the point when you'll remember where you think things went wrong, this is the best part because not only will you be freeing yourself of the attachment by crying and whatever, but also you'll be able to learn quite a considerable amount of good information from this period of time. Things you should have watched for, done more of or less of, things that were pretty rude or disrespectful, things that you just got to comfortable with, things you took for granted, and all of these can be either about you or about them. But I tend to focus on myself in this time because I am the person that wants and needs the growth and recovery, they are already gone after all.

And finally you'll come to the end where you feel it all crashing down like a beautifully ugly crescendo. At the time this will feel like the worst and hardest part to deal with, but with time and repetition you'll gain not only freedom from these emotions, but wisdom and understanding that you can use for the next relationship.

Just remember, the next person will never be like the last and that's perfect. Because the last didn't work, so if they were the same then you would already know the end of the story.

Take your time, don't rush, and don't pursue anyone in any regard except for friendship. Having a situation ship or date or relationship in this time will not only waste your time, but waste others time too. And it will inevitably lead to one or both parties feeling hurt again.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Her younger sister. My ex left me for a man who was better than me in every way. Taller, handsome, bigger dick, made more money, flashy car, big house, family had money, ivy league college etc. I was kinda down about it all and her younger sister who I'd always gotten on well with was very nice to me after and we'd always gotten on well when she was younger. We were neighbours and her sister an I had been high-school sweethearts. My parents died in a car crash and the you ger sister was really there for me. One summer I became very aware that she was not a little girl anymore as her body had filled out and she had grown some pretty large breasts, she was way prettier than my ex. Anyway she had started to wear very tight revealing clothes when ever she was around me. One day she caught me staring at her cleavage and I had gotten an erection, next thing I know we were making out and I took her virginity right there in my kitchen, it was all over in about thirty seconds. Anyway we had to wait until she was 18 so we sneaked about for 3 years until she was. I was her date to her sister's wedding who completely freaked out about it. A few years on we ate happily married with two children. I'm making good money and renovated my parents house. My ex is getting divorced her perfect guy turned out to not be so perfect with gambling, drinking and a drug problem as well as cheating on her. Last Christmas she was such a bitch at the family dinner, she's fat and unhappy.

hIopinionated_ · Accepted Answer

Hmm I guess I never really truly been in love because it was so easy for me to walk away from any guy I been involved with. I feel that real love would consume you and waking away would be a huge struggle. Like you feel that your heart would explode without this person even if they’re bad for you or isn’t a good person because that’s what I believe feeling real love is. Therefore, since I can walk away from anyone I guess, maybe, I haven’t experienced the magic. The magic where I stop over analyzing a guy and just admire how amazing I think he is. Or I am no longer cautious but completely open to anything he have to offer because my walls are completely down, shattered, even and no longer exist.

When or if that ever happens (which I hope it doesn’t) I would like to believe walking away would break me because the love I felt was that good

Damn love sounds scary lol

__cassiexxx · Accepted Answer

I went back every single time. Everytime. I went back even though I knew it would hurt me. In fact I literally turned into alcoholism because I was so hurt. It got to the point where I was so so hurt I just couldn’t go back again and I hated feeling depressed every single day and I lost everyone. The feeling of being hurt everyday for a year and self sabotaging led me to just leave because I had no choice. If I stayed I think I would have lost myself and lost everything, I lost my job friends and it was getting to the point my life was on the line so I had no choice but to leave. I can finally breathe better now

AviatorTom · Answer

Falling for another woman... it's the best way to move on.

Summeroflove · Answer

The next person I fell for

Guy13 · Answer

Staying very busy and no sitting.

BlueScorpio · Answer

Usually time and distance helps.

fembotnpc777 · Answer

1. Not leaving until I was absolutely sure there was no way to improve the relationship. Most women skip this step, and try to lead with the logical: this is bad, therefore, I should leave. However, your emotional brain is going to make excuses after you leave to go back to the guy, everytime. So you have to eliminate the possibility of returning.

2. He tried to call me with fake semi-remorse, guilting, etc, I just kept reminding him what a shitty person he had been to me, what he'd done to me, etc. I didn't defend myself, I didn't prove to him he was a bad guy, I just got it out of my system that he was bad and why. And eventually he stopped calling me, because I wasn't nice. I was a reminder of how he fucked up. As an example, I actually caught him cheating, and he tried to tell me a didn't. This was a narc, and he was trying to use me as supply. So I became a very bad supply, so that he'd leave me alone.

The whole thing was awful, but this is how I survived.

KBird · Answer

I just think about how they didn't value me, or didn't want my love, and that it is their loss. They were lucky to have my love, and even though I felt like I lost initially, being vulnerable and loving someone is a huge strength. I deserve to be loved as much as I love them. Why would I waste my breath and energy on someone who doesn't want to fight for me?

It took me a long time to get over my ex, but Im a lot stronger now because of it. As well, now that the relationship is over, you can find someone who is deserving of your love.

ThinkFitness23 · Answer

I looked to improve myself in every way…

I completed my studies.

Lost weight and got into very good shape (was very athletic growing so this was relatively easy for me).

I did have sex with others, not sure this helped, just felt alone.

This was 12 years ago, I’m now a company director, financially stable. I’m in a loving relationship I’m in good health and although this is unlikely if I ever saw her again I’m sure she would be shocked a little to see how I now live.

I still have a special place in my heart for this girl and always will I guess.

Dealing with the rejection was a first for me and I didn’t take this well at the time, this is just one lesson that I learned, I now look back at the relationship as a success as this was a part of my journey.

aaron210419 · Answer

Take time to get to know yourself again, especially if it was a long term relationship. Pick up old interests that you may have set aside or discover new ones. Don't jump into another relationship right away no matter how tempting it may be, you have to take some time to process things or you'll carry over those problems into the new relationship. Work on yourself for yourself, not with the intent of making your ex jealous or regret leaving you. Stay busy and keep your mind busy in the most healthy ways you can. Throw or give away anything that is too painful to look at, and don't obsess over them. There will be others and the more you look back the more you miss what's ahead of you.

Anonymous · Answer

Keeping away from them. Cut them out of your life completely if possible. If they don't get why that is needed then they're being a jerk. If they truly care about you they'll understand. Think about all of thier bad points. I guarantee you they have them. When you fall in love with somebody. Your body creates hormones that help you feel closer to someone till you bond with them. So your body has spent a while chemically telling you you feel more towards this person that you logically would. So you have to reverse this process. Think of all thier bad points and keep playing them in your mind in and endless loop. Till you believe it.

Love is a sham man. I have a personal rule, "Never love someone so much you can't get along without them". Because statistically speaking it's probably going to end. It's j7st a matter of time. Always keep a part of your heart that will NEVER belong to her.

WildCard42 · Answer

Analyzing the relationship to understand why I'm better off away from her and remembering the problems we had, not just the good times. We're exes for a reason.

Then meeting new women and figuring out that there's billions of better options out there for me. Don't get hung up on past relationships, start a new one, with a new woman, and make it even better. Love isn't a one time thing, you can fall in love over and over if you're open to it.

sheenagwapa · Answer

i am treated horribly and just had enough of their abuse because they wanna test me put me in a re-enactment if i will still be with her son or him even if i'm struggling so bad but the thing is since i know their intention i just get mad and feel used

JPresidente · Answer

It's all about mental fortitude. You either shift your mind or shift your heart. Find you a new girlfriend or shift your mental focus. Find something that is an attainable goal such as physical fitness for example and pour your mental strength and energy into that work on becoming your best you.

rienna888 · Answer

By my ex ignoring me for a month after our two year relationship (he didn't even break up), just to tell me he is dating someone new and is happy. Then I just downloaded a dating app and went on several dates. Got over it pretty fast. Not completely but I fell in love with somebody else. :)

art84 · Answer

I was in love with a girl and what made me move on her was seeing her with her husband and baby and looking happy together. They just looked like a happy family and that they were meant for each other. We never "dated" or anything serious but what helped me was knowing that I got that closure. Guess you call it puppy love more than what love actually is for a person. Though there's different kinds of love and I never experienced actual love just being in "love".

Marklaw12 · Answer

It's very hard especially when you invest so much.

I would say, what helped me was going out more. I was making sure I didn't get stuck at home.

If you stay at home, depression sets in. You begin to see a lot of TV shows and movies that take away valuable time.

Just always go out for a walk. Listen to music too

CrazyGirl2 · Answer

Meeting a wonderful guy who never once pressured me, or pushed me to “get over” it. He was kind, patient, and very understanding. By the time I was at a point where I was truly ready to move on, I was already in love with him!

Kiaros21 · Answer

Usually if someone else is there to pass the time. But there was this one particular person I had to continuously break up with and get back until I didn't feel like getting back no more, and I got over it.

MementoMori777 · Answer

Acceptance, aventually you'll get used to living without the person again, time is a natural healer and the best choice by far, in the meantime keep your mind busy with things you enjoy or things that take full concentration.

SnowedIn · Answer

Time and distance. Recognition that nothing I was going to do would change it (whatever 'it' is). That even though it hurts, it's not always personal.

bubblegunnn · Answer

Take my time to heal my wound even tho its not gonna completely heal, but move on to a new guy, make myselt busy w him he will take the rest to heal my wound slowly and complete..

MIMOSACHALLENGE · Answer

You realize this person probably doesn't think about you as much as you think of them. So why waste your time ruining your own future over someone who was not meant to be in it.

Tina19 · Answer

It took me 5 years to get over the grief of the end of a long term relationship i am in a very happy and satisfied place in my life now time is the best healer

Anonymous · Answer

I'd say I'm moved on enough. I just figured most relationships don't last and I still got a lot out of him being in my life for a time. Also, if he loved me for a bit, then there must be at least something loveable about me, and that I can likely be loved again, and possibly enough to last after I fix the mistakes I've made.

Kori1236 · Answer

The fact that he broke trust and if I were to let him back in again I knew I’d never be able to trust him again. After that time and distance

Saltystardust · Answer

Honestly both, knowing that I couldn't bare to look at a kid that, was most likely not mine and meeting my wife about a year later.

CA4444 · Answer

Time… and depending on how it all went, apologies and explanations…

Twalli · Answer

For starters my SO is not the only person I found attractive when I asked her out. The other girls are still attractive. Also if I used to love thrm, then I don't really need to get ivee thrm because I no longer love them.

Sanamina · Answer

Trusting that God is trading my toyota for a ferrari.

JHNS98 · Answer

Either time or distance, or both. Otherwise you just decide that enough is enough at some point.

Koefan4eva · Answer

I wouldn’t say I was in love but we worked together so I quit jobs and blocked him on social media

Alwayreckles93 · Answer

I wish dating values were like Victorian area that's all I can say.

AimeeKyle · Answer

Time……and more time. And ultimately finding someone else. It can be very challenging, lonely, sad for sure. You just have to own your feelings and power through it (and stay busy).

Randalama · Answer

She was hit by a steamroller and killed on impact. The foreman told me her soul was obliterated and there was nothing left to mourn. He seemed like a nice fella so I took his word for it.

sheikalana · Answer

Honestly putting myself out there and surrounding myself with friends.

JonesT19 · Answer

get away totally from the person... start to be in present... do work properly and try to get improvement daily routine

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

Acceptance. Self love and self respect. Discipline. Learning to say no and ghost people who are disrespectful.

TroyDT2 · Answer

I guess since I've never been "in love" it has never been difficult to just move on.

hotwheelz78 · Answer

For me, falling in love with someone else... For my girlfriend, having sex with multiple anonymous guys..

Mangospacho · Answer

Just time and then they married someone else, which surprisingly helped me move forward since I found someone within a couple months after.

Andres77 · Answer

They hurt me so much IN the relationship that it wasn’t hard to move on

AsaKyo · Answer

Realizing that he was a toxic asshole and knowing I could do much better

AdithyaR · Answer

Accepting that they're way out of my league and I had no chance with that person.

LadiesFavoriteToy · Answer

Hook up with the opposite sex and consider cutting his dick off if he tried to get him meat stick anywhere close to my bum hole.

Sparkie460 · Answer

I don't dwell on the past. I just keep going forward

Avicenna · Answer

Meeting other women

ZenJen444 · Answer

You just move on. If you're mistreated why would you love someone like that anyway?

more_than_a_guy · Answer

Keep yourself busy

Papabubbles · Answer

Time is the only thing that will truly help move on, but getting laid dulls the pain.

Anonymous · Answer

I fucked as many girls as I could till the pain went away

Anonymous · Answer

Tbh probably not what you want to hear but sleeping with multiple women

ProVox · Answer

Slept with her sister...

elizamichale1 · Answer

My older brother

jamesgoldman · Answer

My business, work, college and alcohol

Anonymous · Answer

Meet someone else. Nothing lasts forever.

Blueeyes81 · Answer

Hookers and blow 😔hoooookkkers and blow.

Grubhub · Answer

Meeting new and wonderful people.

Jltakk · Answer

I just gave up over time.

NavyblueTacos · Answer

Time

Anonymous · Answer

Other girls 😍

exitseven · Answer

alcohol.

What helped you to move on from a person you were in love with?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

What helped you to move on from a person you were in love with?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.