If someone catches a cheater in the act can even that be worked out?

[Anonymous]

Lets say in the worst case scenario, you really do walk in on them... can that even be worked out?

I think I've only heard one successful story here but I'm having a hard time processing how anyone can come back from that. Wouldn't they have triggers forever?

Yes, anything is possible

No, not possible at all

Other

Updates

+1 y

I'm having a hard time to actually think a human can be capable of forgiving that and still work it out. Isn't that too much to work out? Is it really possible? To reconcile that?

[SarahS98]

The only thing in life that's not possible if bringing someone back from the dead but yes anything else is possible.

Personally, I woud break up immediately after getting cheated on but my parents worked it out long ago. My dad caught my mom with his friend long ago in 1992. He still married her in 1996, cheated back in 2000, they worked it out again and they're still together and stronger by now.

[SarahS98]

Things that helped them reconcile after both cheating (unlike mom, dad confessed to his cheating):
- complete remorse from the cheater... mom bought him a new couch
- the cheater's willingness to be an open book, never arguing nor becoming defensive
- if in a relationship couple therapy and individual therapy for dad to help him with the images... if married then marriage counseling
- both hard work from the cheater and the partner's willingness to forgive

[Andres77]

i was willing to but i waited to confront her. i saw cars in my driveway so ui snuck around back, i saw them through the window. so they weren't stopping. i didn't handle it well.

[Andres77]

i wanted to see just how bad things really were. they were much worse than i expected. if i would have confronted her immediately i don't think i would have known how bad things were. bottom line, we needed to divorce.

[SarahS98]

I think what killed it in your case is that she showed no remorse at all. That's needed in order to work things out.

[Andres77]

@SarahS98 after catching her more than once and my neighbors finally telling how busy she'd been everty single time i deployed... that's when i filed.

[SarahS98]

yeah if they continue doing it over and over, they don't care at that point and it's not worth saving anymore. Good thing you've divorced her. Hopefully you find better one day.

[Andres77]

@SarahS98
That was my first. I’m on #3 now.

[Andres77]

But thanks

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

For some, people, yes. For me personally, the relationship will be over.

[Asker]

Yes that would be too much to worked out. I can't imagine getting intimate with them again after seeing how the other person was all over them... yuck.