Are RELATIONSHIPS worth it? No. Is marriage worth it? Both, yes and no.
What do I mean by that? The idea of marriage is needed in society to give security and stability to children living in a two parent household. However, western society has completely messed up the institution of marriage and made the stakes way too damn high that a lot of men are thinking twice about it now.
On the other hand, let's talk about relationships. Relationships - in my humble opinion - are nothing but a waste of time. 9 times out of 10 they do not lead to marriage, because they end up in a break up. The problem is centered around the idea that you have to love someone in order to be with them. Love is a feeling, and feelings can come and go consistently. You can never love your spouse 100% of the time, sometimes you have an argument and you hate them for a bit but then reconcile.
Reconciliation happens over a sense of duty and commitment, because you don't want to lose what you've built with the other person, not because you love them. This is why men are more likely to try and work out relationships, while women are more likely yo leave.
Me personally, I've always been a lone wolf. I do my best work when I'm alone because I can focus better. This is why personally I have never been in a relationship, and don't plan on getting in one until I'm ready to tie the knot. I plan on doing things the old school way, get to know her family and then allow mine to do the vetting, but for that she also needs to have the same traditional mindset. I believe I still have more to work on, so it would be unfair for myself and my partner if I half-ass the marriage because of immaturity. However if you're asking if having a family is worth it, absolutely 100%. That's the ultimate goal that keeps me focused.
If you want my advice, keep searching but be more selective in your criteria and try to vet women better, because at the end of the day there's light at the end of the long dark tunnel.
Maybe a complicated question. People are selfish, and many go into relationships thinking that the relationship will make them happy. Newsflash: it doesn’t work that way. That’s a largely selfish motive. Plus, in a relationship, you’re dealing with all of the other persons crap (figuratively speaking) in ADDITION to your own. Society has really messed up our understanding of what relationships are supposed to be (some people are confused to the point where they supposedly don’t even know what gender they are…..).
Yes, relationships are worth it, but our selfishness/sin and human nature has MASSIVELY screwed things up.
For a lot of people, it's hormones like sex and companionship that dictate for them that they want to be with someone. Pure simple biology in their blood taking hold of their decisions!
From my 38 going on 39 years on here, I don't know if it's worth it either, especially with the way men are these days. My mom got so lucky with my dad. They're going on their 46 years married this December 18th. It's crazy. As for me though, I have yet to find someone who truly loves me enough to sacrifice for me or to be able to truly give me what I want and need in a relationship! 😔 However, so far, I have met in my life, MAMA'S BOYS, ASSHOLES that just wanted me for one thing, a Homeless Drug addict and abuser/narcissist!
Ah boy ugh lol...
@TenderFantasy - "the way men are these days". ROFL. Have you not seen the cheap prostitute-wannabe women of modern generations? Dressed like streetwalkers, sleeping with anyone who pays them a little bit of attention, and wondering why they're dumped the next day.
There's plenty of decent men around, sluts, whores & free prostitutes didn't get men like your mother's husband back 30, 40 or 50 years ago either. Just it was normal for a woman to be a lady & not a tramp back then... while nowadays it's normal to be a tramp & abnormal to be a lady.
@Vegasrunner Haha, thanks for the hidden insult. No I did NOT do drugs or any of that stuff so how can you say that it would be a reflection of me? I cannot control those people and how they acted! Towards me specifically in this case! How mean of you to say those things! And I am GLAD that those people and I didn't work out considering those things I said about them!
And I'm happily single anyway, most days that is.
By the way, I never said I was perfect. Are you? I am aware of my imperfections but there were no where NEAR the flaws any of my exes had!
they were I mean.
@APrettyLittleLady87
No fortunately he is NOT right and you don't know my situation so how DARE you assume otherwise! When I was 31, I met this guy who was into drugs (but not always, he got worse when he got older). Anyway, he was 8 and a half years older than me. Obviously he took me for a ride and tried to groom me as he was older and knew more! I was working at a local pharmacy store at the time, and he charmed me up and I fell for it! I went out with him for almost a year and even became intimate with him! And through that year I got to know him and his friends, the type of people he hung out with, drank with, etc. I thought it was harmless fun, so I joined them! Actually, he was not homeless those many years ago that I met him, but he was renting a room in an apartment with some acquaintances of his. He was actually more responsible back then. Anyway, yeah, it's really rude of you to just assume "birds of the same feather, flock together" because that isn't true of ALL cases! I am sure you've also heard of the phrase, "opposites attract" right? ? ! Well he could NOT have been more different than me (he had blonde hair and blue eyes, while I had black hair and dark brown eyes as a Filipina Asian woman!) So yeah, that's definitely one aspect of him that I found attractive, especially at first! And like I said, he basically deteriorated in his 40's for some reason, but by that time, I fell deeply in love. He was actually my fiance. He's so far been the only guy that has ever proposed to me.
And like I said about those other guys, I could not have controlled the behaviors of those people so I really do not understand why you guys are blaming me for THEIR behaviors! I know it takes two but that's one reason those relationships didn't work out! Because we were not compatible!
@APrettyLittleLady87 I am NOT immature, god you're an asshole. BLOCKED! You just think you are PERFECT! Well news for you, you're FAR from it!
@Vegasrunner I was more immature then, people just MATURE at different ages. My God go to hell and fuck you all!
The moment we start comparing our flaws with those of our fellow man, we’re in trouble. Either pride or insecurity begin to sneak into our thought processes. In other words, be very careful about saying things like “I am aware of my imperfections but there were no where NEAR the flaws any of my exes had!”
I remember a few years ago, I took a step back and took an objective look at myself. I started seeing flaws, bad habits etc that I didn’t know were there. It was humbling and necessary. You can’t fix a problem that you’re not aware of
@all_hayl Oh yeah you can bet I've taken self-introspection but the thing is, have THEY? ! How can people on here just have the GALL to assume negative things about me like that when they don't even really know me! Also, if it WERE the case that I was the problem then how come my ex's life got WORSE! He actually became HOMELESS! I only ever took drugs ONCE (if it wasn't prescribed) and it was Marijuana and I will NEVER do that again because my body isn't used to it so I just threw it all up! And like I said, it takes TWO to have a successful relationship not just ONE so it's never just one person's fault! I'd appreciate it if people didn't indirectly BLAME me for things other people do that I have NO control over! Now THAT is immature and mean/rude in and of itself! Maybe I just had a big heart and I was very attracted to him! Like I said, some people take awhile to mature and some people NEVER mature! It really depends! People act like they are perfect or that they know me well enough to decide what's wrong or what went wrong! Look at yourselves in the mirror for once!
Ask yourself this:
1. Do you want to die alone?
2. How do you prevent yourself from dying alone?
3. Who would you want by your side throughout your adult life?
4. How do you develop those relationships which allow for you to have those by your side?
5. Do these relationships require effort to maintain? How? And what responsibility do you need to take within yourself to be able to be in a good relationship?
6. What makes this/these relationship worth keeping?
7. Are you healthy mentally? If not, how can you sort yourself out?
Thank you.
You're still gonna die alone unless in the future somehow science can merge consciousnesses together
Opinion
25Opinion
The motivation for Relationship is that we were intelligently designed so that man and woman need one another to become whole in all relational areas. Family, Generational Line, and sheer sexual, mental, and emotional pleasures make-up Relationship.
Risk does not always mean longterm Reward. None of us want or desire to be alone, no matter how much we complain, or you would not be here communicating.
Chase skirt more and worry less….
To have someone to do things with, to care about, etc. You can have sex with anyone but it's not the same as actually caring for someone and spending time with them.
They can be if you put in the work/effort to keep it going and happy 😊
For me Relationships start off highly intoxicating with dopamine and oxytocin boosts. The sex is fantastic and the feel goods are plentiful. A relationship can mean so many different things to different people.
Once the honeymoon phase ( all the fun stuff I listed above) you are now in a relationship with someone you love or can’t stand. All those hormones sand chemicals you were getting in the beginning wear off.
Choose wisely and you might be surprised that you found the love of your life. But if not , dust yourself off and try again.
Coming from someone who is clearly single and never had experience with women except getting a hand job from his guy friend😂😂. Again you sound bitter lol. I’m not a southern but I’m glad you broke down how successful black women can be. I’ve pulled more men from every ethnicity in one year than you have in 5. And that’s without having sex with them, or being a “gold digger”. Your clap back sucks.
And your a pussy for blocking me😂😂
-@dowser19
I want to answer this question so badly but having never been in a relationship while thinking I should experience one instead of staying single all the time, I can't seem to be able to decide it's worth it or not, especially when I'm experiencing a good amount of hesitation on whether to really seek one at an age I'm more likely to get advantage off and having seen my fair amount of failed relationships at my age and people at their 20s
You're a guy. I'm a guy. In the U. S. today, EVERY female who's not 300 pounds that's under 40, is selling content. A relationship? I seriously doubt most know what the hell that even is.😂You basically have to go somewhere so far out that livestock outnumber humans at least 3 to 1... to find one who MIGHT be worth a try. And avoid college ones. They're definitely not. So the odds are HEAVILY stacked against a guy who's not rich, famous, a thug or a Chad from family money. You have much better odds of turning $100 into 10K in 1 night at the craps table in Vegas.
👋👋👋👋No ones paying attention to Black American females, except Hollywood celebs shilling products and Fortune 500 CEO's, who need the money the 6 percent of the population that they constitute will toss into their accounts.😂Black American chicks are SLAVES to marketing and Hollywood. Go away... anyone with half a brain isn't interested in you... go away. Memphis, New Orleans, Detroit and Atlanta await you.👋👋👋Go away, go away👉
Relationships are worth it if they lead to marriage down the road. I don’t want a fuck buddy with a girl. I consider those types of relationships to be toxic and pointless. It’s funny people talk about confidence, confidence, confidence. There are feminist extremists on this site who bash guys and are extremely negative to guys online who are hurting. I say this because feelings reflect both sides. Im tired of this broken system that showers women with a broken heart but for guys and men it doesn’t matter. And for years I also hear women bitching that a guy she digs or her boyfriend or her husband isn’t “expressing” himself, yaaa no shit? That’s how society has shaped men. Any girl who reads this and dislikes my comment just remember you’re also part of the problem because I’m speaking facts. If any of y’all want to label me as Judas or a piece of shit or whatever go ahead, but I know what I am talking about.
Relationships are worth the time and effort if there's chemistry and a connection, the person is genuine and has their s**t together!
I've been single for 19 months now and so far I can't say that I've found a woman who is worthy of my time.
The best advice I can give any man is to stay single and childless. Next advice is to DNA test all the kids she claims is your kids. The one thing that's true in life is that all women LIE AND CHEAT. They are lying when they say they don't. TEST your kids to see who their father is. 50 percent of the times it was her ex boyfriend.
I feel you dude, I soon hit 27 and have never been in a relationship. After seeing friends and online stories talking about miserable experiences I also wonder if its really worth.
Although I'm still a human being and wish to have intimacy, not just sex but also being able to cuddle with a girl who supports me, is on my side and I can enjoy time with
Depends on the individual and what u want out of life I still enjoy being with my partner and knowing she wants to be with me also the aspect of having a family with her is still what I want out of life
A meaningfully cultivated loving relationship is worth everything you put into it. Dating is a black hole. No light can escape.
I haven't been in an actual serious relationship yet... I like to think it's worth it... still, it's very rare when I see two people together who are actually happy and satisfied... Most of them are just meh or even flat out bad...
For men it really isn't. Most women today don't adhere to traditional values but still expect men to adhere to their role. In addition, a lot of women are entitled, constantly looking to trade up and chasing after that instagram lifestyle.
They can be worth it if the relationship makes u happy, cared for and loved. If the relationship is toxic, unloyal and unhappy then it's not worth it
Yes they are. I love the feeling of love. Also I do enjoy some chaos. All emotions are thrilling. Life without all emotions is boring.
😂 I don't mean I cause chaos on purpose. In fact, I've never caused anything such as true chaos. Only mild chaos, not harmful chaos... in a reasonable person... and actually I've been learning from psychological experts that it is unhealthy to push down all emotions. You can express them in healthy ways. Communication is meant to resolve issues. And problems are meant to strengthen relationships.
Life itself throws enough chaos at you. And sometimes you and your loved ones face them together. It is try not to fight each other and fight the problem.
You get to define the terms of your relationships if you define them well then like everything else they are beneficial if you define them poorly then yes it is more trouble than its worth.
I think relationships are worth the effort. You need strong boundaries and you need deep respect for each other, but the relationship two people can share has the potential to be life changing.
Yes, if you actually find someone good, and if they're willing to try. But most good woman I have found do not even want to date (anyone.) They just want to live alone. I think they are afraid of having their heart broken.
When the two people involved are easygoing, the relationship is awesome.
Hence what you need is just to be that person, and to find someone else like that.
Random, no. Ones that you feel in your gut. Yes.
Being single isn't worth it in my opinion. It's too boring.
No because guys always wanna be bossy and demanding and accuse of liking other men
It's what you make of it. Sadly, a lot of people don't want to put in any effort.
Rarely. Modern woman bring nothing but headache and trauma from the many relationship she had before they think it's okay to have high body count and with all that baggage she want to be treated right way no way
Emotional baggage from most women aren't worth it from my experience.
In my opinion, from my experience, no. They’re not worth it.
The point is companionship. Are you actually satisfied being alone?
Well if it something you want yeah, it's worth it, if not then no.
Some are. Some are not due to people not knowing what they want in life.
I’m sure it’s different for different people but for me, I enjoy having someone to share my life with. Of course, there are also relationships that are tumultuous.
Can I ask you a question?
Only the ones that are far more play than work.
I thoroughly enjoy being loved by the ladies instead of rather having been abused, abused and abused.
I think Relationships are worth it, But it has to be the right Person.
I decided to be single forever. I feel great that I don’t have to suffer from rejection and chasing down the people I don’t even know. Bible says being a single is better. So I want to try it.
They absolutely are.
It depends if the person is worth it tbh
That depends on you and your priorities.
I think so just be careful thats all.
Yes they are just haven’t found the right one
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