How do you know your in love and not just lust or infatuation?

Question

I think I fell in love with a man I cannot be with, for personal reasons, and he tries to stay away because he knows there is no light at the end if the tunnel. We are both really the same and completely opposite in a way I cannot explain no matter how many times I try to be concious about it and explain it to myself over the course of 4.5 years now. Everytime I say to myself if I do this I will forget him and with time it will get better, but it only gets worse!! I've never felt this way ever in my whole life about anyone. He just seems to be unperfectly perfect for me!! So is it because I cannot be with him that this is happening? Or is it really love?

Blackmoonsns · Accepted Answer

Les would be defined as a position where you only want to be with this person merely for sexual romantic games love is when you actually care about somebody who they are as a person you find them attract because who they are their dreams their skills their ambitions and the physical intimacy will really take a back door to an actual caring about someone. And you'll find that we actually love and care about someone sexual intimacy will be much deeper much more fulfilling whereas some of you're just hooking up with you realize what it is and you can carry either way if it lasts or doesn't

SnowedIn · Accepted Answer

It might be neither, actually. It might be that you continue to think about him and so thinking about him is rooted in your mind and both your conscious and sub-conscious. 4.5 years is an egregiously long time. That's not love. Love is knowing someone intimately through a relationship -- that's not what you have. Maybe you want to have sex with him and so that's lust, but there's something deeper there that's neither love nor lust.

catiecatie · Accepted Answer

Love can be hard as if you truly loved someone then you could see them with someone else even though it would hurt you a little inside. That’s why some people say “If you loved me, you would let me go.”
Lust is like an obsession I’ll admit it. I like this guy and he knows I exist, but will he ask me out I don't know only time can tell, but I can’t wait around for him forever. I’ll admit it’s a crush and it’s hard but they also call them a “crush” for a reason.

dustybiker · Accepted Answer

Sounds like obsession.  Love is selfless, non-possessive. If you truly love something, you can let it go, as you know you don’t own it.

genericname85 · Answer

honestly, i just don't. only time can tell. time that you spent in a relationship together tho. not time spent obessing about the other person. if you litterally can not get with him, i'd saywork on getting over it. if there is a possibility, i'd check it out if i was you.

exitseven · Answer

You really have a complicated mess of a relationship. It might be that you have been in this relationship for so long it just feels normal and maybe it is scary to think of living alone again. It can seem like a bad relationship is better than no relationship at all.

AmeerX · Answer

It's not lust. Lust would be if you slept with him. I hope you don't do that with him.

You should try to befriend his wife and see what's on her mind. If he is defensive then he is not going to be with you. You might be happy in polygamy

Anno2 · Answer

If you're in a strange situation where only 1 of you survives, who would you choose? Kinda extreme but my point is, infatuation is more selfish than love.

BJP21 · Answer

Because everyday feels like the first day you met and it never gets lost.

Anonymous · Answer

Real love... i been head over heels deeply in love with demi for over 5 years. No it's not infatuation or lust or looks it's purely in my heart and soul which both belong to her

CA4444 · Answer

Have you been attracted to other guys during that time or do you watch other guys? What makes you not see a future with him if you live him? I guess we can have all sort of love/attachement to a person, each person and relationship is unique

Wise4myage · Answer

When I don't want to jump in the sack after just meeting a girl.

Anonymous · Answer

Pretty simple love is selfless, while love is selfish. If you're not putting your partner before you, it's not love.

Guy13 · Answer

It takes awhile.

Anonymous · Answer

You're*

How do you know your in love and not just lust or infatuation?

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How do you know your in love and not just lust or infatuation?

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