Why do some men never settle down?

Question

In their 40's and still act and live the lifestyle as if they were in their 20's. Will they do this until they're in their 70's or eventually settle down?

SpokenTruth · Accepted Answer

Early on in my teens I begin to realize things. All but two were my girlfriends I begin to realize they all had one thing in common that being tunnel vision and a guy's worth his money his career etc. None of them cared about the guys themselves only his worth career wise money wise.

I remember having a serious crush on a girl I still remember her name to this day. I didn't really know her. I spotted her one time riding through town which was what teenagers did back then ride through town to have a social life. I spotted her and I fell in love with her let me tell you I wanted to meet her bad and that opportunity came too.

One night the two girls and two friend of mine ended up all going for a ride together and invited me to go along too and I went along for the ride. I remember the whole entire time during the ride the only thing the girl I liked talked about was the popular guy on the strip his dad rich him driving a new sports car had his own credit card and he was going to attend college to be a attorney once he graduated.

She wanted to meet him etc etc on and on. But that wasn't enough. I ended up dating a girl after that and all she could talk about is the rich boy she dated before me. She also went behind my back and told how I was only temporary until something better came along which was the beginning of the end of that relationship as you might guess.

Then came the second girlfriend and the whole time I was dating her she was slipping behind my back cheating with guys her mom had her eye on as being what her mom saw as rich guys or better off. She continued until a friend called one day to confess he had slept with her one night when he drove her home ending that relationship too.

It was then I begin to see they all had one thing in common. It's wasn't about what a guy amounts to in terms of his worth financially speaking not about who he actually is not about him himself but what he had or has in his pockets. I also being to see the biased treatment I saw in life wasn't isolated cases at all it was very common.

I begin to see it was alone in how I saw and felt toward others and how they were toward me. And from there I was making a conscious determination I would more than likely never date again or get married. I left the idea somewhat open with a you never know up until the last ten years or so until in became clear to me there wasn't a chance to consider the idea again anymore. I guess you could say I settled down.

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

Cuz they probably did try settling down with a girl one time in their life and gave her everything and then she decided to be selfish and shit on his heart so his trust for girls went out the window , so devoting his life to another girl is going to be harder for him because he has a lot of walls up to protect his heart from ever being shit on again , especially in todays world where so many people are just plain out selfish and only really care about themselves , I had my heart shit on by my ex wife and it has been so hard for me to give myself completely to another girl, I still believe love exists it’s just harder to find these days , but I still try I am just more picky when it comes to it , for me to give myself complex to a girl she has to make me feel wanted and valued , a girl that knows how to remove selfishness for me like I do for her , a girl that wants to stay under the sheets with me not one That runs to the streets , one that accepts my flaws like I will accept hers , A girl that knows it’s her and I vs the world that has my back at all costs that will resist temptations from others for me , A girl that wants to see me smile not a girl that wants to bring misery into my life , A girl that won’t compare me to other men so until I find that girl my ass is single if she doesn’t have morals and she doesn’t prioritize me I am not going to prioritize her

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

They don't want to or never found someone to settle down with. Or they were hurt in the past. My uncle met a girl he really loved when he was 29 and she was 26. She broke his heart and cheated on him for a year and only admitted it when she gave him an STD.

Daniela1982 · Accepted Answer

They will finally settle down when they can't get it up anymore and even Viagra won't help. Why settle on Mcdonald's when they can get their fill at an all-you-can-eat buffet?

AviatorTom · Answer

If you're having fun playing the game, why stop... just keep on playing.

Guy13 · Answer

It’s more fun to play than work.

Summeroflove · Answer

Because that’s a personal choice.

UmbrusNightshade · Answer

Well, I'm almost 40 and still single. Now you have to understand, that this isn't by choice. Like myself, some guys have just had no positivity in trying to date. I suffered from severe depression, social anxiety and other neuroses in my youth so it made regular socialization difficult and romantic pursuits seemingly impossible. It took me this last decade of overcoming mental issues to even really try to start dating. So for some men it could be a similar situation and their late 30s/early 40s are essentially similar to a more experienced man's teens or 20s.

Beyond that some men, with qualities women tend to find attractive, are all about having as many sexual partners as possible within their lifetime. From a biological perspective, that makes sense for men. As long as they are able to continue getting new women in-between the sheets, these men will keep on doing the same sort of things. It's only when it starts to become increasingly difficult for these types to land new women that they start considering settling down. I've known several guys like this in my life.

Finally, some men get to a point where past relationships have done a number on them psychologically and so they may crave attention and validation from women, but because of past heartaches and pain they simply don't put forth the effort to make relationships work. They go into it thinking that IF they get a date and things go well for a while, at some point it's inevitably gonna fall apart... so they might as well get as much out of it as they can at first (whether sex or feelings of being validated, etc.). These men essentially feel trapped in an endless cycle of needing a woman's validation and attention only to have it end in loss, pain and heartbreak.

God_of_Thunder · Answer

I always wanted to get married, until I was betrayed, hurt, and emotionally destroyed by the woman that I loved more than life itself.

Now I just don't have it in me to risk going through that, again. It nearly killed me, so as far as I'm concerned, it's safer to simply remain single forever. No more pain.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Could be a fear of commitment and/or loss of freedom. In all truth, the most likely reason is that the guy is just sick of the headaches of dealing with women.

I hate to say it, but taking women seriously is just a ton of effort, and frankly the reward isn’t that great. I love women, but I’m having a hard time seeing myself taking one seriously as a life partner.

ZackBan · Answer

Why do some men settle down when they hit 30?

It's all relative to a person. Not everyone has to follow the same path in life.

If you still got that dawg in you then just embrace it.

Who decided that there's a right and wrong answer here. As long as you're not hurting anyone you get to make your own choices

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

If you didn't have a baby clock and you weren't dragged down by having to take care of somebody... how would you behave any differently?

Remember you're a man in this scenario... any fresh 18 year old will probably get with you and you have these single mothers with baggage, kids, and issues are trying to trap you. What would you choose as that man? Like seriously... you want the drama and baggage or someone that still wants to have some fun in life?

Anonymous · Answer

I'm not a player but I have no plans to settle down. I prefer being single and love life just how it is. That player you mention is unlikely to settle down. Few women truly ask what they bring to anothers life, they only look at what they can gain!

Lusciousphilippa28 · Answer

Because there's no need to settle down. If they have money, they have many options. If they have good looks, they have many options. Also, women haven't been taught how to be wives. Why bother if you can pay for it...

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Because some people just don't want to. Not everyone is attracted to the idea of being with one person having kids a dog a yard etc.

That is totally ok. My thing is to not worry about why others do things differently than me and worry about finding the people that I want to surround myself with that make me happy.

Anonymous · Answer

Why do some girls refuse to engage in certain sexual practices? It's a preference, a choice, and their right. The "why" really doesn't matter because understanding "why" isn't going to help you if you want to change the guy's behavior.

HaveNoName · Answer

There is always a right time for everything and it is not endless. Once you are past the average time of marriage, you get too used to and too rigid around bachelor life. And then it is too late. I am oybly talking about relationship of "married" life.

TheFlak38 · Answer

You didn't present any arguments on the advantages of settling down to begin with. Of course you didn't because you're a woman. Relationships and marriage serve only your interests. For every man who refuses to settle down one more woman from the female collective gets reduced resources and attention drugs.

CuriousMufuxka · Answer

Because it's pretty fuckin awesome! It sucks as well though. I'm about to be 44, I've actually settled down twice before to fail, and I've earned a lot more money being single. Getting another girlfriend would just drag me down. It would be like a 5 month fuckfest and agreeing before another shit show.

serious · Answer

What is wrong with having all the freedom and enjoying life. I mean as long they are not doing anything that is illegal or inappropriate there is nothing wrong in not wanting to settle down.

BCA6010 · Answer

"40s" isn't  that  old, and it usually isn't until a man starts (or tries to start) a family that he "settles down."

humanearth · Answer

Because I am a big kid at heart I still run, play, chase my grandkids like I will never die See I want them to remember as a fun person, not some old fart that don't move from his chair

MHolmes5190 · Answer

Depends on the man not speaking for every man but one of the reasons could be haven't found the right one to get him to stop searching don't want to use the word settle we should never settle for anything especially if we are not happy. Other reasons fear,
abandonment issues, not ready, immature etcetera

TrueConfection · Answer

Maybe they don't want to be crusty and old at 40. The guy in that picture looks like he's in his late 70s.

katestar · Answer

the reason is men has busy lives like work and finding jobs. that's the reason why men don't want to settle down. women are the same thing than the men.

es20490446e · Answer

I have never settle down because 80% of women that I dated didn't have the right mindset for that.

The other 20% I didn't find attracted enough to them. Although I have to thank them for being reasonable.

exitseven · Answer

Some people grow up and some people just get older.

Haha456 · Answer

decent guys tend to want to settle down. indecent guys tend to like to play around. Dont just date any guy, date a decent one

AmeerX · Answer

For these type of people, we say they want to drink milk but not buy the cow 🐄. Or they want to eat the fruit but not plant the tree.

Shameless really. If someone wants to have fun they can do it being married too.

4ngelic · Answer

not everyone wants too. you also dont need technically to ever settle down, its your life you do what you want

Aakash_Hangargi · Answer

How can one predict about someone else life? He might die before reaching 70 , he might turn gay. He might or he might not settle only he can tell

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Players are players for life, they are not marriage material.  Most women are also boring, and thus for me are not marriage material even though I'm straight and always wanted to marry.

Anonymous · Answer

They were never given a good enough reason to. Why do so many women choose just hookups and f*** buddies today over relationships. They probably feel similar. Why put effort into somebody that has no interest in putting effort into you.

Anonymous · Answer

So long as men are enjoying life and getting what they want without a wife, why add a wife to the mix?

Luopio27 · Answer

Not veryone wants a relationship or just one body to play with. Same goes for, SOME women, not all, not most, but still many.

SahuShekhar · Answer

When everything is going fine as it is why disturb it. I personally don't like this kind of adventure.

Ad_Quid_Orator · Answer

Because that's the lifestyle that they want to live and if the women he's with aren't ready to settle down either, what's the problem?

BarryLiverstone · Answer

How does he act like a player? Give a few examples.

admles · Answer

What's wrong with it? Who says people have to settle down? If they're enjoying their life, and are happy, why does it matter?

james_d0007 · Answer

Its ones life choice - some prefer 0 dramas and responsibilities and want to live for themselves till their last breath.

Jay3344 · Answer

Maybe they analyzed the risk reward of both and decided that they favored on over the other.

Anonymous · Answer

Some do want to settle down but they’ll probably been hurt too many times. Your man could be having a midlife crisis

msc545 · Answer

nobody over the age of 25 likes getting older.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

"Settle down"? Meaning marry some worn out, post wall, angry, bitchy female?

PainusNdeeAnus · Answer

Too much poon out there women turn 18 and dumb everyday

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Name one reason why he wouldn't? I am younger but on the same track.

dolemite89 · Answer

there’s not much benefit for a guy to do so, marriage and divorce benefit women waaay more.

Anonymous · Answer

If no-one wants you, you don't settle like a nomad or something

Figurine89 · Answer

It's likely not what they want I'm 33, but I also don't want marriage or kids

Tonyblony5150 · Answer

I'm still waiting to grow up and I'm 56, I kinda gave up on this subject.

Anonymous · Answer

Because we don't trust hole... I prefer to be player

Anonymous · Answer

Because society tells them they can. They think they have forever to find a wife so why bother doing it when they don’t feel like it?

Guccigabbana18 · Answer

Because it's not what they want in life.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

Rule Number One. Never Settle.

slatyb · Answer

They don't want to? No interest in being married?

Avicenna · Answer

Because they can

mobiusforniner · Answer

Because theyre a boy. Not a man

-Mad- · Answer

Because we age like fine wine🍷

OfDeath · Answer

Because that is how they want to live. Duh.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Some never settle down.

Fuentes · Answer

I would never settle down

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

because marriage is female privileged

Anonymous · Answer

A lot of men never mature.

Anonymous · Answer

Why should they?

Why do some men never settle down?

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