Why do men leave all of a sudden after so long?

Question

Together since highschool & recently married. Just poof. Couldn't do it.

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

Sadly there are a lot of people that don’t
Look at the big picture when jumping into a relationship with someone , they think they know what they want , but really they don’t , Most people are just infatuated by the thought of being in a relationship or a marriage with someone , but only on their terms. If things don’t go their way, they change their minds , thinking they are missing out on things, thinking they can’t be tied down to just one person after they made. The decision to do so. Sadly this sort of shit happens more than we like to think it does, why a lot of relationships and marriages don’t last the long haul as much these days. It’s mainly stems down to people having selfish mindsets , thinking grass is greener on the other side , not able to admit they are wrong , they can only admit to being right. Having that selfish mindset , will not last in any relationship period. I was married for 15 years until my wife all of a sudden decided she didn’t want to be tied down anymore , she felt like she was missing out on things , this started occurring when she got addicted to social media and constantly comparing her life to everyone else’s’ She stopped loving me and valuing me , and started to treat me like I was a convenience to her , she basically wanted her cake and wanted to eat it to. Her actions were speaking louder than words so I finally threw in the towel and told her to go live her selfish lifestyle. She is nothing but a user , and I feel bad for any guy that falls for her shit. Why I no longer rush into relationships with girls’ because most girls’ don’t really know what she wants unless it revolves around her , her way or no way , so I stay away from girls’ that have that selfish mindset as much as I can , and focus on girls’ that want to work as a team , that have their shit together that don’t depend on me to take care of them financially.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Well exactly how long have you two lived together? I ask this because in the beginning of dating each person thinks their man or woman is the best. But that’s because they’re not living together 24/7. That’s when you really find out how your perfect partner isn’t so perfect. I used to think the same w this one girl, gorgeous as hell. Always looked perfect. But then we started staying over at each others place. Man she was disgusting. Dirty room, clothes all over. Never cooked, never made her bed. She was atrocious. A grown woman. She’s never going to change. I split.

dustybiker2 · Accepted Answer

"Recently married" probably a sign. It's scarier than it appears from the outside if unprepared.

HelpfulWoman · Accepted Answer

you chose an idiot and expected a high school romance to last.

hahahmm · Answer

Let me guess: when you first got together you were chasing him and doing all the work of getting the relationship started. In that case, the second... I mean THE second a woman he finds more attractive or even just 1% better than you comes on to him he's running to them. Cause he didn't really value you. He just saw you as easy to get.

Now I'm not saying every guy would go down this road. But is it possible? Sure. Typically guys don't marry women they don't want to be married to tho. Unless he's an immigrant trying to get a green card. Or a loser trying to live off of a woman's money.

blueonblack22 · Answer

Funny I just helped a friend who just got out of 10 year relationship move out his place.

More likely then not he has been thinking about it for a very long time. Then at the opportune time he decided to call it quits. I know it’s heartbreaking and I’m sorry you are going though this.

On the bright side you are still young and there has to be plenty of viable good men out there. Take your time to mourn and recover. But you still got a future and options.

DannyUk2017 · Answer

Now depends... you say after "so long", maybe he was Giving You Hints about either he wanted something more serious, Or Not! But You never seen the signs or the Red Flags, so maybe he decided that what's enough is enough...🤷‍♂️... Or maybe he was just a Narcissist thinking of his Own Well being, so Maybe... there are a lot of "maybe" that we don't have the "insights" of it...

PointlessNonsenseGuy · Answer

It's odd that he decided to leave AFTER he married you. Leaving a girlfriend is a lot simpler and easier than leaving a wife.

Maybe there was something about married life that he didn't enjoy? Did he say anything to you about it?

ZackBan · Answer

Something was clearly festering for a long time.
He kept quiet hoping it would go away.
Instead it bubbled up to the surface and exploded all over your marriage.

It might be very sad but life finds a way to work itself out

Anonymous · Answer

Men are generally about the "status quo". Guys typically just want peace. Women are generally the gender that want more, and more, and more. This is typically why women leave. So either the guy is having some kind of midlife crisis (it can happen around 30 and 40). In which case she didn't lose anything, because she was always married to a flake and overlooked it. Or more likely, he got tired of striving for peace with a partner who was NEVER satisfied.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Well... relationships are great until they aren't; as it's said. So, my guess is that those guys probably spend a number of years gradually becoming unhappy, until they wake up one day and realize that they're miserable.

SotiCoto · Answer

You're talking about someone specific.  It isn't "why do men". It is an individual. And we don't know why he did that.

Meropatrick · Answer

He didn't like u as a wife. When things get serious or rough in the sea of life only good boats stay put together

DrPepper12 · Answer

Sorry. I don't know why either. Odd behavior to be sure.

DextroShade · Answer

This is rare, as women initiate 80% of divorces. The real question should be "Why do women leave?"

scott04sa22 · Answer

The people I seen always moves fast after dating me

Neatfinity_YT · Answer

I would never leave anyone. I never get bored of anyone. I’m as loyal as loyal gets.

sheikalana · Answer

He left without saying anything?

KrakenAttackin · Answer

As a rule men don't leave, women do.

noohair · Answer

All men? I don't think so.

OddBeMe · Answer

Sounds like you may have missed some clues.

HurremSultan · Answer

Change of heart

Joshgag2000 · Answer

Got bored

Why do men leave all of a sudden after so long?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Why do men leave all of a sudden after so long?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.