Bust up with my wife after 20 years married. Barring order 12 months. What usually happens when barring order is over?

[Anonymous]

I mean after twelve months... Is possible to move back home? Or that's a crazy idea?

Updates

+1 y

It's my houseI paid every cent towards it

Updates

+1 y

Thanks to everyone for your comments. Who knows what around the corner. I don't want to prejudge things. I will keep plugging away and posting questions here. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

After the barring order expires, it may be possible to move back home, but it's important to approach the situation with caution and to prioritize your safety and emotional well-being.

It's important to consider the reasons why the barring order was put in place and to assess whether those issues have been resolved or addressed. If the underlying issues have not been resolved, it may not be safe or healthy to move back home.

It's also important to communicate with your wife and to work towards rebuilding trust and addressing any issues that may have led to the separation and the barring order.

Consider seeking the support of a therapist or a mediator to help facilitate communication and to work towards a resolution that prioritizes the well-being of both parties involved.

Ultimately, the decision to move back home or not is up to you and your wife. It's important to prioritize your safety and well-being and to approach the situation with caution and open communication.

[Asker]

A good response

Following on from what you're saying.. It may not require 12 months to reach an agreement for me to move back.

However if we don't agree during the 12 months, I can forget about moving back

And then it becomes solicitors and divorce lawyers

[Asker]

The project of raising the kids is over ish. And not much left in the relationship. How did we ever get on.
My situation I've nowhere to live. But that's temporary. I'll get over that.

[Opinion Owner]

Thanks and it sounds like you're in a difficult situation, but it's good that you're keeping an open mind and trying to find a way forward that works for you and your family.

It's important to remember that divorce and separation can be emotionally and financially challenging, but there are resources and support available to help you navigate this process. You may want to consider seeking legal advice or mediation to help you reach an agreement with your wife about your living situation and other issues related to your separation.

It's also important to prioritize your own well-being and self-care during this time. This may involve reaching out to friends and family for support, seeking professional counseling or therapy, or engaging in self-care activities that help you feel grounded and centered.

Remember that you are not alone, and that there is help available to you as you navigate this difficult time.

[Asker]

I understand I'm allowed no contact
There was one incident after 20 years
I haven't had any contact in 3 weeks
After 4 weeks and I have no contact... That's just vindictive?

I have alcohol treatment assessment
And they want family there
She won't go along? Vindictive?

[Opinion Owner]

It is understandable that you may feel frustrated or hurt by the no contact order, especially if you feel that it is unnecessary or unfair. However, it is important to respect the order and not violate it, as that could result in legal consequences.

Regarding the alcohol treatment assessment, if it is required that family members attend, it may be worth discussing the situation with the treatment center or a legal professional to see if there are any alternatives or accommodations that can be made. If your wife is unwilling to attend, it may be helpful to communicate with her and try to understand her perspective and concerns. However, it is ultimately up to her whether or not she chooses to participate.

[KrakenAttackin]

No, you are fucked. She will use the 12 months to raid and pillage your assets. Don't even think about violating the order or she will have you thrown in jail, which will strengthen her case for still more of your assets. Also, she will start using the kids as weapons and the court will help her. Don't be surprised if she makes an accusation that you have been "abusing" her and "molesting" your children. This is a tactic designed to divide your energy and drain your cash. You will have to hire another attorney to fight the criminal charges and she will use just the accusation (that she made) in the civil court. This will double your legal fees (at least) and you may well end up in jail for several days.

She has all of the power. You will be left nearly penniless, fighting for the "right" to see your kids. You will be shell-shocked and potentially suicidal. The sooner you accept the totality of the situation the less painful the raping you are going to get will be.

Good luck and welcome to the revolution.

[DarkLegacy]

Lol absolutely spot on

[Asker]

You could be right
There is separate criminal proceedings
That starts in two weeks
She won't get on touch with me
When I ask the kids if she will get in touch the response is: she's not ready yet
I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt but I could be wrong

[KrakenAttackin]

Asker. I feel for you, don't be afraid to seek counseling, and don't do anything drastic. Overtime things will get better.

[Anemone978]

Depends on your wife...
Does she still love you and want to be with you? If not if you are paying for the house you should tell your lawyer and see what you can do..

[Asker]

In conversation with my sister she said she still loves me

I'm not allowed talk to her

Last I heard

She said

She was not ready to talk to me yet

That means it will happen in the near future?

[DarkLegacy]

A deplorable situation you find yourself in. But why the barring order after 20 years of marriage. We are in the era of female privilege and misandry. The justice system is institutionally sexist towards men.

[slatyb]

No, it's not. I expect she will file for divorce.

[Asker]

I think divorce is on the cards
Will that happen just as the 12 months is up?
I mean if I turn up at the door with my suitcase in 12 months time.. What will happen? Does the barring order get extended?

[slatyb]

I expect she will file for divorce before then and be granted occupancy until the hearing.