Should someone who had a history of cheating just keep it to themselves?

[Anonymous]

What people say, "once a cheater is always a cheater" not even considering that all people have room to change. Never mind the fact that their partners stayed loyal to them for more than 10 years but focus on how they once cheated as a teenager.

[Northernlight19]

"Once a cheater, always a cheater".

God I hate that stupid phrase.

In addition to being false it's counterproductive. Telling somebody who has done something wrong that they can't change disincentives people from working on themselves and fixing the issues that led them down a miserable and painful road in the first place.

People can and do change.

As for telling people about your past, it's up to you. Though I'd recommend discretion in whom you disclose sensitive information to.

[D_Bone_Steak]

I think the whole idea of getting someone to talk about their past is so they'll tell on themselves. Like if some chick is telling me she used to date 6 guys at once and cheated on her ex like she's proud of it... that might be fine in the "for fun only" category, but I'm not going to take her seriously.

[Finchie40]

Yes , in the beginning , if they finally realize in themselves that cheating is wrong period and tell themselves they will never cheat again, then yes it’s probably best to keep it to themselves as long as they are for sure not going to cheat again , But honesty is actually the best way to be when meeting someone new , if you can’t be honest with someone they aren’t going to be able to be honest with you , cuz how can you honestly love someone if you are completely lying to their face? So that is something you are going to have to consider if you want a long term relationship with someone , I wouldn’t t just come out and say I use to be a cheater but now I am not, but if the relationship seems to be going in the direction of true commitment and you really like to person you are dating , then you are best to speak the truth before making that commitment to someone so you aren’t keeping secrets you have to remember no one is perfect , we all pretty much did dumb shit when we were younger so what makes you a better person is being honest about yourself and being honest about your flaws that you learned was a big mistake to do to someone, Someone is going to have an easier time accepting your honestly over accepting your lies , always remember that

[Beatrix7]

av been told once a cheater always a cheater when it comes to love relashionships and help i have a heart of gold av been cheated on a few times they wait till i gain there trust nd show them how much i love them deep down then fk with my feelings its horrible and thats exactly why i wouldn't do it to my lover but a broke up with my ex a wile ago for cheating with a girl behind ny back and fking a one night stand aswel am happy alone with my freedom for a few years until am ready for another guy

[SeriouslyFunny00]

You're doomed if she has a lie detector test..

[Asker]

Im not talking about myself but you see, you actually kinda proved my point that there's no point telling them anything specially if you're only gonna look at one side of your partner.

[SeriouslyFunny00]

Haha yeah, but hey, if they ask about it just tell the truth. You will know if they will accept it or not.

[Asker]

I also wonder why women are so against paternity tests if they're not liars at all.

[Anonymous]

Your past is nobodies business but your own. Keep it to yourself, but don't repeat your mistakes in the future.

[Asker]

im not talking about myself but if the other partner asked? I guess lying is your preferred act then