Everyone says my boyfriend sucks but I don’t see it?

[Anonymous]

Literally all my friends and family dislike my boyfriend, they say he’s manipulative and a bully. But I really don’t see it, I’m in love with him. We’ve been going out for a year. He tells me they’re jealous of us, which could be true. He doesn’t want to be around them.

I’m afraid I’m going to have to choose between my boyfriend and my friends/family. What should I do?

Updates

+1 y

He also has ex-friends who said he’s an asshole or bully to his face. He said they are out to get him. I of course defended him and told them where to go, but how can everyone all be saying he’s not nice?

[Steelcore5280]

If there are a solid number of people who are saying the same thing, that he's an asshole, a bully, etc., then I'd personally have to heed their words, even if you don't wanna accept what they're saying. There is clearly some pattern going on here, and it's not a smart move to ignore it.

Also, pay attention to how he treats you/others. See how he acts when he thinks you're not around. Chances are, if many people are saying the same thing, the chances they're being honest is pretty high.

[Summeroflove]

They’re being judgmental and hateful. You shouldn’t let people talk shit about your boyfriend. You’re happy with him and he’s happy with you.


Maybe they’re jealous? Or maybe just because someone ain’t their type. Doesn’t mean he isn’t yours.

[Summeroflove]

Now? Why do they think that? Maybe he is if everyone says that but

[Daniela1982]

Oh please! And these people are the ones who post - My boyfriend sucks! How do I get out of this mess?"

[Summeroflove]

@Daniela1982 yeah if someone’s unhappy they need to break up. Not go behind their boyfriend or girlfriends back and say horrible stuff.

Not only for their own sake…. But for the person they’re stringing along and making think they actually love them. It’s sad. When they both could find someone who makes them happy

[Steelcore5280]

Do you have issues being able to recognize patterns? Because that's what your response sounds like. A concerning number of individuals are making similar criticisms of him. Someone who is rational should pay attention when you have patterns like this appear.

[Summeroflove]

@Steelcore5280 no I don’t and okay. I do notice a lot of people here type oddly the same

[Steelcore5280]

@Summeroflove I've actually been in a situation similar to this before. Was kinda getting serious with a woman who a number of people told me she overall was a pretty shitty person, and had several personality issues that were gonna be a problem down the road.

Later on, I was able to listen and see the red flags. Love is blind, which can be an issue. If she's having a similar situation as I did, it would be really wise to take a step back and analyze the situation, on her end.

[Summeroflove]

@Steelcore5280 you’re right. Sometimes people do see something before they do. If her friends and family are saying it it can be cause for concern.

I would need to know specifics to know what I think. But I’m sorry you gone through that

[Steelcore5280]

@Summeroflove if her family is saying similar things, she needs to really start taking their words seriously. If she trusts them and they are looking out for her best interests, their opinions should be considered the most valuable.

It's also whatever, I learned a lot of stuff from that. It still sucks, though. I wasted about five months on her 😂😂😂🤦

[Summeroflove]

@Steelcore5280 yes we learn from bad experiences and you can’t allow someone to treat you like that. There is MUCH better

[Steelcore5280]

@Summeroflove, that's exactly why I went and did the #DitchTheBitch

I'm glad I learned from it

[Summeroflove]

@Steelcore5280 yup that’s what you gotta do. No one sided, no abuse, or anything like that.

[Daniela1982]

That is because people are blinded by love and can't see - or accept - the truth. Never discount the opinion of family and friends who love you and want the best for you.

[purplepoppy]

When separate people all say the same thing about someone then its usually true. Especially if they don't hang out together.

[Anonymous]

Well if your family is saying it as well as your friends as well as an ex-friend of his they’re probably right. Your “love” for him may be what’s blinding you to who he truly is. I have a lot of female friends who date shit bags. They cry about things their man did or didn’t do, say he might be cheating. So then I point out the obvious but these women keep making excuses for their shitty behavior.

[Billlewis]

As long as he only bullies other guys, wimps, etc, I think that's actually quite sexy. Just imagine watching him slap some little wimp across the face, and make him kneel and kiss his shoes... I'm getting turned on just thinking about it... lol

[LazerBean]

Hormones can be blinding. But when everyone is saying the same thing about a person then it is definitely worth considering to be true

[FilmGuy93]

Yeah, go with your family. You don't see it because you're in love with him. If EVERYONE in your life is saying the same thing, it's because what they're saying is true.

[TheThingALing]

Do they say he sucks because of what you tell them when you mad at him but fakl to fill them In when he prince charming?

[shades777]

You know when your family is hating in you or happy for you either way its your choice

[Anonymous]

i try not talking to her friends and family anymore just to keep the peace between us because i know how they are and what they're like

[Opinion Owner]

i know how they are and after a while i just got sick of it that's why i stopped talking to them

[Anonymous]

Have you two gotten into an argument yet?