Why do I not feel happy with boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

Is it normal to not feel happy? To feel bored and a bit empty with your partner?

I love him I really do but I just feel completely and utterly bored when I'm with him. I feel like there's something missing in the relationship and I can't place what it is.

I don't want to break up with him or anything like that but I just want to stop feeling like this with him.

What can I do to stop feeling this way?

[RespectfulGuy]

Key point I use to answer: you love him. I assume he loves you too.

Life is actually quite boring. Eat, drink, work, fuck. The rest is sleep.

What makes life worth living is to appreciate the "little things" and be contented when having them.

Do you and him enjoy having a cuppa somewhere?

When you have sex, is it "just another fuck" or like eating chicken, two person sharing a bird is better than eating alone?

Get my point?

Assume you're in love, then contentment is key to find joy and moments of happiness along the mundane time of life.

Yes, don't expect unlimited and uninterrupted happiness. It's impossible here in earth. And there will be happiness, dotted on the brief time line of next 10 to 30 years.

These I assume, you're both in love with each other.

[amxshh]

Yessss it’s totally normal and my ex left me for the same reason and later she regret it , he is normal person like just your mom or dad , you should consider him close in this way , because you will get bored if you want a relationship out of routine.
I don’t recommend leaving him at all specially if you love him, if you want to do that, leave when you feel he’s not doing good and you are sure that you can have better person after him

[Asker]

Ok thanks!

[amxshh]

Welcome

[Sugar100]

Yes I’m feeling this way right now. 😞 boyfriend don’t do nothing serious don’t want live together only live with mom , no baby, not meet family. He deny go to trips vacation with me and is only going on trips with friends cousins family only.

I feel unhappy bored depressed.
Alone daily. Look like a single girl and he like single guy having vacation without me.

[Asker]

Oh man. I'm sorry. That's exactly how it is on my end as well. We don't live together and he doesn't want to at this point and I haven't met the family yet either. It just feels like we're single for the most part that just happen to sleep together from time to time.

[Sugar100]

Same girl same 😱😱😱😱😱

[slatyb]

What has changed since you met? Why are you bored? Are you wanting to do activities as a couple but he's not interested?

It doesn't matter what's normal. What matters is that you are unhappy and need something to change. What do you want him to do that he's not doing?

[Asker]

I'm not sure. He's a great boyfriend but I just feel like something is missing. I can't really place what it is but I know it's something that doesn't feel quite right.

[slatyb]

So what's happening? After you wanting to go do something but he doesn't? It's conversation lacking something? You may simply not be intellectually compatible.

[Asker]

Most of the time we're just asking each other questions back and forth like an interview in conversation so that could be why it feels so off. But he does that too probably because I don't talk much in conversation. It's not easy talking to him like it is my best friend. I don't know why that is.

[slatyb]

It sounds like you aren't really conversing. If you posted an exchange, maybe we could tell what's happening and why it's not working. In any case, this is not sustainable. You may both be perfectly fine people, but the relationship isn't working.

[BarryLiverstone]

Relationships take work. After the initial exciting stages you can enter a flat and boring phase. So what are you and him doing to work on your relationship and create more passion together? Who is putting in effort

[Asker]

We are both putting in effort I feel but I feel on my end that there is something missing. I just can't quite place what it is that's missing in the relationship. But I just feel like I shouldn't feel this way especially since our relationship is still quite new. We've only been together for a few short months and it was off and on. So really one month. We're also long distance. So it's not a traditional relationship.

[BarryLiverstone]

Oh it’s LDR. That’s part of it, and if you all are new then I’m not sure it can get much better unless you see each other irl. Do you have plans to be living closer?

[Asker]

No not at this time because it's still very new.

[BarryLiverstone]

And have you felt like this in other relationships?

[Asker]

This is my first real relationship

[BarryLiverstone]

Oh ok. Because you are over 30 thought you had previous relationships

[Asker]

No I'm a late bloomer.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Why not break up? Do you both a favor.

[Asker]

Because I love him and for the most part our relationship is great it's just I feel something is missing.

[BoopBoopBeep]

No it's not great, because you're not happy, you're codependent. You deserve to be happy, he deserves someone that is happy with him.