My boyfriend told me he isn't proud to have me because I have no work, is that a good reason? I am currently looking for a work and he said it now?

[Saddie_Girl]

[Singing_Hollow]

No its not but also if you are being productive in other ways while looking for a job then she has no reason to say something like that either. Tell him how it made you feel, maybe he had a bad day and didn't mean it. You can't base your whole relationship on one sentence. Look at everything you both deal with and if you find he degrades you and pushes you down more than he lifts you up, then leave.

[SnowedIn]

You're asking the wrong question.

End it with him now.

Any boyfriend who would say that isn't worth your time and doesn't deserve you.

Leave him.

[Saddie_Girl]

Thank you, I will.

[SnowedIn]

Like, I'm really sorry. The who situation sucks. But anyone who says they're not proud of you doesn't deserve to be with you.

[Saddie_Girl]

Yeah, I really thought of it. Despite whatever reason it is so rude to say it,,, thank you so much.

[Singing_Hollow]

Thats not fair to say. He could have said it out of stress or a bad day. You can't end things because someone lashes out. Its best to talk it out and see if they can come the reason why it happened and work from there

[SnowedIn]

@Singing_Hollow... you make great points. Here's my thinking: I don't see a statement like I'm not proud of you as a stress induced thing or a lash out. To me, that implies forethought and a fundamental look down on the other person. And that's my concern: that this wasn't a comment in a fight but a window into his view of her.

[Singing_Hollow]

You can't base one comment as the window of his view on her. You have to look at the whole relationship right. If this isn't the first time and he belittles her then yes she should leave but you have to look at the circumstances around it. It too easy to walk away due to emotions and this is also only one sided story. You can't base what she says happened as the truth. At the end of the day it is her relationship but Im just wondering if it could be solved and maybe he didn't mean it and said it out of anger. Men take on a lot of stress workwise and yes doesn't mean they should be mean but Id really thing about if this is the best solution on maybe we can talk to fix it.

[Avicenna]

Well, that’s an unkind way to put it, put most people want to date done one who’s working

[Saddie_Girl]

Yeah I understand, but its not like I have never worked in my life.. its just a phase now and thats how he is acting.. like really? Being distant to me in public just because he feels ashamed I have no work now?

[Avicenna]

Is he supporting you financially?

[Saddie_Girl]

Actually we live in together, but planning to leave him now. As of now its kinda yeah supporting me financially, not defending myself but just wanna say when he was at current position I didn't left him. Well maybe its my fault, should have left him there, I guess? And fyi, its not like I am doing nothing

[Avicenna]

OK, I think what is was was his bring frustrated at supporting you financially

[Saddie_Girl]

Yeah sadly his frustration impacted us.. not strong enough for us though because I understand him it isn't easy but luckily I did managed to get us through but he can't.

[Avicenna]

That’s too bad

[honestanswersonly_]

A relationship means your both a team. through good and bad. If he can't stand behind you when your down how are you gunna stand behind him when he's down

[Saddie_Girl]

Thank you, I am so down right now and he isn't helping

[honestanswersonly_]

Well you gotta do you

[Saddie_Girl]

And also, maybe its a sign that he isn't the one.. because I've been there in his downs and when he is in this phase but I didn't put him in a situation like he is putting me now... Getting ashamed to be with me because I have no work, its not forever and its not like I have never worked!

[honestanswersonly_]

Pee emm if you want to
Me. But ya if he's not there for you then you gotta look at the big picture

[honestanswersonly_]

Like dm me

[Saddie_Girl]

I still can't,

[honestanswersonly_]

Turn your settings off for msgs from people you domt follow to on

[Saddie_Girl]

I need more level to send a message, and also I already updated my settings

[honestanswersonly_]

Ok cool

[Bklynbadboy12]

Dump him he's a loser a real man would motivate you not say rude things to break you down

[Saddie_Girl]

Oh yes, thats what I am gonna do. Thank you!

[Bklynbadboy12]

Your so welcome

[boggboss]

A good reason for what

[Saddie_Girl]

Is me having no work for now a valid reason for him to be distant to me in public because he isn't proud I have no work.

[boggboss]

Nope

[BernaDemir]

thats so rude

[Saddie_Girl]

I am planning to break up on him because yeah its so rude

[GreenGold1992]

He sounds like a piece of shit

[In_Trance]

to him, it's a good enough reason

[Saddie_Girl]

Yeah right, well lucky for him I am not like him when he was in my position... But guess what! Eye opener, bye bye to him

[runnerboy]

That is way mean of him

[Wise4myage]

What's his problem?