Should I leave him?

[Anonymous]

i have a long distance 7 months relationship with my boyfriend. He’s Pakistani. I had been brought up in well educated open minded family which by means, my families never mind i hang out with my friends (males and females) as long as there’s boundaries and i never break their trust or do inappropriate stuff.

My boyfriend hate that. We started arguing and he yelled at me as he said i deserved that as i did mistake which is i invited my friends for dinner with my families and i went out with them the next day. I assured him several times nothing was happened between me and them. Unfortunately he doesn’t trust me. I tried and tried to talk and explained to but he shut me off.

[Anonymous]

I once dated a Pakistani guy for several months before my teacher who I was close with (and also that race) said I should leave him immediately. I hadn’t even given her info on him, she just said we are from two entirely different worlds and beliefs. She said those men can get violent, incredibly controlling and insecure. My teacher actually fled the country from her husband once he got abusive and had isolated her from her friends and family. That news shook me because I was only about 5-6 months in with the guy and already he was showing similar signs. So I left him, and I’m glad I did. So with that experience and what you’ve mentioned, I think you should do the same. It’s for the better.

[Asker]

thank you. For my whole life i never get yelled by anyone not even my parents. He kept saying i am such a cheap slut woman

[Opinion Owner]

That’s horrible, please leave that situation. He has no physical access to you yet with the distance, you should keep it that way. The guy I was dating was really good in the first 3 months, then his true colors started creeping in. We were LDR too by about 45 mins. I drove up to surprise him, we went to grab food. I forgot exactly what I had done but he got mad and grabbed my arm so hard a had a bruise. Of course he was very sorry and I tried to brush it off, but then I realized that’s how shit grows worse. Keep sweeping it under the rug soon enough you’re gonna trip over the mound.

[Asker]

It must be horrible experience for you. You deserve better. He didn’t allow me to work/talk/look at any mens. He treat me as his possession not as individual which break my heart. I have emotional attachment and we instantly “ click “ right away. I didn’t know i should trade my freedom for his love

[Asker]

He wants me to stay bound in house. He never like the idea of career women and keep reminding me women could never be like a man. Women is suppose to be home maker only

[Opinion Owner]

Honey that is not love, and the longer you stay it will be harder to leave. Emotional attachment makes it difficult to walk away but not impossible, so don’t trap yourself in a miserable, controlled, possible abusive relationship when there’s so many other men out there. I think if he actually lived here and you saw him regularly it would be complicated, but this is a man you only have a digital relationship with. You can do so so so much better, and find a man who treats you right, not disrespectful, doesn’t call you bad names. He is out there, I found mine almost two years ago and it makes me so grateful to god that I had the courage to leave the last guy. You can love him deeply but you must always value and love yourself more.

[_Maya_]

Yeah I'd dump him for sure. Can't hang out with friends? That's ridiculous and really controlling unless I'm misunderstanding something you said. If he is going to control who you see what else is he going to control or demand in the future? Think about that one. Maybe it's their culture but that is one that I could not get on board with no matter what. I have guy and girl friends and if my partner even suggested I couldn't hang out with any of them that would be end of relationship. Plus he doesn't trust you. That is not a good thing in a relationship. I'd run.

[Asker]

He threatens to kill himself and told me i trigger his depressions will all the fights we had

[_Maya_]

Tactics...

[boobliker]

have you seen him in the flesh yet or kissed him if not do as you please

[Asker]

We met once. He forced me to get to know his mother, his whole family & i ain’t ready for that.

[boobliker]

then give it up as you don't like it!

[RoseySarah]

Hurry break up!

Those guys are so crazy and violent! Heard so many horror stories of stuff like this!

You went out had fun if he can't trust you to that long distance imagine if you were married!

Trapped in the house no friends no family!

Run please run! My friend did this and the guy murdered her and her sister when she came to visit him.

[ButthurtGAGpeople1]

Yeah

[In_Trance]

yes you should

[Anonymous]

Typical