Why most of the teenage relationships don’t last?

[Anonymous]

[caring__1]

How can anyone make a choice without even knowing what they are choosing? The more experiences you have, the easier it is to determine if you are seeing compatible qualities or red flags. It takes experience to determine what works or doesn't work for you. Everyone is not alike, no matter how many people on this site insist all men or all women are alike. You may have a fantasy of what you'd like to experience, but until you actually experience it, you won't know whether it will truly work for you.

Let's say you fantasize about being the girlfriend of a rock star. You may believe it will be all glamorous and exciting, but are you prepared to deal with all the other girls willing to do anything to get close to your boyfriend? Until you experience it, you may just do your best to convince yourself everything will be beautiful. Reality comes from experience, and most teenagers don't have the experience to clearly see what actually exists.

Young love is very intense and blind. Great pain can be the result of being confronted with how reality differs from the fantasy. You want to blindly believe the other person, yet adolescents can be very self-focused, so what you want to see and what you actually see may differ. Also, adolescents tend to be fairly short-sighted, so, though it may feel good when it is new, they have no idea how to keep a relationship new and alive. This leads them to jump from one relationship to another as they confront their lack of knowledge.

[DaySpring]

No it doesn't. It takes thinking and discipline. They already have enough experience. You have to deal with human beings everyday of your life. People just don't think and it doesn't matter the age. Nearly no one has discipline. You can write a whole philosophy of relationships with no dating experience. The same problems teens have is the same problems anyone can have.

[caring__1]

@DaySpring Though you've been cooking all your life, will you consider yourself a cordon bleu chef on your first day of culinary school? Life is about learning. The more we learn from our experiences, the easier it is to choose effective solutions. I agree that many of the problems adolescents experience are also experienced by older people. The key differences tend to be adolescent's lack of experienced-based knowledge and the overwhelming intensity of first love. Insecurity and dysfunctional communication issues and self-centeredness remain fairly common at all ages.

[caring__1]

It sounds like you share minister Robert Fulghum's bible "All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten" www.goodreads.com/.../2399046-all-i-really-need-to-know-i-learned-in-kindergarten
If we already know all we need to know, we might as well just prepare to die, for life is about learning, not just putting in our time till we reach the end.

[DaySpring]

It's because most people, not just teens, don't think. You have a mom, dad, brother, sister, friend, teacher, bus driver, humanity. You have all the experience you need. If you sat down for a month and wrote down how to best make others feel good from your presence you'd know the answers. Yet that doesn't mean that you do it. Nor do adults do it. Why do relationships fail? Because people either never create a vision for their relationship and or they are out of harmony with it. Those are the only two ways a relationship can end. It's literally the same as goals. It's not rocket science. A 12 year old could figure this out. You could figure out how to deal with all the problems in a relationship if you sat down and just pondered. But most people, teens included, don't do that. Even if they did it they wouldn't know how to control their behavior and make what they need to make habit habit. But the answer is hidden in the first sentence I said. If you try to figure it out long enough it'll click.

[Rei13]

I am a completely different person now than I was when I was a teenager and some of the guys I really liked in HS either didn’t turn out so hot or we just went completely different directions in life. Can think of a few guys that were perfect to me when I was 14/15 but I wouldn’t touch with a 12ft pole now. Whenever you’re young your hormones are going crazy, really easy to fall in and out of love, you don’t know what life is outside of school is yet, or just how you’ll change etc.

[DaySpring]

Get off your high horse.

[Rei13]

@DaySpring I mean do you still want every girl you liked when you were young? I’m sure you went in a different direction than some too 😂

[Nikki1989]

Because they are teenagers. At that age, no one is relationship ready.

[Likes2drive]

No experience, just starting out, hard to actually pick the right one on the first shot and then there is the problem of wondering if someone is better out there and you won’t know unless you experience more

[DaySpring]

Na that ain't it. If you knew what you wanted you wouldn't be wondering if something is out there better. You don't need experience to know what you want nor how to date. A 12 year old could figure it out if they actually took the time to sit down everyday and think. But most of us, all of our lives, don't do that.

[Likes2drive]

@DaySpring they don’t have the maturity to make a decision like that at that age, we all have to grow up a bit before we really know ourselves to make a decision like that, it’s extremely rare for anybody to get married to their high school sweetheart that they were only with

[Iron_Man]

Because kids are involved they don’t know what they want. They’re trying to graduate from high school then they’re thinking about college or maybe going into the military they’re not ready for a wife at that young age

[Nifrayu]

Because they are emotionally immature and have an inexperienced understanding of interpersonal relationships.

[DaySpring]

They have plenty of experience. They have moms, dads, siblings, friends, teachers, the human race!!! They know how to treat others. They just don't think nor discipline themselves. They are emotionally fine. What they lack in discipline and that's something everyone has but few use. That immature stuff is a bunch of bs. It's all conditioning and culture. The culture at a middle school or hs is dumb. It's not because the kids are dumb or incapable

[Nifrayu]

@DaySpring how do you figure? They are teenagers.