Why do you think one loses friends once they get into a relationship or married?

[BrownSugar00]

[petitedollbabee]

Because you’re no longer prioritising your friends. I lost a lot of friends when I got into my relationship, because I stopped hanging out with them as often. Which is understandable and I don’t blame those friends for leaving.

[BrownSugar00]

That seems like a pretty common case in recent years. Do you miss your friends? Did you intentionally not want to hang out with them? Do you wish you could do things over?

[petitedollbabee]

Sometimes I miss those friends, but I don’t wish to change anything. I tend to heavily focus my time and energy onto one person at a time, so when I get into a relationship, my focus becomes my partner rather than a friend. I still have friends and a best friend who I talk to everyday, but I only hang out with friends maybe once a month compared to when I was single, I was hanging out with friends daily.

[BrownSugar00]

That's good that you socialize outside of your relationship. I highly encourage that! Its unhealthy to not have relationships outside of a romantic one. Do you think prioritizing your attention all on one person can lead to a downfall is something that's just as precious, too? Do you think spending too much time with one specific person, romantically, can often times get lonely, boring, routine?

[MrOracle]

Your SO tends to take up most of your formerly free time, so you have less time to devote to your friends.

Also, your priorities and lifestyles tend to also change, but many of your single friends will not, so you are no longer aligned and have trouble relating to each other. That's why married couples usually end up with other married couples as friends, and not so much free wheeling singles - their lifestyles and priorities are just too different.

[LiamSawyer]

There shouldn't be any loss of true friends with the exception of someone that was perhsps romantically interested in you (which you may notbof known about) and now knows it's an impossibility and needs to move on.

[BrownSugar00]

Do you think that a true friend would ditch or completely forget about their friend (s) once they start a romance with someone? Would a true friend do anything intentionally to end a friendship when they get into a relationship?

[LiamSawyer]

I wouldn't and don't understand why any really true friend would do that.

[Blueeyes81]

There is only so much time and your friends get less of it when you get into a relationship.

[BrownSugar00]

Have you personally experienced this? If so, would you mind explaining your side of things?

[Blueeyes81]

Yeah. I had a friend who was like my brother. We grew up together. About 27 or 28 he started dating a very clingy woman. She wanted all of his time. Every second. I went from spending 20 hours a week with the guy down to maybe 15 minutes a month. One day I just stopped putting in any effort as he was always canceling because she always needed him for something. It's been about 8 years since last I talked to him.

[BrownSugar00]

I'm so sorry that has happened to you? How did you feel then versus how you feel now about the loss of you friend/brother?

[Blueeyes81]

Then-I was angry.
Now- I'm happy for the guy. They married and had two kids but once I feel betrayed or cast aside then I'm done. He's pretty much just a stranger now.

[BrownSugar00]

Your reasons and feelings are completely valid.

I am in the same boat myself. I met this girl when I was 15 and she was 12, but we didn't meet again until a year later. We became friends from then on. I would always go over her house and she came over and slept over my house a couple of times. I would always sleep over her house and once for a week! Then 4 years later, COVID hit. Our contact became limited, as so did pretty much everyone's. But we were still friends. Then last year when I invited her to hang out, she told me that she had a boyfriend. She would text him during the time we would hang out and show me photos. I started to feel like our friendship was being neglected. She was always oblivious and kinda immature to things like this. The last time I hung out with her, I told her everything and expressed everything to her. I even told her that I'd be willing to dump her as a friend if nothing improves because I deserve more than how I'm being treated. Prior to this, a mutual friend of ours even said to my sister that when she tried to invite her to hang out, she said "No. I'd rather hang our with (him) than to go hiking with friends". We talked for 2-3 hours that day. Next time I saw her, she was h&h with her boyfriend. Right then and there, I silently dumped her. Deleted her number and unfollowed her. She's now engaged to someone 7 years older than her.

[dudeinohio]

The partners take a lot of each other's time, so outside friends are sort of pushed out.

[Slim57]

Because they don't care about their friends as much as their partner

[BrownSugar00]

Why do you think that this is the case?

[Slim57]

That's just what's acceptable to most people, relationships don't change much for me and my friends, I make time for both my partner and friends , but most aren't willing or their partner isn't

[BrownSugar00]

Do you think there needs to be a balance in order to have best of both worlds, otherwise you'll lose one over the other?

[Slim57]

Yeah definitely but most people can't do it I think

[BrownSugar00]

I think so to. Could it be that most lack the intelligence and maturity to do so?

[Slim57]

Could be, I think mainly in relationships one person is more in charge, guys let the girl do anything to get sex and the girls let the guys do anything for love I guess, with my relationships I've never liked being bossed around and my partners don't either so it's usually pretty equal where we're both doing what each other likes for the most part and not bossing each other around

[BrownSugar00]

Do you thibk that this is mostly common with females at a naive and inexperienced age and with men with insecurities?

[Slim57]

Yeah probably so

[007kingifrit]

all your male friends just wanted sex

[BrownSugar00]

This statement does not make any sense

[007kingifrit]

your male friends, they want sex more than they want friendship

[BrownSugar00]

That's still not an answer to the question

[007kingifrit]

yes it does, that's why you lost all your male friends, they weren't interested

[BrownSugar00]

What friends that are male that I have that I lost?

[007kingifrit]

you tell me?

[BrownSugar00]

You tell me because of your claims

[jahaims]

Lack of effort