Am I wrong for being mad when my boyfriend calls other girls cute?

[Anonymous]

So me and my boyfriend are in a Ldr we see each other quite a lot as we make a effort to travel but as you can tell ldr requires a lot of trust ,

usually I dont have a issue with trusting him , but today we were talking on the phone and i can't remember how the subject came around but he has a bestfriend and she likes girls (she also has a boyfriend )

and he before has called a girl cute infront of me (when he saw a picture of me and my friend ) i got a bit funny about this but i let it slide ,

in todays convo he was bacically saying he calls a girl cute not beacuse he likes them its not serious he was just saying but i am his girl and he would never replace me etc

and as much as that makes me feel better i still dont like it. he says when him and his best friend are in the car together (and yes he has a girl bestie 🫤 not sure how to feel) but he says she will point out a girl and they both say she is cute and she will talk about how nice her bum and stuff is as she likes girls ….

i understand its human nature we are all going to see someone and think they are pretty or cute but honestly i cannot stand it i think its the added fact that i am hundreds of miles away and it makes me very insecure and jel and doesn't help to build more trust AT ALL.

i can't stop you thinking someone else is pretty but ffs do you have to point it out?

some things are better left unsaid , I've read some peoples comments to claim they would rather have their man tell them they think a girl is cute rather than hide it but im stuck because both are shit

I also don’t want to do it back and call other men hot as I honestly don’t even look at other men like that , if I’m asked I can acknowledge if someone is good looking or not but I know I would just be saying it but I know I don’t really mean it but he does..

I don’t want to seem like the controlling type and be weird but am I right for thinking this and getting annoyed about this?

[Kaneki05]

Here's why this worrying makes no sense. If he could cheat and was willing to there would be no reason to actually keep you as a LDR. That's the most easiest thing to break off so what reason at all would he have to pretend your still together if he knows he has someone else.
Realistically all he has to do is say hey look this LDR ain't working out or could be even worse just block you and problem solved he can be with another girl. He would be one massive asshole but the point is that's what he would do if he had another girl pretty sure.
He would just come up with some excuse to get rid of you. The fact he hasn't means he ain't cheating.

And I don't see any problem with calling other people etc. What is one supposed to do lie? But then you want your SO to lie? And if so how's that not a slippery slop to the exact thing your worried about?
I'm very honest about not been blind and still finding other girls hot but that is not the same as saying I would replace you with someone else.

Each guy is different but the guy sounds like me and I wouldn't cheat. And then logically if he was, he wouldn't need to be with you anymore therefore you wouldn't be so.

[Asker]

This makes so much sense to me , thankyou for this I just needed some people to put it in perspective for me

[Kaneki05]

This is the most important point, when your partner can't tell you something that's when something is up. That's when the relationship has took a turn and ain't going somewhere good.
Your partners, your supposed to have trust you can say your thoughts around them cause if not who else?

This is not to say you can't feel jealous because that's normal and you probably will. Nothing wrong with that. But that will decrease naturally overtime, and still ain't a reason your partner shouldn't able to openly tell you things.

[Kaneki05]

There are some people who say, oh I would never tell my partner that but would tell my friend and I have always just looked at them like what?
Your partner should everything they are your bestie as well.

[Kaneki05]

Know*

[Anonymous]

I can see how that would make you feel insecure. But for one it’s an LDR, he could easily cheat if he wanted to. Second, cute to men sometimes refers to her in a little girl way. Like I may say something like that about a younger girl, not in a sexual way but maybe as a father. Like oh she’s so cute, maybe even she’s so pretty. Doesn’t mean I’m thinking of her sexually. Sometimes my girl may think some girl is gorgeous, to me I think she’s ok. So I may just say she’s cute, not to be mean. Now if he was saying damn she’s hot, damn she’s sexy af, definitely different. Even then it’s an LDR he could easily cheat if he wanted to, or even just tell you this isn’t working for me we need to go our separate ways.

[IslaTheWitch]

In the moment when you started the relationship other women didn't disappear. They are still here. They have looks and some of them will look interesting for your boyfriend. And it's totally normal. His eyes and brain didn't stop to work.

But you know? Other men also still exist. So enjoy your life looking on nice faces and bodies when you have someone who loves you.

[Billlewis]

No -- he shouldn't be doing that, because it's disrespectful.

[boobliker]

yes, us boys are looking all the time point nice girls out to him he will think on it then, also ask if i am cute?

[Anonymous]

You wanna talk about insecure try having the woman you love with all of your heart and soul of 6 years get engaged to another guy while you're battling cancer

[In_Trance]

is it really that big of a deal?

[Asker]

I don’t know.. I feel like it is but maybe I’m just overreacting?

[In_Trance]

So talk to him about it and tell him how you feel. If he doesn't respect that and it really is that big of deal to you, you need to make a decision

[AnnieSW]

Its strange but I know other guys do it