I'm too broke. Should I break up with my girlfriend?

Question

I work a full time job and i can barely afford rent and food. in fact some days i go eating only once to make it through the month. i can't afford to take my girlfriend out to dates like other men do. i don't want her to put up with my inherited broke-ness and everything that comes with it. if she gets bored of not being taken on dates, i won't be surprised if she dumps me and finds someone, who will. I know she's bored and we're not able to be doing those exciting or romantic things, that have to have a price tag.

What was that? I should simply stop being broke?

I tried. getting a 2nd job is not available where i am. Those employers and contractors don't like to see that. They say they want workers with full commitment. my side hustle is in the works but it's a slow process, that i am committed to. it may take off or it may crash but that's where i invested a good amount of money and time to see if it works. I don't have faith in those crappy regular jobs.

Im too broke. Should I break up with my girlfriend?

lightbulb27 · Accepted Answer

sometimes... a goof girlfriend will make you more successful. with her, can you get your way out of the rut, working together, but getting your skills, networking and such to a better place? if so, stick with her.

If she's a drag that just sucks you dry and gives nothing to motivating and helping you get to a better place, then yes. Ships have anchors ya know... they also have motors!

The really hard part here... is vulnerability. It is really hard being a guy, being open and vulnerable about these issues and the girls... they want in to all that emotion. They like to influence and control, and some may be very hurtful about it too. If they are not mature, it could be super painful you haven't experienced yet.

So I'd suggest testing the waters with this with her, seeing how she responds... if she's creative, problem solving. I and I know others that are much better for our girlfriends and wives. Maybe you have a good one.

Relationships do take time and energy... and then surprise sometimes... babys show up, taking more energy. If you aren't' ready for that emotionally, consider getting yourself stable first.

It's your call.

Welcome to adulthood! I pray you'll be ok. Oh yea, go to church, pray to God and Jesus, get strength together. Sometimes it helps.

RingOfFire · Accepted Answer

Here's the thing. Women want a provider. They want a man who can bring home the bacon. You don't necessarily have to HAVE the bacon right now but she needs to see that you care about improving your situation so that you WILL be bringing it home after some reasonable amount of time in the future.

Are you doing that? I'm not so sure from what you said. Particularly the last sentence: "I don't have faith in those crappy regular jobs."

If that means you are ruling out taking a "regular job," that's a problem. You shouldn't be ruling out ANYTHING if you are struggling to make ends meet. This side hustle might be good OR it might be a pie in the sky. When you say it will take a long time to pay off, it kind of sounds like you are not so sure about it. And that's not good.

You need to let her know that you are doing everything possible to better your ability to provide... could mean training for a completely different career... getting a better education... whatever it takes. If she thinks you are committed and sincere about it, and also realistic about it, that might be all she needs.

LazerBean · Accepted Answer

I would say just ask her if she cares that you're broke and decide after that. If she actually likes you and she's a future with you then she's not going to care. Then take her out to do other stuff that isn't expensive. Hiking, picnics, etc... my husband used to come over to my parents house all the time before we were married and we would just hang out or do something chill like paint rocks. It was fun.

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

Everyone deserves love and companionship (well, almost everyone). Don't break up with her because you think she can do better. Lots of females don't feel this way. They love the man for who he is, not what he has.

AviatorTom · Answer

In your situation, any decision to break up should be mutual. Talk with her about how you feel, that you don't think it's fair for her to get stuck with a "broke" guy. She may be okay with that, especially if she really cares for you.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

Talk to her. If she likes you, not your money, I can't see any problem.

I had such a discussion here on g@g some time ago. People are different. Don't base on generalizations, or you can hurt someone or yourself.

Not every girl. Not even the majority of girls look for a wealthy partner. We treasure the emotional connection more. And we are smart enough to work and pursue our careers.

So, talk to her, get yo know her better, share your struggles, listen to what she wants to share. Be a real couple. Solve your problems together.

bobalife · Answer

Maybe you’re feeling insecure and self-sabotaging.. it’s okay to ask her how does she feel and think. We all gonna go through some phases with challenges in our lives and it’s important to have a partner who will stick it through while we worked on those obstacles.

Anonymous · Answer

Are you looking for an excuse to break up with her? Sounds like it. You don't need an excuse, if you don't like her anymore then move on and let her find someone into her.

In a mutually respectful relationship that favours equality, she should be contributing to your shared costs like dates. Living together can also lessen the burden on couples where you split things down the line.

In a mutually respectful relationship that favours equity, you both contribute relative to your income. So, if you want to go to France and it is $10k for the holiday and you earn three times as much as her, then you put up $7.5k and she $1.5k. Make sense?

In an exploitative relationship that favours misandry, you cover the cost of everything and she freeloads. So, if you go on dates or live together, then you will have to pay for everything while she saves all her money to spend on herself and/or spends your money on herself too.

LadyKitty · Answer

What kind of logic is that? Break up because you are broke? No. Skill up for a better job rather than getting two jobs. You should both aim to take care of each other though this just sounds like your trying to come up with an excuse to leave.

AnusNdaPainus · Answer

Get a financial advisor a lot of the time actually for most people even really rich people the income isn’t the problem it’s not monitoring your spending you need better financial literacy and discipline but if she leaves you for that you didn’t have any business with a woman like her anyways

God filled this world with women don’t get so attached especially to one who would leave you over such a petty reason

social media has fooled our generation into thinking we should be further ahead in life dude we are still in our twenties as long as you keep working I promise it’ll pay off Learn a skill while you’re young

itsannalee · Answer

Ask her and explain what you feel to her…

Someone who love you will always be your side. Personally i won’t leave my boyfriend even though he is broke as long as he is hard working person and always responsible with what he does.

Now my boyfriend also kinda broke…
But when i met him, he has everything, drives fancy car. etc

But coz his business was down, he lost almost everything. But i still in his back, i support him. I offered him some money several times but he didn’t take it. I don’t have that much but i will always support him.

EmyyWolf · Answer

Don’t leave her man. She’s gonna think it’s because of her. Just stay put, tell her your situation. Tell her your spot, and if she doesn’t care, just stay. WTF.

I was with a broke BWF, he’s now a boss, he’s literally owner of a business. I never left him because he was living with his mother.

TenderFantasy · Answer

If my man broke up with me just because he didn't have any money, I'd feel hurt. It's not my fault he's broke. But you do you I guess. I think my ex did this to me and money was part of the reason why.

Money shouldn't make or break a good relationship. A good partner is harder to find than money any day.

JTPeterson · Answer

In a relationship it shouldn’t be about money, and if she breaks up with you than you deserve better but don’t give up on her she is with you still for a reason just keep proving that even though you have no money that you are still a good guy and that you can and will be the best guy for her in the long run

ISFPCaramelPrincess · Answer

I would tell her the truth. Maybe you’ll both have to work and help each other out that’s okay. And just because you can’t find a good job now that doesn’t mean that you never will. Don’t feel bad in reality most of us are broke this economy sucks ass. Many people are struggling. By the way amazon delivery pays very good

Joshydavid25 · Answer

No, unless she has specific expressed that she's bored with you being broke.. You can actually do plenty of things that are cost saving.. Maybe go out on picnics, do some fun outside activities, go to the movies every once and a while.. Just talk to her about it really.. If she wants to break up with you while you're down, and trying to get back up.. She ain't the one..

Anonymous · Answer

Man, if you get along well and you're meant to be together this is no a reason to break up. My boyfriend and I are college students, we depend on our parents and have little money, but dates are not about spending money all the time, it's about spending time together, that's what this is about, we love being together and that's what our dates are for, go for a walk, have a sleepover, cook a simple meal together, play games, being broke doesn't mean you have to end a healthy relationship.

AmeriRiver096 · Answer

I understand it can be challenging. Open communication with your girlfriend is crucial. Discuss your concerns, explore solutions together, and make decisions as a team. Remember, a strong relationship involves working through challenges together.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

Communicate your financial hardships with her. Obviously this means gifts have to stop.

If that’s a deal breaker for her, she isn’t worth marrying. A woman should be with you because she loves you, not your income. Your income should be a “bonus”

NalleBabyBoysss · Answer

Your very insecure it's 2024 why can't your girlfriend take you out for dinner if you have a low income? And i don't see how your low income affect you being in love with your girlfriend, do you think she's only dating you for your money?

MsBell2018 · Answer

There are plenty of dating things you can do that don't cost $. Your time is free. Walks, holding hands. massages, reading poetry, watching tv/movies together, pick her a dandelion, etc
Most women want their man's time, attention & affection

LiamJHayden · Answer

That is a defeatist attitude. She is with you, not someone else. Just enjoy it while working on trying to improve your station in life.

Also dates do not have to be expensive. A simple picnic and flying kites can be a fun day.

joehypo1 · Answer

If she has not left yet she must be into you i would not ruin that I have been in your shoes i met my girl when i was having my house reposessed and no job and we stayed together for almost 20 years

Dinklex3 · Answer

I mean.. you could communicate your concerns and have a conversation with her about your insecurities … But if that’s not your thing… sure. Break up with her 💁‍♀️

I'm too broke. Should I break up with my girlfriend?

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