I don't know what to do anymore?

[Anonymous]

I have been in a relationship with an Ukrainian guy for some years now, he would come to visit me lot of times during the year (I live in France)
everything went too smooth and good
we were certain that we want to spend our lives together and he eventually proposed to me
but all changed when the war came
I mainly didn't want him to go, we argued a lot
we almost broke apart but he was too stubborn and went to the war anyway
we stayed in contact and he is as loving as ever
few months back he had a near death experience which resulted in amputation of his hand
he ghosted me for days after telling me about incident then he grew colder and more distant
he isn't as loving or as gentle as how he used to be
the previous night we were on a call and he started to yell at me just because I asked him more than one question about his well being
he called me a bad name
and today he just got mad at me again for nothing
what should I do
I love him truly and don't want to give on him

[Anonymous]

Wars can do terrible things to people. It changes them and gives them a lot of trauma's. I think he has diffiulties with his health/wellbeing and doesn't seem to know how to handle it. And you asking about it might give him stress. Its already so hard on him to see what happens in his country due to the war/invasion.

[Asker]

I understand it's hard but he isn't letting me help him
he isn't approachable anymore
whenever I try to help or talk about it he just gets mad

[nawtee_me]

War changes people and I would have expected him to go back. It is the right thing to do and you not understanding that may have something to do with it too.

[Asker]

I am trying

[nawtee_me]

I understand, loving him and not wanting anything to happen to him is normal. Running into war is not normal unless it is your family being killed because of it.

[Asker]

he has family there so yes they were in danger