What do you do when you run into an ex?

Question

Do you talk to them? Ignore them? Give them the finger?

WhiteSteve · Accepted Answer

I don’t have a ton of true “exes” that I had serious relationships with, I’ve more had temporary flings bookended by serious multi-year relationships. I did the Van Wilder thing for most of my 20s, lmfao, and I ended up with a lot of exploding situations where the girl would graduating and moving away, which was actually very smooth, haha. It just was never going to go anywhere, so it never had to be more than what it was.

So…. more often than not, the hourglass just ran out, you’d have one last night with her before she moved, you’d say your goodbyes, and that would be that. Summers could be DRY, haha, the town cleared out. Parking downtown was a breeze though😝

I think only a few of them ended in an icy manner, and there was never anything too crazy involved. I guess one chick I did a little bit dirty, but I only knew her for like six days and she was NUTS, lmao. She was one of the ones I did see again. And I’m walking around with my head in the clouds as usual, and I just greeted her like anyone I hadn’t seen in a while. She wasn’t having it though😂 She was very short and didn’t want any part of my small talk.

Today-me would see this as a cue to maybe apologize for how things went, but young-me was too clueless, haha. Although, to be fair, the explanation was “you came along in this wicked tight window of time when I thought this significantly hotter girl wasn’t going to pan out, you were EXTREMELY sexually aggressive and just cute enough that I shrugged and said to myself “ehh…what the hell…”, then literally a day or two after that the hotter chick DID pan out, then you called me saying you bought us tickets for Kanye West that weekend, and then the hotter girl said she was going to the same show, so…. I just had to bail out altogether. Should’ve handled it better, and I’m sorry.” Some apologies are maybe better left unsaid😅 I think her floormate also saw me at a party with a third girl I hooked up with in between all this too…. not my usual deal, I swear, I was just absolutely on fire that week, lmfao. Where were they in the summer?😂

Honestly, the worst one was later that year and I was working at Hollister, where my first day I was relentlessly getting hit on by this one crazy chick who I was NOT feelin’. But she was gone the first week or two, so time marched on, and fast forward to this other coworker I was talking to…. some girl comes strolling in, chubby with glasses, and she’s talking to me like she knows me. I’m like “oh my god, it’s the crazy chick, she’s back…”😱 I’m just trying to play her a little cold, not rude, but not super engaging. Then another girl comes up in a jacket from some high school on the other side of the state, and she introduces her. Then it hits me…. that high school is the same high school my first serious girlfriend’s sister went to. Listening a little more, I realize…. this is my ex I’m talking to, and she’s unrecognizable to me, maybe three or four years later. I try to recover, and I think I played it off. But I was SHOCKED. She had had a baby somewhat recently, and hadn’t lost the weight, plus the glasses…. just didn’t look like the girl I used to know, not even being mean, just factual.

So, whatever, no big deal. But I do talk to my mom after that, and they were close when we dated, so I told her I saw her. I did mention that she had put on a good deal of weight. She asked what I thought she weighed, I said “idk….180 pounds?” (Way off, I’m an idiot, she was 5’3, lmfao) I’d never say this to anyone one else, but obviously I’d share this in confidence with my mom.

So…. the next day I come home to a message on my answering machine (it’s like 2004, lmao)…. it’s my ex. “I DON’T WEIGH 180 POUNDS.” *HARD click*

My mother —MY MOTHER— called my ex and told her what I had said, because “she was concerned about her.”🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️ My mother —a WOMAN, who presumably knows how sensitive of a subject weight is for women, especially post-baby— told another woman that her ex thought she looked obese when he saw her. I just…. what do I even say to that? So needless to say, that was very awkward, especially after she saw me with a new girl I was clearly having a flirty exchange with who was quite easy to look at. I felt pretty terrible about all that. Never got a good explanation from mom on what the hell she was thinking there, lmfao

Otherwise, though…. I’m all about keeping it classy and drama free. We’re going to date more than one person in life, probably, so almost all relationships will end, and you just have to be able to either “say something nice or say nothing at all.” No need for additional drama, it’s over.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Depends on which ex. Depends on how the break up went down

For most of them the best thing to do is the bare minimum. Acknowledge them, smile courteously, say hello and go about your day. No need to get in a long conversation. Act like it’s no big deal. Yes it might shake you up a bit depending on who it is. But honestly that’s the best way to handle it

But also completely ignoring them like they are invisible isn’t good either. That can come off as disrespect to some people and make a bad situation actually get worse. Also some exes would be actually pleased to see you get upset. It lets them know that you are still thinking about them.

Anyway I was late to the game on all this. I didn’t get into real committed relationships until later in life. I’m embarrassed to admit how I old i was when I got my first REAL girlfriend and not just a hook up or a fling.

I wish to God I could have handled some exes differently. I know everybody feels that time to time. But most of the time I was caught completely off guard when things went south. This is the advantage of dumping someone vs having them dump you. When you break up with someone you are ready to accept the “new normal” without the person. In my opinion that’s worth the guilt.

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Accepted Answer

I hope I will not run into him ever.

We saw each other in very romantic circumstances. In an airport, He was kissing me passionately, on my lips and everywhere on my face, kissing my teary eyes, he also had his eyes teary but was telling me not to worry, we’d meet each other soon and that, if I couldn’t manage coming back, he’d find a way to come to me. He said he loved me and I was almost late on a plane, because he couldn’t let my lips go.

We have never seen each other again and judging on the circumstances how we last saw each other and how we failed to reunite during pandemic, even though we relentlessly tried for two years, I think seeing him somewhere randomly - Would cause tears in my eyes and I haven’t had tears for a very long time.

I don’t want to have them again ever, not because of sadness of a lost love.

I want to have tears of happiness in future.

I hope, I will never ever see him again, but I also hope - wherever he is, he’ll be happy, because I loved him so much. I really loved him so much, it makes me cry to remember. He was my world.

And it would be painful to ever come across to him again. I want to remember him the way I last saw him.

Beckybooboo · Accepted Answer

It only happened once and the pain was unbearable. We had been together for two years and just kind of grew apart. There wasn’t any anger or screaming when we ended it, it was just a solemn day of me packing while he was working and leaving. Three months later I saw him at an outdoor festival. I was happy he wasn’t with a girl lol but I just felt sad. He didn’t see me. I ended going into the bathroom and cried a little and ended up leaving shortly after. Luckily my friends understood the situation.

Okayokkk · Answer

Ignore.

Last time I bumped into my ex i was eating at a cafe. I didn’t see him he just came from behind me. Slapped $20 on the table and said “get yourself some food kid” LOL. I was like “wtf...” and my heart started racing (he was a terrible person.) He said “bye (my name)” across the cafe and everyone was looking at me. I just pretended not to hear him. he is so weird. thanks for the 20 though jerk.

MiddleAgedClimbee · Answer

I don't think either of have ever encountered any of our exes. I received an email from one of mine a couple of years ago. She's married with four or five kids or something and she was just wondering how our life was going.
I think my wife and I have been together so long now that time would soften any hard feelings that could have been harbored.
I recall running into an ex girlfriend right before I met my wife, and I think we just small talked for a minute and went on our way.

Sirenboobzilla · Answer

Depends on the ex. Some have ended on good terms where we still talk and have an amicable relationship. Others have ended on ok terms and the few times we come across eachother I'll be courteous and polite and say hi, might talk for a minute or 2, then move on. And then there's the shit bags that you just avoid eye contact with

IslaTheWitch · Answer

We greet each other and sometimes crack a joke. It depends on when and how we meet... Not always time allows for a catchup.

The funny thing... When my mom passed away, my ex helped me a lot. Saying we had a very unhealthy relationship is a fucking understatement :D But we both remembered only good stuff. We talked about happy moments. He made me smile through tears. He was there for me. He made things happen.

Wallythewalrus2 · Answer

It’s only happened to me twice, I ran into one of my exes at a Chinese restaurant. We had only been broken up for about a month, so we didn’t say anything, just kind of looked at each other. It was actually really hard seeing her. The second time was at the grocery store, we hadn’t seen each other for over a year. It was actually nice, we talked briefly and she even Hugged me.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

In my case, if she says hello i'll reply just by hello and continue my walk and i prefer to never see her and if i did from a long distance, i'll try to change my direction...
I guess it depends between a person and another and the causes which made them separate from each other...

Inbox · Answer

I’d ignore her, but would say hello if we were put into a situation where we would have to say hi, but I’d keep the conversation positive, light, and very short (assuming we ended on good terms).

It’s funny you asked this question because I’m probably going to be running into my ex in March on campus and she’s going to see how I’ve gone Super Saiyan with my ability to approach girls - even groups of them now muhahahaha!

LaurenM1997 · Answer

I’ve seen him from a distance once in the car I realised it was him I looked the other way and just ignored the fact that I seen him lol it does suck when you see your ex I never have talked to him since we broke up

Somoneelse · Answer

Even though I see that chance very low due to long-distance. I woukd just behave casual. Not too friendly but also not hostile either, just normal. We went from stangers to friends to lovers to just acquaintances and now not talking since last oktober. And I see no problem in being that way.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

Drop a shoulder and drive with your legs, not your back. No, joking aside, I still talk to several of mine. Say hi, wish them well, be on my way.

CalmUntilAbused · Answer

You mean with my car, right? Oh, but in all seriousness, I would just ignore that person. The only case when I would be the one to initiate a breakup would be if she cheated on me, so it would still make her unworthy of my time.

AydenHazor · Answer

Depends on the ex. Emotionally and verbally abusive ex wife I only interact with regarding our son. Every other ex in either still friends with or at least amicable toward and would probably chat with

KillinItHard · Answer

Typically just go about my day. If they wave or say hi to be friendly, I'll reciprocate but I usually just don't acknowledge and move on. My city isn't that big so it happens.

puurikke · Answer

I'd say hi. My exes are my exes, they are not my nemesis nor are they 'dead to me'. I won't call them, but if I bump up to them on the streets I ask them how they are and we have a nice (but short) conversation.

exitseven · Answer

I look them right in the eye and just try to walk away.

dolemite58 · Answer

Depends on the ex, some im happy to see and hope they’re doing well. Others I have to avert eye contact and go down another aisle, happened to me not that long ago at target 😒

Sameone · Answer

For me i don't have ex or girlfriend so it's depends how are relationship end
Example if get bad i will just say hi few minutes and i go
If was okay if she accepte we can be friends no problem for me 😇

MikeTheBartender · Answer

Usually just a polite hello or wave, or cheers a drink. Now... If it's one of the crazies... I exit... Cordially... If it's the craziest... I RUN LIKE A BAT OUT OF HELL!!!

Anonymous · Answer

It happened once, I just smiled and walked away.

Nikki1989 · Answer

I am good friends with all my exes except one.

Samantha36 · Answer

Usually say hi. Maybe stop for a quick chat. My partner is ok with it.

worldscolide · Answer

My current ex? Run the fuck away.. No joke I changed my name and moved cities because of her abusive ass.

Elena_Stewart · Answer

Never happened, but if it happens will say hello and keep walking.

Slim57 · Answer

Ignore them, maybe unintentionally give them the dirtiest look ever lol

loveslongnails · Answer

That depends if you're on speaking terms or not.

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

IM CURRENTLY PLANNING FOR THAT SITUATION AS WE SPEAK... I've BEEN OBSESSED WITH A GIRL FOR YEARS NOW. I can't SEEM TO MOVE ON. IM EXPECTING TO SEE HER AGAIN AT A CONCERT EVENTUALLY. IM PLANNING TO OVERDOSE IN FRONT OF HER. IM CURRENTLY STOCKPILING THE NESICARRY MATERIALS. THE POINT IS TO MAKE SURE SHE UNDERSTANDS THIS WAS HER FAULT. WISH ME LUCK.

IloveWinters · Answer

I would talk to them and wish them a good day

Curiousmike11 · Answer

Oh 100% give them the finger! Ex for a reason

Yellovv · Answer

I don't run them back if is finish that's finish to me..

Date_a_Snob · Answer

depends on the ex... it could range from range polite conversation, outright ignoring them or even a hook up (I regret sleeping with my ex)

Makro00 · Answer

I try to have a conversation.

Becky316 · Answer

It would depend on which ex

Grond21 · Answer

Luckily I don't have one.

Kinkyhubby · Answer

It depends on the ex.

Charliefretz329 · Answer

Ignore and leave the area.

LunarEclipse433 · Answer

Back up and run into them again. LOL!!!

nawtee_me · Answer

Say hello, still friends….

Nice222 · Answer

I say hi and keep moving.

MrZameer · Answer

Pass her gracefully

laly520 · Answer

keep on walking

Jennz6 · Answer

Ignore him

LavLavLuv · Answer

Ignore 100%

Nahid1707 · Answer

So awkward

BigBootyKay · Answer

Say hi

JonesT10Apr · Answer

no I'm not

Dee198989 · Answer

Talk

Zestyassmf1997 · Answer

Rub out of them.

Cheerfull009 · Answer

Abuse them

What do you do when you run into an ex?

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