Girlfriend moving in?

[StraightGuy998]

Me and my girlfriend have been talking about her moving in when her lease on her apartment ends (I own my own home). The only thing is she has a cat that at her place will pee and poop anywhere in the house despite having a litter box (he has also done it on the stove). How do I have the conversation of not wanting to have the cat indoors?

[Oliverlogan263]

Bro, moving in together is a big step, and not allowing the cat inside is totally reasonable too. Here's how I'd approach it:

Have an honest but kind conversation with your girl. Explain your concerns about the cat's behavior specifically - the stove thing is not cool! Stress it's nothing personal against the furball.

Ask how open she is to training or rehoming. Some cats just aren't cut out for indoor life. See if she'd consider keeping him outdoors, with a sheltered area of course.

Compromise is key. What if the cat's only allowed in your bedroom/bath? Or you build an enclosed catio? Shows you're willing to meet in the middle.

Assure her it doesn't change how you feel about her. This is just about what works best for your shared home long term.

Offer to help research options/trainers if keeping the cat is super important to her. But stick to your boundary if indoor issues can't be resolved.

Hopefully she understands. Just be chill about it and you guys will figure out the best solution together. Keep me posted, bro!

[melnc]

Start a conversation with a joke about cats and slowly turn a little serious then... tell her what you want. I'm sure she'll understand

[Anonymous]

You need to have a straightforward conversation about this and be firm. She needs to figure out a way to encourage the cat to use the litter box, or she can’t live with you. Period.
There may be different things about the litter box that the cat is being finicky about; the texture or smell of the litter, whether or not the box is confining, location, too small or too deep, etc. All things your girlfriend needs to figure out before she moves in with you.

[Zestyassmf1997]

You gotta be frank about it, and firm too. It’s your place.

[laly520]

just talk to her about it

[butterly248]

Just be honest and Google is your new BFF!