Girls would you accept a post break-up proposal from your ex boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

This is regarding my older sister. Her ex boyfriend came after a week after she broke up. Meanwhile it's sweet he came to his senses, came to apologize and propose, my sister is still hurt. He promised to have the wedding expedited within 2 months later.

She's wondering why he wouldn't propose all those 7 years into the relationship and why only after she left him. She's wondering how much longer would she have waited if she didn't break up. She also feels like this is a forced marriage where he'll end up resenting her. She's not done processing all this. She accepted it but isn't sure about proceeding with the wedding too soon and is still hurt. Do you think she should just let it go and follow through it (forgive and forget)? Girls if that was you and your ex boyfriend came back apologizing and proposing, would you accept it or not?

Yes, he still proposed after all, a proposal is a proposal

No, I don't want it anymore; I would feel it was forced

Other

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Your sister knows that ring was a “Please don’t leave me” ring. He had no desire to change their relationship until it came to a point where she wouldn’t stay if he didn’t. It’s emotionally equivalent to a “shut up” ring that men get their partners who tell them they want to get married when the man might not want to. Honestly, the fact that it was a 7 year relationship period and there was no marriage in sight until she threatened to move on and find someone better says a lot about who he is. I don’t know that he’ll come to resent her, but I imagine he’ll come to regret it. He likely has terrible self-esteem and he’s settling for her because he doesn’t think his ideal partner would want him if she even exists. He just doesn’t want to risk being alone so he’s clinging to your sister, which I imagine is the first woman who’s stuck with him for so long. He doesn’t know how to process being alone, so he begs her to stay instead. It won’t be a bad marriage necessarily, but it won’t be an exceptionally happy one unless he goes above and beyond to fix who he is as a person.

[Asker]

yeah that's pretty much it. Though she did said he sounded sincere in his apology and seems full of regret. He made propose to gain her trust back, to be a better man, to just give him this last chance. So while she accepted his proposal, she isn't too excited about a wedding too soon.

[Anonymous]

After 7 years, it sounds like a shut up ring. She’s probably given him an ultimatum in the past and now that she’s left him it’s almost as if he’s like “ok here, damn. Fine”. He doesn’t want to start over with a new woman and lose the perks of having on until the next one is found. It’s too daunting and he’s gotten used to your sister. If I were her, I wouldn’t accept the ring but at the end of the day it’s her choice. All you can do is support her should he hurt her again.

[Asker]

Yes, off course. I'll be there to support her; that's what good friends are there for. She said he apologized and promised to make it up to her, to change for the better. She said he sounded sincere but she feels it's too soon a wedding at this moment. She wouldn't been happy to marry him if he had proposed much earlier but now she doesn't seem to excited anymore.

[Opinion Owner]

It should’ve never taken him 7 years to propose and I think deep down she knows that too. It would be great if she rid herself of such a man but I know it’s hard when you love someone. Praying for your sister and that he does right for her this time. If she’s a good, kind hearted woman then she deserves no less than an amazing man.

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the stormy seas of love and breakups, it sounds like your sister's ex is trying to anchor down with a grand gesture! But here’s the thing, love isn't a race, and marriage definitely isn't a pit stop where you fix everything that’s broken. It’s more like embarking on a journey together, knowing you've got all the necessary gear packed.

Seven years is a long trek, and if he only pulled out the compass after she decided to explore new territories, it raises the question: is this a knee-jerk reaction to losing her, or a genuine realization of his love? Proposing right after a breakup can feel a bit like trying to patch a leak with bubble gum – it might hold for a moment, but it’s not a long-term solution.

Marriage shouldn't be the band-aid for relationship woes. Your sister's feelings of hurt and confusion are the real deal, and they need to be addressed before she even thinks about walking down the aisle. Plus, the feeling of a forced marriage? Ouch. That’s like wearing shoes two sizes too small in hopes they’ll eventually fit.

If I were whispering sweet nothings into your sister's ear, I’d say: darling, take your time. Love yourself first, heal, and understand what YOU want from life and love. If her ex truly loves her, he'll be patient and willing to rebuild the trust and relationship on her terms, not just because he’s afraid to lose her.

So, to answer your question: proceed? Maybe. Forgive? Absolutely, when she’s ready. Forget? Never – it’s all part of the journey. 🚢💔💍

[Vesuvius87]

It depends on who that ex boyfriend is and what was the reason for the break-up.

If it's my ex boyfriend that's a legitimate narcissist (future faker) that scammed me with $1,200 and had was after my grandma's house, hells nope. I would be laughing so hard before saying "In your dreams loser".

[DishLady]

It depends really heavily on who the guy is. If my ex husband asked me then no… if one other ex asked me I’d have to really think about it bc his mom rules his universe…. Exes are exes for a reason.

[Asker]

Yeah he already knew my sister wanted marriage. I don't understand why some men keep stalling and when the women leaves, take actions like never before and propose.

[strateguy632]

i wouldn't