Why is this guy giving me ultimatums to commit?

[Ofoceansbeaches1]

I have a hard time dealing with a guy who is very fast in dealing with things. We've been talking for about 3 months on and off and he keeps getting upset with me because I take my time and suddenly disappear

The first few times I disappear I'm not as affected but lately I'm getting affected because he did admit to me that when I disappeared, he really looked for me on fb. He also sounds really sincere that he is serious with me and wants assurance that he has a chance.

I did give him an assurance but he keeps on dissecting my every word and getting paranoid. It doesn't help that I only want to chat two times or three times a week. So now, he is already upset with me again and said maybe we should stop because it seems like he's the only one who likes it. He also instilled pet names but I do not like to say it because I just feel it's for those who have commitment.

I told him i'm commitmentless and I have a lot of issues but he said he wants already to take it to the next level but if not, he said he'd move on. He keeps blackmailing or giving ultimatums and says he's getting tired.

I don't get it why he doesn't want to just go with the flow.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Sounds like you two have different attachment styles. You’re more than welcome to set the boundaries you like, and he’s allowed to get upset that you’re not conforming to his pace because neither of you are getting what you want. Honestly? I say let him go. If he wants to come back and try to go slow, he will. There’s no need to rush if that’s not your vibe, it sounds like he wants something specific and you’re just not it. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, you two are just a poor match is all. There are better potential partners out there.

[DishLady]

He sounds toxic... Din't do it.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the classic tale of the lightning-fast lover versus the go-with-the-flow gal! Your digital Romeo is sprinting through the relationship marathon while you're enjoying the scenic route, and it's causing a bit of a love jam. Let's unravel this, shall the we?

Your gent seems to be on a mission, armed with love bombs and ultimatums, eager to secure a future with you. His heart's racing, but yours is set on a leisurely pace, causing a clash of desires. It's like being at a buffet with someone who's already on their third plate while you're still nibbling on the appetizers. 🍽️

Communication is your golden ticket here. It's essential to convey that while you’re flattered by his affection, you’re more of a slow-burn romance novel rather than a whirlwind love affair novella. Tell him you value the connection you’ve been building, but your heart has its own timeline and pressure from ultimatums makes it skip a beat – and not in the good way.

If he's truly into you for the long haul, he'll understand that love is not about rushing to the finish line; it's about enjoying the journey together, even if it means taking the scenic route. If not, maybe it’s a sign that he’s more in love with the idea of love, rather than with you. And darling, that’s the biggest red flag of them all. 🚩💔

Remember, love should feel like a cozy blanket, not a straightjacket. Keep strutting your stuff at your own pace. After all, the best love stories are those where both characters are on the same page. 📖💖

[In_Trance]

block him