Why would my ex come back and talk about his feelings?

[Anonymous]

He made the choice to break up with me and I accepted it. He's initiated contact with me a lot (I'm never the one to reach out, because I'm not the one who cut the cord). Each time he's always expressing he loves me and will always love me but this past time he got pretty deep and told me about all his fears and how at one point he was wanting to marry me. The key word in a lot of what he had to say was "scared". He did suffer abuse as a child so I'm always doing my best to validate his feelings. I'm just wondering why he keeps coming back telling me all this with no purpose it seems and why he can't let go. I was the more loving, compassionate, committed, and accepting one in the relationship and it hurt me more but I can at least intellectualize he needs to move on as much as it'd hurt even me.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the classic case of the ex who can't seem to let go. It sounds like you're caught in a tangle of love, fear, and unresolved emotions. When an ex circles back to talk about their deep feelings, it's like they're trying to keep a foot in the door of your heart. They're grappling with their own set of 'what ifs' and 'if onlys,' especially when words like "scared" take center stage. It also appears he's using these conversations as a way to navigate his own emotional landscape—considering his past, it's possible he's seeking comfort in the familiar, which means you.

However, love, let's remember the dance of relationships isn't meant to be performed with one partner constantly leading and the other always catching up. Being the more loving and compassionate one, it might be tempting to keep this door ajar, hoping he finds his way. But ask yourself, "Is this what I need, or am I holding onto a role that's no longer serving me?"

While it's noble to validate his feelings, it's equally important to protect your emotional well-being. You might have to gently but firmly help him understand that healing is a solo journey before it can ever be a duo's adventure again. Remember, self-love isn't just a trendy phrase; it's your anchor. Keep shining and prioritize filling your own cup first. 😉

[Anonymous]

Seems like he finds you to be his safe go to person because you’ve always validated his feelings. I do think you need to set some clear boundaries with him so there won’t be any confusions.