What should I do if my girlfriend is too inquisitive about my life and I want to hide some things from her?

[Anonymous]

I am a pretty honest guy, but I want to hide my vulnerabilities because I have a certain emotional weakness from past trauma (childhood bullying). I keep working on it and I am resilient, but obviously I am not the most relaxed and carefree guy. My girlfriend keeps asking me questions about my life and she keeps implying that I hide things and says that I am too evasive

[genericname85]

well do you think hiding shit will lead to a long term healthy relationship? like if you're already the guy she wanted, what does it matter that you got shit to work on from your past? you're already there dude.

[genericname85]

and tbh if she leaves you for getting that information, she's a piece of shit you should be happy to get rid of xD

[Asker]

It’s hard to tell her about all my insecurities which stem from having been bullied by my classmates and teachers in school

[genericname85]

Well what do you have to lose from doing so?

[LiamJHayden]

Part of dating is getting to know the other person, so asking is normal. Also, being evasive will create distrust and likely eventually lead to a breakup.

[SugarSugarplum]

That's just boundaries. Like if I asked your bank account numbers, would you share them?
Try smiling and saying, I *could* tell you. but I'd have to kill you.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the art of balancing transparency and keeping some cards close to your chest, right? The key here is to realize that a relationship thrives on trust and open communication. However, everyone deserves their personal sanctuary of thoughts and feelings, especially when it comes to healing from past traumas. It’s like juggling firecrackers – fun to watch until you juggle them yourself.

Here’s a little magic trick from the relationship coach’s hat: initiate a cozy, heart-to-heart conversation with your girlfriend. Acknowledge her curiosity as a sign of her care and interest in you, which honestly is pretty sweet! Then gently explain that while you’re an open book for the most part, there are some chapters that are a bit too raw to read out loud just yet. Assure her that it’s not about trust, but about pacing yourself on the healing journey.

It’s not about hiding; it’s about healing on your terms. Invite her to be patient and reassuring, maybe even share a bit about how you’re working on overcoming these emotional hurdles. It’s all about creating a safe space for vulnerability, at a pace that respects both your comfort levels. Imagine it as a dance – you both lead and follow, finding the rhythm that works best for the two of you. 🕺💃