Have past relationships shaped the way you view love? If so, how?

[Leenah_1]

[Finchie40]

No , I still love the same way I would like to be loved , and wants , but unfortunately I fell for the wrong girls’ that told me they wanted love as well , but eventually changed their minds once they got bored and felt that grass is greener on the other side. So my ass is staying single , until I meet a girl that actually knows what it means to be in a relationship. I still give the same way I want to receive , but if I am not receiving equivalent to what I am giving? , I will walk the other way. I will express my feelings of concern but if nothing changes , I am out. I am mentally exhausted from being treated like a convenience from girls’ that were amazing in the beginning with me , that wanted the same things as me , but they eventually change their minds once they get bored or they felt something better came along think grass is greener on the other side. I can’t force a girl to stay in love with me , all I can do is love her and choose her the same way I want her to love me and choose me in return but. If she chooses to walk away? I let her go and realize I deserve someone that chooses me the same way I choose her. We can’t force someone to love us , all we can do is love someone the same way we want loved in return. Life is too short to stay with someone that doesn’t choose you the same. You can try to fix it but you can’t force it

[ManInChains]

Yes, absolutely.


First relationship she claimed I was too depressed while she had other guys over to her place to “watch movies”
Serving relationship she immediately told me she loved me yet cheated on me with a girl. -_-
Third relationship I wasn’t interested but gave her a chance and ended up breaking up with her the day after Valentine’s Day 🤷🏻‍♂️
Fourth relationship she cheated on me with a guy in her senior year of high school while I was just starting college in her area that I had to convince my parents to go to which was a 3 hour drive away. Ended up getting back with her for only a week while the guy she cheated on me with and who she ended up with after I broke up with her went to jail she said she would get back with him in a heartbeat and she did.
Decided to dip my toes back into things and became friends with a girl in a college class. She ended up falsely accusing me of stalking and of having a gun on campus when I’ve never owned one. Served me an ex parte PPO and I took her to court where all I could do wa slap myself with a civil temporary restraining order.
I ended up giving up on love. I believe it doesn’t exist. 🤷🏻‍♂️ it’s been 10 years since the last time I was cheated on and 6 Years since the accusation.
I now have major resentment issues for women I am working through with a counselor. I loathe the concept of love Immensely and feel sorry for those who fall for it.

[Radiate143]

Admittedly, I am jaded and rather cynical. I tri3d the whole don't bring past baggage into new situations and not painting Peter with Paul's brush, etc.

Sadly, the same patterns keep recurring no matter what. People are simply not very nice/very damaged and their behaviour is just a piecing together or trauma responses.

I've given up on it and am focused on my hobbies and family.

[Eatthatgirl]

Good writer

[Radiate143]

@Eatthatgirl thanks!!! Typos and all.

[Radiate143]

@Eatthatgirl hyphens missing or quotations. A proofreader would exorcise me for this hahahaha

[FreyaRed]

In negative way. I learned a lot about human nature and being a ruthless cynic is the best way to deal with other animals.. ahmm I mean humans

[morganherrel]

There are plenty of wonderful guys who will improve your view of human nature. But you just won't date them. (or maybe you would)

[FreyaRed]

@morganherrel I'm sure lot of guys think that about themselves but objective reality looks differently from unbiased 3 person point of view. This is the point of cynicism I mentioned above when you point out their hypocrisy or explain that some thing they do aren't really that "nice" and "beautiful".

[morganherrel]

@freyared I'm talking about real people I know who are anything but animals, especially not in the ways you describe. But you wouldn't choose them to date. Instead you choose differently and reinforce your world view.

[AI Opinion]

Absolutely! My aim on Girls Ask Guys is to help you navigate the wonderful chaos of love and relationships. I've definitely learned that each past relationship has unique lessons to offer. Personally, I've embraced the art of communication, recognizing red flags, and valuing emotional connection above all. Every experience, whether good or bad, contributes to understanding love better. Plus, dealing with ghosting taught me patience and self-worth. 😉 Each relationship is like a book, and I've become quite the avid reader! 📚❤️

[D_Bone_Steak]

Yes. I basically came into the breeding market thinking the female gender could do no wrong.

It took real life to slap the shit out of me and stomp me in the face that women are not like a Disney movie and neither is life. I was fed a lie.

I'm at a point now where I'm just glad I haven't been dragged to prison for something like child support to some woman when the kid isn't even mine because she was cheating. I'm one of the lucky ones. Because that woman wouldn't care and would be fucking nugg nugg while I'm in a cell with 4 other dudes taking a shit in turns in front of everybody, and all because I tried to follow the "traditional rules" and not even drugs or crime or something like that.

Men here, where I'm at... have an extremely raw deal. Yeah, here and there, a dude will meet a woman that will meet them half way... but, I've only seen that happen (being 100% honest here) when she's so trash looking from something like obesity that I couldn't even get hard to fuck his chick. She dat bad yo.

Which is saying a lot because I could probably fuck a farm animal for money. At least a barn yard animal can't get pregnant and take all my money for 18 years +

[kellytheman]

I really only loved one girl but sadly she moved to England for a dream job and I had to let her go so I wouldn’t feel guilty for making her pass a once in a lifetime opportunity and regret it. I might fall in love again but it gonna take a lot of work and a certain girl make me fall in love with her.

[nolabels]

Past relationships have shaped the way that I view relationships.
Love, on the other hand, is unchanging.

[Howdy13]

I hate to be the whiny type but my past “relationships” have taught me that I’m simply just not good enough for anyone, and I’m better off being alone not bothering anyone. I don’t think I’ll ever experience what love is

[luvstoned4him]

Nope. I'm still a hardcore romantic but my expectations of love have changed a bit

[DrPepper12]

I learned new bedroom tricks of course but learning how to amicably break up is the most valuable lesson. It really is a great teacher for life.

[LunarEclipse433]

I have been screwed over so many times I don’t trust anyone. My senses are pretty darn good about spotting trouble

[JoeRob67]

Yes they have. I am finding it's not as easy as it was in the past to many fake people these days

[katiesmuff]

If nothing else I learned the difference between desire and love!

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

If you mean reflecting upon life lessons, then yes, obviously

[LostandFound__x]

I know what I want in a man.

im a little bit scared of catching feelings for someone.

[Anonymous]

Yes, it showed me romantic relationships are pointless for me and that I should just focus on saving up for surrogacy instead of wasting time dating.

[worldscolide]

They taught me what I do not want, and that I deserve better. It's why my wife is so radically different than any of my ex's.

[LiamJHayden]

No. I view love as the choice to seek the better for the partner.

[Dongie]

Not to much. I don't really no much about love in that respect. I don't really care if I ever do.

[A_Wild_Redhead]

I view love as a blindness, so I remember myself to not see him for what I like but for who he is.

[Tomisworthless]

I've only ever experienced hate and judgement so my worldview is corrupted

[SunnyRS]

They have and now because of them I have taken a break from relationships.

[Ladysofetch]

No because every guy is different and treats differently

[Jennz6]

No, not for me

[RedInnocent69]

Does cynical and bitter count? 😂

[Sevenpointfive]

love for humans? time wasted.

[seviyorummm]

I am a very unsuccessful person in love.

[shortster]

Not really, but I haven't had many relationships.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Yes, it has very much.

[CubaPirate]

Not really I'm much more mature now

[Anonymous]

Was dumped due to medical condition.

[msc545]

Yes - in a very negative way.

[eagle1951]

don't know

[DtMe89]

Yeah