Should I reach out to him?

[Anonymous]

My casual one night relationship guy has gone on a week’s vacation and said he’d be in touch on his return. He hasn’t returned yet, I don’t think. But he sent a few messages while on vacation. To see how I was. Should I text him, to invite him to catch up again, or should I leave it until the end of the week to do so? He might be back by now.

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm, that's a tough one sis. On one hand, I get why you'd wanna reach out so he knows you're interested in hanging out again. But reaching out first could also make you seem a little overeager, ya know?

Since it was kinda casual, I'd maybe let this one play out a bit longer before making the first move. Give him a chance to miss you too! He did say he'd contact you when he got back, so I'd hold off until at least the end of the week like you said.

That way if he hasn't hit you up by then, shooting him a casual text wouldn't seem desperate. Something like "hey, hope you had a good trip! Let me know if you wanna grab a drink soon and catch up." Then ball's in his court to respond.

I know waiting sucks, but playing it cool shows you're not just sitting around waiting on him. And if he's interested, not hearing from you yet will probably make him want to see you more. Guys like feeling like they have to work for it a little!

So I say give it till the weekend, then you can test the waters without coming on too strong. He'll either respond happily or you'll have your answer. Good luck sis!

[Asker]

He got in touch. Hooked up; then he asked me out for a dinner date and cancelled out the next day (said he was sick). That we’d have it another time.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man that's rough, I'd be pissed if a dude did that to me too. Canceling a date right after you hooked up is a super lame move.

On one hand, maybe he really was sick and it wasn't just an excuse. But honestly it's sketchy he canceled the next day after asking you out. That's kinda sus.

I wouldn't freak out or anything, but I'd definitely hold off on texting him again. Ball's in his court now since he bailed. If he was really feeling you, he'd reschedule for a specific day and time. Not just a vague "another time."

I'd play it cool for now. No need to confront him about it or anything. Keep your options open in case he hits you up again, but don't sit around waiting. Maybe see what other guys are up to in the meantime!

If he doesn't suggest an actual date within the next week, I'd take that as a sign he's not that interested. There's other dudes who'd treat you way better anyway. Don't stress about this clown too much. You'll find someone better, just be patient!

[Asker]

I think you’re right. I went into it just expecting something casual. If he doesn’t reach out, or only reaches out for straight fun, then that’s all he wants 😊. I can’t be upset about it though. We agreed to no strings.

[Oliverlogan263]

You're totally right sis, don't get upset about it. Guys will be guys sometimes! The most important thing is that you knew from the start this was just meant to be casual fun with no strings.

As long as you both understood that going in, then he's not really doing anything wrong by keeping it light. You can't expect a relationship to develop if a relationship wasn't even the goal, ya know? Girl just go have fun yourself!

I agree, if all he hits you up for is the hookups without any real dates or getting to know you talks, then sadly that shows where his head's at. But no sense wasting energy being mad - just do you and let him do him. Your vibe deserves someone just as hype to give you their time.

So keep it moving, keep your options open, and don't get tied down worrying if he'll come around or not. You got this sis! Looks like it's back to the hunt for the right fit. And I know you'll find an even better dude real soon.

[Daniela1982]

Yet you do seem to be upset, like you want to own him. Have you by any chance caught some feelings, or don't think you can get another guy? 🤔

[Asker]

@Daniela1982 good question. I started to like him a bit, so I cut it off eventually.

[SuchSightsToShowYou]

If he's sending you messages, there's no reason you can't respond. It doesn't really matter if he's back or not, if you two are talking.

If you want, you can say something vague about doing something, "when you get back."

[RageBabe]

I would wait for him to get in touch with you if he said he would; otherwise, he might feel invaded.

[HelpfulWoman]

easy stop. you're already trying to make a hook up more than it is.

[AI Opinion]

Aiming to add some spark to your love life! 😉 It sounds like there's a little intrigue in the air, which is exciting. If he's already sent a few messages, it seems like he's interested and not ghosting. If you want to keep that vibe going, a casual message to catch up might be just the thing. But if you want to play it a bit mysterious, waiting until the end of the week could keep the anticipation alive. Trust your gut and sprinkle a little flirty magic in your decision! 😏✨

[Nikki1989]

If either of you really cared, you would be talking and not playing the texting game.

[Anonymous]

If you want to get boned again, definitely shoot him a note.

[CoolCatMar1]

Wait for him that is better

[RedInnocent69]

No. Don’t be desperate.

[Jmmmfi4]

I DON'T SEE WHY NOT

[WhitneySnow]

Text him

[Anonymous]

No!!!