Girls, what boundaries do you think I should have with female friends?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend and I have been arguing about me being friends with other girls. I understand some of her concerns because the girls are a lot younger and thinner than her, but there's literally zero chance I would let any of these girls have sex with me. They're gross and sleep around a lot anyway, so just not my type. But my girlfriend thinks it's a problem that I hang out with them and go places with them, but she has guy friends, so I'm not really sure how that makes sense.

I'd appreciate some perspective here, and want to know what boundaries are reasonable to accept. Like, what boundaries do you keep for your SO?

[paledreams]

She's right ♀️ if she's attractive as in my head lol to make my answer valid because I really need to metaphorically step into one's shoes - if I had a hot girlfriend, why the hell would I ever need or even welcome or even want, female friends - that's just crazy 😧🤣

[jahaims]

If you wouldn't say or do it it front of your girlfriend then you shouldn't do it. As long as both you and your female friend maintain respect for your girlfriend it's fine.

[WhitneySnow]

She’s jealous. The only boundaries you need are no flirting and no physical contact or cuddling beyond an occasional hug.

[Asker]

Completely agree with you. And do you think it's unreasonable to be alone with these girls, or stay the night at group events where these girls are?

[WhitneySnow]

That’s fine as long as you don’t do anything inappropriate.

[Asker]

Thank you. Screenshotting this shit and sending it to her...

[DreamCrescent]

that’s bullcrap. and you found an 18year old to get advice from who says it’s okay to spend the night with gross girls that are thinner and younger than your wife. congratulations 👏

[Asker]

@DreamCrescent they're just friends though. Even if they liked me, I 100% don't want anything to do with them like that. It's about trust, in the end.

[DreamCrescent]

it’s about partner’s feelings in the other end. we can demand trust all day long and till we’re blue in the face. your wife has indicated she feels some type of way that you associate yourself with these women. her feelings don’t matter and that is shitty on your part

[Asker]

I'm not saying her feelings don't matter, I'm just trying to make sense of what reasonable boundaries are. She was seriously the first one to start with the whole "he's just a friend" stuff even after we both agreed that friends of the opposite sex were off limits once we got serious. So I went back out and made friends with girls. She STILL hangs out with guys. It's only a problem when I do it. She did all that BS of accusing me of being controlling and jealous, but now we're in this weird place. I don't even know what's normal at this point. And by the way, my last reply to you was her words, not mine. This whole thread is going straight to her, and she needs to decide which way of life makes sense.

[DreamCrescent]

well, i don’t know what to tell you. if what you’re saying is true, a little jealousy and controlling from a guy is quite validating to a woman. i don’t know how to relate to your wife if she wasn’t flattered by it. not saying it doesn’t cause arguments, but it’s natural and healthy in my opinion. i’d like it if my guy worried about who i spent time with, to a very certain extent

it seems you and your wife have chosen the “you stomp on my feelings i stomp on yours approach”. it’s gone a bit too far to dial back i don’t know what to tell you.

i think regardless of the potential that something or nothing would happen, regardless of physical attraction or lack of it, regardless of the “just friends” status, a partner’s comfort level should come first and foremost in who we hang out with. but you know your relationship better than anyone on this site, so dig deep!!

good luck 🙂🙂

[Asker]

Thank you, Dream. Sincerely. Your advice is solid and I appreciate the perspective.

[DreamCrescent]

💕💕

[Agape93]

Don't be alone with them, tell her what's going on and with whom and just generally proactively communicate

[Asker]

Do you mean alone in private, or alone anywhere?

[Agape93]

Anywhere

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the balance of friendships and love! 💖 It's crucial to discuss boundaries openly. It's understandable that your girlfriend has concerns, especially about you hanging with much younger women. To keep things smooth, set mutual boundaries like avoiding one-on-one outings, being transparent, and including your partner in gatherings. Make sure your closeness with female friends respects your girlfriend's comfort zone. Communication is key, love! And being flirty isn’t necessarily a threat if trust reigns supreme. 🌟 Focus on building trust and recognizing red flags in your interactions with friends and your relationship will blossom!

[Anonymous]

What kind of trash are you to call these girls gross?

Your poor girlfriend, if you even have one... which I doubt.

[Asker]

I'd bet $100,000 you're abusive to every guy that made the mistake of being in any kind of relationship with you. After your first, of course.

We both know the real reason you're upset though.