Why do I feel more like a mother than a girlfriend in my relationship?

[Anonymous]

We have been together for 7 years, I am (27) and he is (29). We have many good and bad memories, we have solved our problems together for so long but I can't stand it anymore!!! I don't want to tell someone who is 29 what to do. The simplest example is making his bed in the morning. I am his girlfriend, not his mother, and I want to remind him of that.

[sparkle1516]

I'll be honest I ran into the same problem in my relationship and I'll be honest it was a conversation I didn't want to have but I sat him down and told him to start acting like an adult because I'm not a dating a child, I want to have a partner. Anyway the conversation went well and he started helping around the house and stuff so I'd say be honest and tell him how you feel. I feel like women in general are care givers and that's great but not every woman is cut out for it.

Hope this helped. 🙏

[D_Bone_Steak]

Sometimes we just want to take care of somebody. It's why I get such a raging boner when I watch 'Red Dragon' and see that scenario with the blind chick. Gotta love those Hannibal Lecter movies... I even read the books.

It's not necessarily a bad thing, and my guess is the only reason you think so is because you feel it's not being appreciated. So if you're doing something you just don't like doing for whatever reason... just stop doing it. See what happens. Most people don't make their bed anymore... it's a old tradition that makes no sense now. He's just going to fuck it up as soon as he crawls back into bed. Better to fuck around and find out now than wait until your 57 and he's 59.

[HawkPerception]

I rarely ever make my bed. It's not important. As long as the sheets are cleaned every month or couple months, it's really not a priority. Unless a guest is coming by or you're leaving a room, it's really not a big deal.

Fun fact Dust mites are more attracted to made beds than unmade beds.

[EmmaMary]

Congratulations on winning a Troll of the day award.

So you're 27 going on 36 - 45 years of age! 🤣🤣🤣

Might I suggest next time you get your facts correct first, before Trolling.

[EmmaMary]

Thank you for the MHO.

[AI Opinion]

As a relationship coach with a flair for drama and love wisdom, let me dive into your world of relationship woes! Feeling like a mom instead of a girlfriend can be a total buzzkill. It might be time to remind your partner that being a couple is a two-person job, and you shouldn't be his bed-making fairy. Try some fun communication to set boundaries and express your feelings without sounding like a nagging nagger. You deserve to feel like the goddess you are in this relationship, not a parental figure! 😘

[derrick]

If you feel like a mother instead of a girlfriend, it may be because you are carrying a lot of the emotional burden. Try talking to her about how you feel. Tell her that she needs to step up, otherwise you will feel like you are responsible for everything. Relationships should be about both people supporting each other, not one person doing everything. But it is still normal for this to happen in long-term relationships. My only advice is to get out of this situation as soon as possible.

[Asker]

You are right, a balanced relationship is a must. If he does not share the emotional burden, I will talk and set boundaries. It will not work like this in the long run.

[dallas]

If you’re feeling like his mom, it’s probably because you’re doing everything for him; cooking, cleaning, reminding him of stuff. That’s not your job. Stop doing it all and let him figure things out. He needs to act like a boyfriend, not a kid!

[Asker]

You're right, we must share our responsibilities. I won't carry this burden anymore.

[circle]

It’s normal to feel this way if you’re taking on too much emotional labor or responsibility. Talk about sharing the load. Relationships should feel equal, not parenting-y. Set boundaries, prioritize your own needs, and remember that you’re a partner, not a caregiver. Balance is key, you’re not his mom or his sister.

[Asker]

You are absolutely right, from now on I will set boundaries and demand equality.

[CuriousMoonFox]

Ahh, my favorite hate phrase: I am not your mother.

It is very fortunate to have come across this video since it made me realize that there are women who were willing to learn the perspective of the other side. Give it a try.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/tqmm2AwLDKg

[Nikki1989]

Most men are big babies until they reach at least 30 and some never grow up. I come across these kinds of men all the time. Hopefully, your man will snap out of it soon but don't hold your breath waiting for it to happen.

[Jersey2]

I made my bed in the Army but not much anywhere else. Currently, my wife makes the bed although I do it sometimes as well but we are talking about 2 times a month or so.

Beds don’t have to be made. You want it, fine. He is okay without it. He has other priorities. I take care of many aspects of our life that she does not do. It works for us. Don’t be a nag.

[Iron_Man]

You have to come up with a compromise? Don’t be so picky about he didn’t make his bed. I understand what you’re talking about but basically that’s his business and if you keep pushing it down his throat every day then that causes a problem. Learn to relax a little bit if not, you’re gonna have a lot of arguments

[Jamie05rhs]

You feel like a mother because you are acting like one. Stop acting like one.

If you absolutely can't help yourself and the instincts are too strong, then have a baby. re-state//background_color_rgba (0, 0, 0, 0), font_color_rgb (77, 77, 77), justifyLeft

[noohair]

You are making the one mistake that dooms a relationship. You are trying to fix him. Every man is a whole person with flaws. If you try to fix his flaws you will break him. The only person you can change is yourself. So change and accept him as he is or move on…

[SuchSightsToShowYou]

Is this maybe a case of there being a guy way to do things and a girl way to do things?

I'll be honest, as a guy, bed-making has never been a big priority for me.

What other kinds of decisions are you making for this guy?

[Anonymous]

Why do you force him to make his bed if he wouldn't do it otherwise? He's doing it for you, not for himself.

[genericname85]

Well what if you stop acting like a mother? what happens then?

[Anonymous]

You're right. You don't have to tell him to make his bed in the morning. So why are you?

Perhaps you can reframe your question. It feels like there is something more important underneath that is frustrating you.

[Flower7]

Don’t make his bed. Just let it stay unmade. Don’t take the initiative to do that.

[KrakenAttackin]

Yeah, why do anything at all for him, after all, the relationship is all about her.

[paledreams]

That's just terrible, the prime 20s 👀😃😅 I feel for you

[Anonymous]

why are you telling him to make his bed? i dont tell my man to make his bed

[beefcakebradybatson]

Talk to him about being a man, not a boy, and if his immaturity persists, you may mull ending the relationship.

[Cheerfull009]

2 years age difference is not much, as you live together and love , making bed of your boyfriend is not a so big issue, love need sacrifice

[sibeluysalci]

it's a fact that men become late. You need to talk to him about this

[jazzy34]

Why are you choosing to stay with a man child?

[Anonymous]

That's your relationship dynamic

[KrakenAttackin]

Feminist. Is poisoning your mind.

[MasterKS]

he sounds like kido! LOL

[Jmmmfi4]

YOU'RE 27? NOT 36-45?