Has anyone ever struggled with not feeling attracted to their wife anymore? How did you handle it?

[Anonymous]

We have been married for 6 years and we love each other very much and he was very physically attractive but after having a baby everything changed, he doesn't look the same and I don't feel the physical attraction that I used to feel. It's hard because I still love him and care deeply for him but I can't ignore the fact that everything feels different now. How do I deal with this situation without hurting his feelings or making him feel insecure? I'm not sure if this is just a phase or something more but it weighs on me. Has anyone been through the same thing or do you have any advice?

[Makeushiver]

Yes and it is a difficult situation. When we met it was often spending evenings at various vars. When she was loaded, she was sexually advanced. At no point it wan't actually spousal but it was almost there and it was both long term and monogamous and it was heading that way. When we started living together I discovered that she would be totally hot in bed but sober, frigid. She just wan't interested. I have often gotten hit upon by some very attractive women and when things were seemingly going well, I ignored them. I don't any longer. I feel like I did my part and I have no interest in being celibate. Porn doesn't really do it for me because I get turned on by a woman's arousal and orgasm (s) pretty often by women, She started taking opiates recreationally and when she quit she started drinking too much. She was a stunningly beautiful when I met her and drugs and alcohol had aged her. A shrink put her on an SSRI which causes weight gain and wipes out sex drive as well as energy. I tried to discuss things, didn't help so I started visiting higher end escorts. In many ways I appreciate that because I learned far more about sex and how to pleasure a woman - both subjects I had already considered myself pretty advanced in and which help me to this day. To this day I have a number of sex workers for friends and I really like the way they act about sex. Maybe if things were turned around, I don't know. Beyond all of the reasons I names it's natural that the infatuation always wears off i Good luck with whatever you do. Try to be kind and compassionate at least. They are much more sophisticated about this sort of thing in other cultures and it's not surprising for couples to remain together despite fucking different people. Also keep in mind that any woman is likely to get just as bored with their spouse as any man does and though it may seem impossible, she could be thinking about the same thing. Don't do anything that you can't undo and try not to ever do anything that would cause her any humiliation. Should you decide on an affair keep it discreet and make it clear ( if it's true) that you aren't looking for another long term relationship. when any relationship. I have dated some beautiful women and it seems the same regardless. After some amount of time sexual boredom is not uncommon. Esp. if one spouse undergoes some drastic changes in appearance, If I married a woman who was beautiful at 120# and she is now 190# w/o any medical condition causing it I consider it a lack of respect just as I would if I gained the 75% greater weight.

[PeachyPie93]

Why not divorce? Seems nasty unless she knows about your activities..

[Purpleronnie]

I’m not sure anyone can help you with this. Only you would know where these feelings may have come from and when / if to involve your wife in how you are feeling. I’m sure many relationships go through periods like this , you either work at it to get it back on track or you dont. Much can change the dynamics of a relationship together with the fact that what people want and expect changes as we grow. You have to look within yourself and decide what you want then either fight for it or walk away.

[PeachyPie93]

So did you only love your wife for her looks? Like obviously I like toned guys and am very sexually attracted to that body type but if my partner gained weight my feelings and attraction wouldn't change because I love them.. Unless they became like morbidly obese cuz c'omon you can't even walk or live life anymore lol.
I would suggest marriage counselling and talking to her about things.. if it doesn't work then divorce and don't have kids again.. since you can't stand the changes in woman's bodies after your child destroys it..

[Flower7]

The two of you could start exercising and doing more physical activities together, like taking walks or bike-riding. Maybe she will lose some weight from that.

[AI Opinion]

As your virtual relationship coach with a sprinkle of magic, I feel you! 💕 It's totally normal for attraction to fluctuate over time, especially after big life changes. Falling back in love might mean focusing on emotional intimacy and shared experiences. Keep the communication open and honest—without delivering a lovebomb that'll knock his socks off! Plan date nights, share hobbies, and maybe a sexy wink or two. Feeling disconnected physically doesn't spell disaster. Love is a journey, and yours is just evolving. Keep vibing and communicate with warmth and positivity. You've got this! 🌟

[celticman]

This is very common, especially after major changes. It's important to focus on the emotional connection first. Physical attraction may wane, but by spending time together, strengthening communication, and showing appreciation, you can grow closer again. Sharing your feelings gently is the best way to support your partner.

[Asker]

Physical attraction can change over time, so it's important to share your feelings gently.

[ikeaukea]

This is a very sensitive topic. First, focus on your love and remember that the lack of physical attraction can be temporary. Communication is very important; by sharing your feelings gently, you can find a solution together. Support your partner, help them do things that will increase their self-confidence. Love is not limited to appearances.

[Asker]

I totally agree, love is so much more than just looks.

[Finchie40]

Yes, leave her and move on

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your core values changed after your child was born. It happens to some people. Perhaps start looking into marriage counseling.

[sage2021]

Why are you Anonymous?🤷🏼‍♀️

[mattthefatbat]

Your wife is a man?

[Unit1]

I was wondering the same thing. First I would figure his wife is a transgirl but then he said the pregnant part. man, i'm outta here.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

could be a translation from Turkish, I've seen this problem before, gender pronouns are poorly translated each time

[WowGIrl4ever]

I saw that