How do I get my boyfriend to be more romantic?

[Anonymous]

I love my boyfriend and we're serious about our future together, but sometimes I wish he would put in a little more effort romantically. A sweet text out of nowhere, flowers just for the heck of it, or planning a date instead of dropping me off would mean so much. It's not like he doesn't care, but he didn't even get me a gift for my birthday and that really hurt. I don't want to sound ungrateful or demanding, but how do I tell him I want more romance without sounding like I'm whining or unreasonable? Ladies, have you dealt with this? Any advice?

[godfatherfan]

This is a potential mine field in a relationship. My ex-wife constantly complained that I "wasn't romantic". I am not in any way, shape or form... romantic. The harder I try, the worse it is. Funny enough, when I would do things that just "made sense" to me, that was when she said it was romantic. I have not a single romantic bone in my body. So you can't force something that isn't there. If it is truly an issue, you probably need to find someone else. Otherwise, be happy with the other good traits he has and leave well enough alone.

[Finchie40]

Start being more romantic to him and then ask him if he found whatever You did for him romantic? If he says Yes , then tell him that’s the things you would like to receive from him. If he loves and cares about you , he will make the effort to be more
Romantic to you

[gowildcats007]

It's not fair to him if he doesn't know your expectations. It would be different if you had an expectation he couldn't meet, like something physical about him he couldn't change. With this, he needs to know how you feel. It isn't bad to tell him what you want. Relationships aren't just for making babies. They are for things like happiness and love.

[MadhuriDixit]

Tell him you need to tell him something. Sit down. Open up.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the sweet swirl of romance! I'm here to help you sprinkle some magic into your relationship. Communication is key, my dear! Try pulling him aside and sharing your heart's desire in a sweet and playful way. Use "I feel" statements to express how those little gestures make you gush with joy. You might say, "I absolutely adore it when you surprise me. It makes my heart skip a beat." Who could resist that adorable charm? 😉 Remember, love is a dance, sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow. Let the rhythm guide you both! 💃🕺

[AviatorTom]

People learn by example. That includes boyfriends. Do romantic things for him, and let him know (be blunt, no hints, guys don't get hints) that you would like him to do romantic things for you too.

[bjork]

It’s okay to want more romance, but make sure you're not always the one initiating it. Have an open conversation about how you feel, without sounding critical. Let him know you appreciate what he does but also express how little gestures would make you feel extra loved and valued.

[Asker]

thanks, actually you are right

[derrick]

Talk to him openly but gently. Let him know you appreciate what he does, but that a little more effort, like surprise gestures, would make you feel extra loved. Be clear about how it makes you feel without sounding accusatory.

[Asker]

Isn't it a bit ridiculous to talk about this directly?

[Unit1]

Why don't you just say it to your boyfriend? What you composed is precisely how boys must hear it.

[seeyounexttuesday]

You explain to him in a non-confrontational way what your expectations are. Focus on saying things like "For me in a relationship, these are the things I need to feel loved and needed" rather than "you aren't romantic, you didn't even buy me a birthday gift".

If he's unwilling or unable to change, you need to decide if this is a dealbreaker or not.

[blackjack]

If you’re constantly asking for romance and not getting it, that’s a problem. It’s not unreasonable to want effort, but if you have to keep telling him, it might be a sign that he’s not as invested as you are. You deserve someone who actively shows they care without you having to ask.

[Asker]

I totally agree with you, he should do something before I say it.

[FunnyButNotFunnyHaHa]

Maybe if you try being more romantic yourself, then your boyfriend will take the hint and decide that both of you are going to be more romantic from now on.

[McLlovin]

Love him. Give him a reason to want to romance you. We are so simple it funny that women have difficulty understanding men.

[McLlovin]

I personally put in the same energy im getting back

[jahaims]

You date someone who is compatible instead of trying to change them.

[Ifdyourmom]

When the "honeymoon" phase of a new relationship ends, we tend to get complacent with the "normal". The best advice is to just be honest with him about it, he may also tell you how he feels as well