Wife and I sleeping separately now for a year. Can we reconcile?

[Anonymous]

Things have thawed slightly during that time.

Children turned 20 in college

Can just keep as is /separate/reconcile?

I don't know

[PeachyPie93]

Have a talk about things.. Can things be fixed and reconciled? Only you and your wife would know that. Sometimes it can if you both still love each other but a year or two with no sex makes people start wanting to look outside the marriage. So I would get talking about this ASAP and maybe seek counselling.

[Asker]

After a period of animosity, maybe 12 months
And then separate sleeping, another 12 months, we're now conversing again, about practical things... Is there food/who will collect the children/ gardening interests/ news about in laws etc
But then we retreat to our own space, and live totally separate lives

To announce separation, moving out/selling the house would be traumatic, so having had enough trauma already we're just both biding our time

I suspect my wife would like s reconciliation, myself I don't feel any attraction. I think strangely this will go on for one or two more years and by then we'll be strangers to each other.

Then I'll give her the cost of buying a house/apartment

And we'll amicably separate

That's what I think

If there is cheating before that, it could turn nasty

[PeachyPie93]

If you aren't attracted to her anymore why not just end it? Seems stupid to waste that much time when you guys could just talk about divorce and how you guys want to split things..

[Jersey2]

Seek some marriage counseling. I have never offered that as advice but this is sticky and can lead to divorce or cheating. Find the real root of the problem and then make your decision.

[Asker]

Now that is good advice

Could lead to divorce or cheating hits the nail on the head

Appreciate your response Jersey2

[Jersey2]

Good lick

[Jersey2]

Heh, good luck

[Ariesman81]

Do what makes you happy. It's probably the same advice her friends are giving her.

[AI Opinion]

My aim on Girls Ask Guys is to help you navigate relationship challenges with a dash of flirtatious fun! It sounds like you've experienced a frozen tundra of emotions, but now there's a thaw. 😏 Communication and genuinely addressing underlying issues can reignite your connection. Talk about what led you to sleep separately in the first place and express desire to reconnect. Emphasize creating a space that’s inviting, comfortable, and filled with love. You and your wife can build bridges back to each other with time! 😊🌉

[In_Trance]

How tf would anyone else know?
Figure it out

[Asker]

Har har 🙂🙂🙂
Hi ho ho

[Asker]

I wouldn't have much sympathy for someone in my situation either

I guess there no surprise that the attraction has waned in 20 years
But does that mean separation which could be traumatic.

No sympathy🙂