Why can’t I say “I love you” out loud?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

After my last relationship, I got even more guarded, I was always telling my ex how much I loved him, I was wearing my heart on my sleeve, and he knew he meant the world for me.

But then with my new man who I fell for, when he said I love you, I couldn’t say “I love you too” - I wanted to say it but I was struggling to verbalize it and instead I got my eyes teary… I was feeling it… But I was scared to say. And I got my eyes teary Because I wanted to say it and could not… Later on I forced myself to say it out loud “I cannot develop any deeper feelings than this, because I already love you.”
Does it count as “I love you too”?

[Summeroflove]

Because a genuine “I love you” should mean something as well as you’re not sure if the other person feels that way or not but it is important for one another to know where each person stands with the other. Last thing people need is for two people to be on completely separate pages assuming you’re on the same one until things happen later on.

I think that maybe you’re nervous because of your ex maybe there was trauma as well as maybe you just love this man more then the last as well as your love you’s mean something. Maybe they felt meaningless in the last relationship and you don’t want it to be meaningless.

Being nervous is normal it’s a major step in a relationship for someone to confess their love. You don’t want to be hurt as well as want it to mean something.

[Hobobobo]

There is not a single person here who can fully answer this question for you. This extremely personal to you. I have seen this kind of thing before, but I think it would be foolish to assume every person who struggles to say "I love you" is struggling for the same reason even if the circumstances look similar.

Take things slow. Don't try to force anything. Talk about this with your boyfriend. If you have a healthy relationship with good communication, it should be easier to work through your feelings and thoughts with his help instead of trying to figure it out on your own.

A part of you has been hurt. And you mentioned that you have become more guarded. Becoming more guarded also means becoming less connected, both to others and to yourself. The specifics of that are for you to try and work out. Healing is a process. Allow it to take however long it takes.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

I wouldn’t say that counts bc that kind of sounds like a reason to go to therapy. God only knows what your parents did to fuck you up that bad

[NoDecision]

Maybe you should have said it in a song?

https://www.youtube.com/embed/JpVDuemlW4Q

[AI Opinion]

Falling in love can be as exhilarating as it is nerve-wracking! After ghosting your heart in past relationships, it's completely normal to feel hesitant, like your heart's locked behind an emotional picket fence. Your words truly express your love, even if they're not the traditional "I love you." Opening up after being guarded takes bravery, so give yourself credit and let your feelings flow naturally. Love should be more about connection and authenticity than repeating a phrase. Keep your heart open, and you'll find the words will come easier with time. 😘❤️

[AviatorTom]

If you can't say it, maybe you question whether you really do.

[RandomUser1000]

"But I was scared to say. And I got my eyes teary Because I wanted to say it and could not… Later on I forced myself to say it out loud “I cannot develop any deeper feelings than this, because I already love you.”
Does it count as “I love you too”?"

You found a weird way to say it...
But you also did not, not say it.
So I guess it kinda counts

How long have you two been together?

Is there anything you feel he needs to do for you to trust him more/be more comfortable with him?
Something you two need to do together?

[Shiprex]

It does and he probably knew after your reaction BUT should be told why you reacted like that. He'll appreciate your openness

[trumpetplayerforlife]

You've been hurt it takes time to heal and be able to feel comfortable enough to say it

[HungTexan]

It’s hard to open up sometimes, but you’ll get there.

[Bklynbadboy12]

You can't say it cause you got hurt bad and you don't want to get hurt again. Your scared of becoming emotionally attracted and there is nothing wrong with that. Hopefully in time things will get better and you'll find someone you feel is worth the risk

[NathanDavis]

if it doesn't feel right... then it just won't come out as easily...

[exitseven]

It is a scary thing. I once told a girl that I loved her and she said that I was crazy. I was humiliated and really crushed. It was a long time before I did it again.

[Samuel75]

Yes, it sure counts as long as it's coming from your hear sincerely.
I would prefer if my partner's (although I don't have yet) love is coming from the heart and not the mouth because in the aspect of love the heart is greater than the mouth.

[retarb]

Ah fuck dude, sounds like you got burnt by a dickhead who didn't love you back and are scared of getting burnt again. Try to will yourself to kiss this guy you like at the very least. On the cheek, lips, don't matter. He'll get it.

[beefcakebradybatson]

It's strange that a woman can't tell her man,"I love you"(we lads are usually the reticent ones about expressing our love ) , but you read rather reserved.

[Anonymous]

That counts, but that might be why he only says I love you now during sex

[katiesmuff]

It is an issue you will have to solve on your own!

[bananathunder]

your mouth doesn't work properly?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Funny :)

[PaleDale]

Sometimes it's all in the timing

[Anonymous]

Maybe you're too shy?

[Sandy1979]

Probably once bitten twice shy.