What do you do to stop hurting from the past?

Question

I’ve had to deal with betrayal not only from my partner but also from family members. I’ve chosen to forgive them and don’t have any lingering animosity towards them but some days the images of their betrayal just pops back up in my mind and I feel all the pain again. I had to take a breather and remind myself that it was all in the past but how do I stop these thoughts from popping back up?

ohsheeT · Accepted Answer

The best thing for me is To acknowledge it, accept it and let it go. There's nothing you can do about it nowadays, except for move on. That was yesterday starting new one today.
The more you hold on to it

Good morning , it holds you back and that's just not worth it

Because no You're allowing it to kick your ass 2 times. Because whatever it was.
You're letting it beat you again

And now you are older wiser smarter. You make the choice to allow it to win or not win let it go because your the only person on the inside. Of you. No one else is.

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

You just move on best way you can because those memories of betrayal will not go away , you can forgive someone, but you never forget , sometimes it’s best to distance yourself from that person all together so you can start a new chapter in your life

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

I'm here to sprinkle some insight and joy into your love life! Betrayal is a real heart tug, but it's awesome that you've found a path to forgiveness. 😌 It's perfectly natural for old wounds to sneak back into your thoughts. Try channeling those flashbacks into something positive, like a new hobby, meditation, or focusing on the love in your life now. 🤗 Remind yourself that you've grown from the experience and deserve joy. You're stronger than your past! 🌟 Keep going and let your radiant future outshine the shadows! 💖

FelJa · Answer

Tbh I don't think there's one right answer and it will be different for everyone. I do think time heals pain however if you just corner yourself in a hole for 5 years I don't think the pain will ever go away. I believe you gotta push on and try carry on with your life, make new experiences and make new relationships with people who actually care about you. I honestly don't think a relationship that has been effected by betrayal can ever fully recover, you can put animosity to the side and try go on with them but that feeling will always be deep in there and I think that's alright. You just have to accept it and make new relationships with new people and learn from the past to spot people who actually care about you, this will never be easy but it's the only thing you can do. You don't need a big circle of friends and loved ones, just a strong one, I wish you the best of luck 🙏

Oncewildtwiceburned · Answer

At your age I had already been jumped in a few fights, caught some shrapnel in from an rpg in Iraq, ostracized by a small community due to my family name, and slowly became addicted to opiates in part by courtesy of the red white blue. A few years later almost beat to death for a insurance money and possibly a perceived stake in some property by the party that orchestrated the hit.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

You can't, but the best way to deal with them is how you'll move forward, loving from a distance is always a option, or moving forward completely doesn't mean you haven't forgiven, you can forgive and move on, forgiveness means you have no more grudges or anger in your heart towards them, just move differently.

Jove79 · Answer

Time heals wounds. For now.. self improvement, invest in your hobby.. Keep yourself occupied. Staying positive is all you have. Talk to friends about it too. If all else fails, and you feel stuck with anger and resentment.. maybe it’s time for therapy.. they can release years of built up emotions I’ve heard.

nawtee_me · Answer

Are you sure you have truly forgiven them or just went through the motions? If you truly forgave them then when it pops up again you would not have all of those feeling coming back. If you want help let me know and I will pray with you about it.

strateguy632 · Answer

You can't stop memories but you can notice when such memories surface and reply "now is too late to change anything, so i need to focus on the "now".

Shiprex · Answer

Time will be your friend @kitkatto that these memories created a strong emotional impact on you will mean it will be a long time if ever where they will not come back.

serious · Answer

There is no well defined answer to this. Unfortunately. Everyone has their own way of coping with things. I hope you are okay though.

jahaims · Answer

Wanting to forgive and actually forgiving are two different things. You know what they did was bad enough you should cut them off but you don't have healthy boundaries.

Godihateyou · Answer

Chuck it in the fuck it bucket amd move on. We are only here for a very little while. Stop wasting your precious seconds on people that don't care about you.

Renegade_Sailor · Answer

Remember, an apology without change is a manipulation.

Lokiion · Answer

Just keep moving forward as direct as that sounds to that’s probably the only way

Staximus · Answer

You can get rid of your "partner" but unfortunately you can't choose your family

Sluttt · Answer

Just have to accept that life is shit. All men are shit all women are shit

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I generally don't keep betrayers in my life.

Eempriyanka · Answer

(time is relative) ok? You're free

WhitneySnow · Answer

Therapy really helps

Babebytheshore85 · Answer

Why are u still with them? Get some self respect

Agape93 · Answer

I push the pain down

dinojames22 · Answer

You don't.. you just deal with it and move on.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

Do things that make you happy

Anonymous · Answer

Maybe you should try meditation, or yoga.

itsannalee · Answer

See psychiatrist

Catailian94 · Answer

Take a time-out to work on myself.

Jennz6 · Answer

Just move on

PeterLegg91 · Answer

It'll take time you'll heal completely

MasterKS · Answer

Move on with the new.

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Have you tried marijuana?

In_Trance · Answer

let it go

What do you do to stop hurting from the past?

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