What’s your go-to method for recovering after an argument?

[DreamCrescent]

Do you just hope enough time passed, act like nothing happened, and proceed with your life and relationship like business as usual? Do you apologize in a timely manner? Do you make sure not to go to bed upset? Do you hug and show affection right away? Do you need your feelings communicated and need to feel heard before you move on?

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

It's much more efficient, and much more relaxing to go for injury prevention than going crazy with recovery methods. Looking at causes of arguments instead of fighting incessantly with consequences.

Understanding the roots of arguments presupposes understanding who we're facing, who we are, how they work, how we work, why we work the way we work. It isn't easy, it isn't intuitive, and I couldn't do any of that in my 20's. But time, knowledge and intelligence helped.

[DreamCrescent]

indeed wisdom and experience are the answer to pretty much everything

[DJB72]

Depends on two things

• Who was demonstrably at fault - I'll apologise if it was me
• Who started it

I don't go looking for arguments. I don't start them deliberately and I'm always ready to defend my perspective.


Recovery? If you picked the fight then you'd either need to prove I'm wrong or apologise. I don't apologise if I wasn't at fault for the sake of keeping the peace. Ultimately it doesn't make a lasting peace.

[DreamCrescent]

i liked your response

for some reason

[DJB72]

Thanks. It's a technique I call "honesty" 😉

[kaleshigirl]

My rule of thumb never sleep before resolving an argument. Usually I cry then get tired. Mu husband needs time to calm down and when he does he comes to me hugs me and we talk and settle the matter before sleeping

[DreamCrescent]

good answer. valid feelings

sounds like you and husband are in sync

[FreyaRed]

I let the time to work in my favor. I provoke sometimes an argument but I'm never emotional, that makes me difficult for people who want to play with emotions

[Beckybooboo]

I tend to get over an argument pretty quick but he doesn't! I'll try to hug him and tell him that I'm over it and I don't want him to be mad. He'll basically avoid my hugs and walk away 😔 After a while he'll act like nothing happened.

[DreamCrescent]

he needs his time to feel his feelings

do you find yourself okay with giving him that?

[Ironco]

It gets me in trouble, but I'm a stubborn German. If I feel I've been treated badly and have not done anything wrong, I pull away and ignore the person or problem.

Right or wrong, it's what I've always done. I give the person one chance to explain their side. Then, I move forward and onward.

It takes me awhile to re-establish communication with the person, but who knows, maybe someday.

[DreamCrescent]

that’s one way

thank you for sharing and i wasn’t looking for right ways. I’m more trying to understand all the different mechanisms people resort to in the face of conflict

[Ironco]

Lol, oh that's easy...
I usually tell them to "Go fuck yourself"
😜

[dustybiker2]

Don't argue to begin with.
If you are fighting you aren't listening to or respecting each other. Fix the communication issue.

[Shiprex]

Always try to resolve it and time may be the worst enemy for this as it can breed resentment and distrust.

[DreamCrescent]

indeed

how do you know the other person id open to resolving or they need space to sit with their feelings?

[Shiprex]

You don't know but have to approach it with kindness in the hope that you both can get into a headspace where the resolution is more important than the disagreement. Try to explore the subject area to find any common ground then seek to build bridges BUT not to convert unless one learns or realises something wrong about their understanding.
It's important to seek an understanding of each other

[WhitneySnow]

All those things are valid, but I usually just ignore it and hope it goes away

[DreamCrescent]

generally sweeping under the rug isn’t the worst response lol

[WhitneySnow]

Thanks 😂

[Plugs]

Ignoring u hurt someone’s feelings and expecting to act like everything is ok is insulting to them

[slatyb]

We talk through our feelings without blaming the other, and apologize if it's appropriate.

[glennos89]

I need things to be cleared first with a good and honest conversation

[trumpetplayerforlife]

I go shopping and wait for him to apologize

[DreamCrescent]

can’t say i was expecting this response

[trumpetplayerforlife]

Just what happens when they spoil you all the time lol

[D_Bone_Steak]

I just get rid of their body.

[lorenzomichael]

A couple of shots of Jack Daniels and I’m fine.

[Ariesman81]

Hate fuckin

[DreamCrescent]

oh boy

[msc545]

I sleep.

[DreamCrescent]

and when you wake up, everything is all better?

i think i’ve done that before. slept pff the upset

[HeartShapedHaze]

Be alone