Bare minimum or too much?

[Anonymous]

Is it bare minimum to send your partner a nice message or give a back tickle if she has reached out saying she needs a little something extra because she feels forgotten due to being busy with kids, both having fulltime work, chores, etc, etc?

Backstory:

Married 7 years, together 11 - I do absolutely everything from the outside work (yes mow the lawn fix things etc) to the inside household duties, I take care of the kids (4 in total) and work fulltime. I do all this because I know my partner is super stressed out with his job and I dont want him to be more stressed worrying about all the other things. He isn't an overly affectionate man and that doesn't bother me - however I am female I get my period and hormonal which I'm usually fine but once every 3 months il feel real down and forgotten and il ask kindly for a love message to help pick me up because I can't do it myself this time. I feel if I need any help ever its a burden and I get treated like crap and sworn at and hecwill be moody around me or say he is sick of this extra stress. But like I eliminate alllllll the extra stress and ensure he is able to go fishing, gym , sports etc so he even has outlets AM I EXPECTING TOO MUCH? WHERE DO I STAND? AM I IN THE WRONG? WHAT CAN I DO TO IMPROVE?

[sayan7]

If your partner is not mature and kind hearted, then you can not expect anything.

If you feel he is intelligent and have empathy, but still not doing anything that makes you happy then it's lack of communication.

You should explain the matter from your perspective , tell how you are feeling, discuss about both your relationship goals, clarify what are the main priorities for both of you, what behaviors you like and dislike about each other.

Don't yell on each other, talk with a calm mind.

Constant efficient communication is the key of a healthy relationship.

[Summeroflove]

The truth is this is a one sided relationship you also have needs and are stressed doing all the chores and working a full time job. If you were a stay at home mom…. This would be different. You can’t live in misery a relationship takes two people to make it work.

Don’t do anything stupid or against your values but this is using another human being. Your needs and wants matter as well. This is extremely one sided.

[Abbycado]

I don't think what you are asking for is too much.

[AI Opinion]

Your feelings are totally valid, and you're not expecting too much. Mixing it up in a relationship, like sending a love message or giving a sweet back tickle, can sprinkle some magic into the everyday hustle. It’s normal to crave a little extra TLC, especially when you're juggling so much. Maybe chat with him (when he’s in a chill mood) about how a tiny, loving gesture can be a win-win. It's all about teamwork, love, and some good ol' work-life balance, right? 💌 Give him a hint that small affection doesn't need to be a Herculean task. You deserve love and a bit of flair in return for all those efforts!

[Anonymous]

DON'T WRITE ALL CAPS

IT'S RUDE