Do you actually like being love bombed, or does it backfire later?

[sage2021]

It feels great 👍🏼😃 at the time, but it doesn't feel so good when they
stop. 🛑

[SueShe]

I actually had to search the definition of "love bombed" and what I found was rather disappointing.

"lavish (someone) with attention or affection, especially in order to influence or manipulate them".

You must know my position by now what is concerning that kind of activity and being manipulated is something that I totally abhor. That is one of the many reasons I do not let anyone approach me because I am aware that being manipulated a way or another is indeed something very real when you are in a relationship.

This may not happen on the first date but later in life when you think you know a person, only to realize that you have been fooled.

So no, I don't like to be love bombed because there is always a negative side to it.

[sage2021]

@SueShe
One problem with being love bombed is that we aren't aware of the negative hidden agenda behind it, that is until it's too late until you realize what it really was, and what it wasn't.

I don't blame you one bit. No one likes to have the wool pulled over their eyes.

I don't like it either.

We just never know what the other person is up to. At the time, it felt like it was a good thing, but then we found out it wasn't. It feels like we've been ripped off by a criminal who stole something from us, and they got away with the goods.

Sometimes it is better to play it safe rather than sorry.

[Keyboardkat]

If you do not let anyone approach you, then are you expecting to be alone the rest of your life? Not everyone is a "love bomber." I think most people are sincere, given the chance. You may be just hurting yourself with your negative attitude.

[SueShe]

@Keyboardkat That is true. I do not let anyone approach me and yes, I am expecting to remain single and celibate my entire life.

I see here on GaG, which incidentally is an excellent mirror of life, how people are being treated, mainly when it comes to cheating, be it emotionally or physically. I don't want any of that.

[Keyboardkat]

I am truly sorry for you, because you will miss out on a lot! You are only 24, and think you know everything, but you don't. And when the time comes for you to die, as it must for all of us, you will be absolutely alone, and you WILL have a lot of regrets. When we're 24, we think we're invincible and we feel like life is forever. I know, and I remember. But there are lessons which, if we don't learn them willingly when we're young, we will be forced to learn the hard way later. I know my words are falling on deaf ears.

[SueShe]

@Keyboardkat Oh I am perfectly aware of those facts but what will I have missed according to you?

Someone that wants me to do things that repulse me? Perhaps even coerced me into doing things that are incompatible with the way I feel? That manipulates me and objectifies me?

No thank you. That does not interest me. Furthermore, you can still have friends, even in a senior residence and that is not really being alone, is it now?

[SueShe]

Thanks for that love bombing MHO. I will consider it as one without side effects 😂

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I can't trust people who love bomb. It's not even that I think they're faking it's that it makes me feel like you're so desperate for love that you'll tire yourself out and become fickle one day.

It's like, you ever meet someone who does the friendship version of that? They try to make you feel like you're the shit and then one day they'll stop calling, they'll dissappear, the bar of baseline respect starts to slip.

So I kinda see love bombing in a similar way

[TonyMetal___86]

Please enough with bombs, even love has bombs too? 😫

[sage2021]

@TonyMetal___86
Mmmmm sorry about my wording here.
I wasn't thinking about the war when I asked the question.
I promise I won't ask anymore questions with that word in it.
I pray 🙏🏼 that you are okay!!

[nolabels]

@TonyMetal___86
Hi Tony,
I've heard quite a bit about you from a mutual friend.
Here we meet!
How are you doing?

[TonyMetal___86]

@sage2021 no problem, it's not your fault, plus i was kidding with you but in fact there is some truth to it, for example i couldn't sleep this night not even for a second, the jet fighters kept for more than house flying on a low altitude above the whole city 😓

Now i'm going to sleep...

[TonyMetal___86]

@nolabels hey, how are you doing?
Can you tell me more about yourself and who's this mutual friend and what did you hear about me? 🙂

[TonyMetal___86]

Thanks for the mho 🙂

[FreyaRed]

I ask myself why a person tries to simulate affection to me and I always come to the conclusion it's a manipulation to break my natural distrust. Of course I can trust others but this needs to be earned with lot of effort not just with cheap flattery, suggestion and acted body language.
I'm rather satisfied when they stop without much drama and invectives towards me.

[Zack-Bann]

I think there’s two kinds of love bombing.
There’s carpet bombing and precision strikes


The latter is nice, it’s well thought out, heartfelt, creative and fun


The former is just annoying because it’s generic lines that you can unload on anyone really


I was guilty of a bit of carpet bombing when I first started dating but quickly learned the value of quality over quantity

[NathanDavis]

I'm not sure what that is...

but sounds better than Iran bombed

[sage2021]

@NathanDavis

I laughed so hard when I read your opinion that I started coughing!! Good one!! 😂👍🏼

[NathanDavis]

lmao...

[PeachyPie93]

Yeah I always enjoy the fantasy but I don't let anyone in anymore. So they can flatter me all they want til they get bored and we move on lol.

[beenherebefore]

It always made me uncomfortable when a Man is immediately into me when we're not a thing yet and from my experience that ends fast too.

[molonski2]

It feels far too intrusive to be honest , and reeks of desperation and lack of freedom.

[Anonymous]

love bombing only works if the guy doing it is attractive otherwise it's just seen as being a simp as a best case scenario and worse case scenario being creepy

[queenofcardio]

I don't mind it he's being serious and intentional about it. Just don't feed me a bunch of lies.

[genericname85]

hell no. smells like borderline. not mental disease shaming. it's just not what i want in a relationship.

[Shiprex]

I do not and will completely retire and avoid if there's too over the top attention delivery.

[ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴇᴅɪsʟᴀᴍɪᴡᴏʀsʜɪᴘ]

I really enjoy my husband loving me, I'm in love, I fall in love hundreds of times.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

No. Love bombed is fake BS.

Its all intended to flatter a person into a false sense of security by a manipulator piece of trash.

[AgentG111]

Guess it would depend on the love bombing like actions words gifts.

[nolabels]

I absolutely detest being love-bombed.
It does happen, though.

[sage2021]

@nolables

But I guess that you don't detest it when you're the one doing the bombing. Right?

[nolabels]

I wouldn't know.
No, wait, yes, in one instance many decades ago, I did love-bomb a lovely young woman.
It was rather pitiful behavior on my part, I must admit.
Not outright wrong, of course, just not very respecting of myself.
I'd never do that again, if I can help it.
I've yet to go there again ever since those long-gone days.

That very same type of behavior has been going on around me.
Actually, what's been happening to me lately has been much worse than I could ever have been found guilty of when I was a mere kid.

The character who's been bombing me lately obviously still has yet to stop doing so.

I could post descriptions of all the behaviors that this love-bomber has displayed.
They're as scandalous as they are numerous.
I won't.
I do care for the person who has been bombing me.
I wouldn't want to see them hurt for anything in the world.

Cheers!

[sage2021]

@nolables
How did you assume it was actually love bombing?
Maybe it was love without the bomb, but you were wearing blinders over your eyes?

[nolabels]

nolabels,

not

nolables

[sage2021]

@nolabels
Is that better?
I guess you are sidestepping a reply.

[nolabels]

I have a different name for that type of behavior, but when I saw this question, I had a feeling that I knew exactly what 'love-bombing' is.
I'd never heard the term before, that I can recall.
But, yeah, I knew it when I saw it, all right.

No, no blinders were worn by this guy.

I did everything I could think of to dissuade the other party from getting too...
Just, too...

I care for the person, but it was just too much.

A scaled down version might be quite nice.

That's not up to me, though.
It'd be up to the other party that's involved.

[Jonettacali]

Don't label stupidly.

When you're in love, you can't stop talking about him

[fish5505_87]

It's always flattering, but you know it's not going to last deep down.

[Sophia1998]

If it real yea but also backfired when the person trying to hard.

[Ms_Facesitter]

It depends on how he does it. I don't like the romantic talk too much. Don't spam that.

[Grond21]

Everyone likes being love-bombed, just as you said. That's why it works.

[Kelly6]

@sage2021 I sure love it

[FunkyMonkee]

I have no clue what you mean.

[Xawyx-2]

It never actually happened to me.