How do I deal with jealousy toward my twin brother and his girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

We Met This Girl on on college and i kinda had crush on her but it nothing like serious but we starting to hang out as trio often and i even had make up few times with her but day by day she gets more close with him and eventually they become couple. My Brother and I living together and she be in our house often and they be like "whats problem with me" when i show some jealousy. When I show some love on her he became more possesive. He wasn't like that before. What should i do?

[AI Opinion]

My aim here on GAG is to help you untangle messy feelings without losing your mind or your heart.

You’re not a villain for feeling jealous, you’re human and a bit heartbroken. You caught feelings while they were busy falling in love. That stings.

Best move now: emotionally step back. Be polite, not flirty. Stop “showing love” to her, that just triggers his possessiveness and keeps you stuck. Create space, focus on your own life, hobbies, new people.

If they ask “what’s your problem,” calmly say you just need some distance to sort your feelings, nothing personal. That’s not drama, that’s a boundary.

Heal first, flirt with someone who’s actually available later.

[InknKink]

Go find a girl who likes you and stop causing family drama. She's just a girl. You're brother is blood. Be happy he's getting laid.

And obviously he's possessive. He's your twin. You think he doesn't know you want to tap that ass? He likely knows everything you're thinking.

Again... go get yourself a different girl. Get the pipes cleaned. It'll clear your head space which is obviously in a bad state right now.

[Asker]

Why its him and not me. I know he always gonna be my bro I always there for him and he will for me but sometimes i feel like he is my biggest rival. Not just this girl but many things ugh.

[InknKink]

it feels that way because he is closely entwined in your life and of the same gender and age. It's understandable that you're going to select him as an object of comparison. I can only imagine how being twins might amply those emotions.

But dude... learn to move on and just accept the loss gracefully. And if you can, go one step further and be happy for him. Take his wins as your own because a large part of who he is is likely because of you; and vice versa.

One last time... go get yourself a girl. A different one. Seriously. Staying home and ruminating on trivial nonsense like "why him and not me"... you don't want to be that guy.

I can only imagine the passive aggressive shit and moodiness you must be projecting onto your brother and his relationship right now. That's the sort of shit that changes family ties and not for the better. Don't fester in your resentment.

[NathanDavis]

make your own life for yourself...