Why can’t I find a relationship?

[Anonymous]

No matter how much I try I can’t find a guy who actually want a relationship and want to be serious with me. What’s this all about?

Updates

8 h

I used to find a relationship easily and now it’s getting older as I turn 30. What could be reasons for this?

Updates

8 h

When they do want an actual relationship they don’t wanna be with me. I find the bizarre to me! How come?

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to help you decode love, red flags, and all that messy dating drama 💋

You’re not the problem just because guys don’t commit. A lot of men want situationships, attention, or sex, not responsibility. Check your “picker”: are you drawn to emotionally unavailable guys, lovebombers, or players? Raise your standards, slow things down, and let actions prove intentions. The right guy won’t keep you guessing.

[BCRanger10]

I think one a big reason why is because people have spent so much time and effort preparing for careers, but not enough preparing for life. Making a career is one thing, but making something with it is a different matter entirely.

On that note, would you say you personally are more oriented towards pursuing a career or towards settling down and becoming a wife and mom?

Another is that men and women, from what I'm gathering these days, really seem to hate, resent, and mistrust each other. Political views, cultural views and values, unrealistic standards, general attitudes, there are all sorts of issues at play here.

As for you personally, I'd take a good and close look at how you're approaching relationships and what kind of messages and signals you're putting out there (attitude, dress, etc.), because it honestly sounds like those are core issues here. Also, what kind of man do you want to be with and what kind of men are you actually selecting?

[lightbulb27]

we'd have to know you to critique rather than being a pink blob and some text. I see gals finding them getting married and such at ages older than you and younger.

Theory... I suspect as you get more desperate at this age, becomes a turn off. Guys don't like desperate pressures... can smell it... to be relaxed and have an escape hatch due to fear is good. So it's a sales job required, kinda like when Luke Skywalker started into his training in the 2nd movie... he was dumb and scared but had no idea what was coming.. a lot of guys are like that and escape to get their jollies with their lightsavers somewhere else. And a lot of women made that possible, to have fun with their lightsavers, which is causing you troubles.

yea I know there are mispellings, I don't care, I'm over 60, I'm allowed to mispell, be a little funny, and share an opinion...

So, going to have to figure out the formula... which might involve Cheerios and milk, cookies and milk, or other ideas. It cannot be easy out there. May the "Force" be with you.

@midnightmoon05

[Anonymous]

A lot of guys want a committed relationship. But most women friend zone them and try to change the drug addicted, section 8, drug addict, mafia or gang banger type of guy into a good a good hard working 6 figure man because of romantic comedies and erotic-fiction books that they consume.

There are plenty of guys with a 6 figure income nowadays looking for a relationship. But they usually give up on it because they realize you're after the degenerate type of guys.

And if those degenerate guys have money they are usually the Paul and Buster murdaugh type of guys who are psychopaths. Hence why women usually complain about abusive men.

The majority of men don't like seeing women get hurt, no criminal record and have job with a stable income. When a woman is on Tik Tok complaining about a broke a man they are usually talking about their hook ups, friends with benefits's and situationships they want to change into good men.

So yes there are a lot of men interested in what you want they understand you're not interested in them, so they don't want waste their time with you and look for someone else.

And no it's not because you're turning 30. There are plenty of women looking better than a plain looking early 20s woman.

Especially with retinoid cream and alpha hydroxy acid they are looking they are still looking like they are 21 at 34.

All the skincare cosmetics products you are possible using and even plastic surgery if you felt necessary. You can still get a guy in your 30s no problem.

The problem is what you want which is to change the guy it is not realistic. But you don't have to change yourself because of what anyone says. Just do what you want.

The world is probably going to end in maybe the century and will be a terrible place for your grand kids. So just have a blast.

[MrChinaski]

Women become less physically attractive, less fertile and more jaded.

If you've lived your life well then you have developed as a person, have well-informed views on the world, have travelled, been educated, pursued meaningful outcomes, overcome the mental baggage of youth, have developed grace and can hold a compelling conversation. That's more important than looks anyway.

Being jaded is a life choice.

Fertility is biology. You are stuck with that.

[FreyaRed]

Maybe you should change your style. Specific styles attract specific types.
If you look like a pro on customers catch, don't expect you attract guys who look for long term relationships.

[Nikki1989]

Many men don't make themselves approachable. They want a relationship but are not prepared to do anything about it.

[Anonymous]

It means u don’t want a real long term relationship

[Asker]

I do want a long term relationship

[Opinion Owner]

You don’t. What do u want in a guy?

[Anonymous]

A lot of guys don't want a relationship. Just keep trying.

[slatyb]

Where are you looking?

[Asker]

I’m looking on dating sites

[slatyb]

That can take a while, and it will depend on whether you share values with the people near you. I was on match in Dallas some years ago and there were only a dozen or so women who were somewhat interesting. About one new possibility appeared each week. Now I live in Seattle where there are a lot more women who share my values. I'm married, not dating, but location can make a huge difference.