Why does my new boyfriend constantly disappear at night?

[Anonymous]

When we first met he went missing for like a weekend but I didn't think too much of it because we just met. Well, every night at around the exact same time (10ish) he is driving home from his mom's and says he just made it home and will call me when he is settled. Of course, he never calls. The first few times I just assumed he showered and was too tired but after the fourth time I decided to call his phone and he did not answer nor respond to my text. The next morning he just said sorry for missing your call last night I was asleep! So I expressed my concern and he said I was over reacting. Well as usual every night the same thing so I stopped expecting a call after 10p. Well last night I tried to return his call at 9p and his phone was completely off. I text him that it is best we are friends and that I do not want to continue pursuing anything. He said he dropped his phone in water while playing football and that he took the sims card out and put it in his friends phone this morning until he can get a new phone when he gets off. I still stuck to my gut feeling and told him I'm sorry but this is too soon for this many coincidences at night. Am I over reacting?

Updates

+1 y

Yeah, he's never called back after that time.

Updates

+1 y

Yeah, I cut him off. His response was that I am making him pay for the mistakes of my last boyfriend who cheated on me. I just said sorry you feel that way (via text)...

Updates

+1 y

Well, we have communicated and decided to be friends and take things slow. I am starting to see other people and not invest so much time into getting to know just him. So basically if we are meant to be we will be and then I will be but until then I am not giving him girlfriend treatment nor privelages since he isn't doing his part to deserve them.

[Anonymous]

trust your gut, when there is smoke there is fire, it sounds very suspicious to me and I was in a similar situation with a guy, he wasn't my boyfriend but we were dating and it seemed that he would sometimes disappear and was only available certain times, at first I overlooked it because I didn't want to be too "pushy" but after a while when you just become too suspicious it is usually for good reason and better to move away. I don't know for sure but I am fairly worried that he is either married or in a committed relationship with another woman and I certainly hope not because I would never knowingly get involved with a guy like that

[rdabby]

I say wait till he calls back, if he was doing shady stuff he wouldn't even call. .. But again if he wasent doing anything at all and you re just being paranoid and he was sleeping then he'd be pissed and won't call either..

I have to say you over reacted as you ve just started going out so maybe he doesn't like to talk on the phone or maybe his mother is sick or maybe he's married..? I don't know, maybe you should have asked what's up first then act on it...

Anyhow if he really likes you he would call you back regardless.. yeah

[CrystalMinds]

To be honest, I wouldn't trust it either. Ok, you can miss a call by being asleep, you can drop your phone in water, ... but all days in a row? Has he NEVER called you back at that time or answered when you called around that time?

If not: I'd be too curious and ask him what that's all about.

It could be that what he says is true though...but I'm a bit of a suspicious person when it comes to stuff like that :-)

[CrystalMinds]

Ask him what that's all about, one or two times, okay, but EVERY time? I'd ask what's going on...

[vmw2008]

Your gut was right. It's too soon for him to be breaking that many promises and being shady at night. It's supposed to be the honeymoon phase...if that's him at his best behavior, I'd hate to see how he is at his worst.

[Moloch]

Over reacting. Give the man space. I'm sure he talks to you throughout the day.

[CrystalMinds]

Good choice! (from your last update)

[Anonymous]

You made a good move. :))

[Opinion Owner]

Lol that's a classic move a guy can pull, gees that behavior is so bad! They keep wanting to put their feet deeper in the mud even when it's the end.

[Anonymous]

wow that's weird sounds like he is cheating