Search Results: second chances

I have heard about it. Men saying that it is women mistake if she is single is her 30s or late 20s. but how?

Because she was dating good looking dude? So women shouldn't date someone who they find attractive? Because for some reason a good looking can pump and dump you?

I mean if I started relationship with long term intention. Then isn't it his mistake if he lie?

And they always talk about giving chance to uglier nice guy. But how do you know if this niceness is fake or real. And ugly guy are capable of doing too. And second I used to be fat. I was bullied by guys because of it. I seriously don't want to have kids with a ugly dude. Because it could mean a ugly daughter. And ugly women suffer.

And why would I date someone if there is 0 attraction. Men never do it. Why should women?

If I like his personality but don't find him attractive. Then he would be a friend. I like many men and women personality. Lol

Men always imagine that it happen because women were only into short term relationship. Dude I never have been in short term relationship. Have 0 interest in hook up. But it is possible that I might be single at 30s. because men lie/cheat/abuse you. I don't think it would be good idea to stay with a guy if he beat me. Because he can beat our kids too. I don't want that for my kid's. How is my mistake if he lied about being interested in long term relationship? Or cheat?

I'm 40, and recently broke up with my boyfriend (47) of 11 months. We had hundreds of days filled with highs, he is social, charming, has a lot of friends, loves going out, having fun. He was very sweet, romantic and caring during these times. There were red flags that I tried to rationalize- binge drinking multiple times a week, crippling debt from student loans and cc (>200K), no career motivation and health issues that started popping up (probably from drinking). We had 6-7 arguments over the last year, that I thought were heated but never out of control (and always under the influence of alcohol). The next day we'd both apologize and move on. I realized he'd get overwhelmed then, and sometimes even at the smallest disagreement or when I needed to vent (when both were sober). I showed concern about his health and debt and the stupid fights that happened while drinking. Asked him to cut back, but he was super defensive and in denial. Fast forward to the new year, we were going to move in together and he was going to propose. He suddenly started acting disinterested and cold and last week suddenly declares he doesn't want to move in together. I'm taken aback and ask why, and he brings up the fights and that it's too frequent. I ask if he's overwhelmed with all his issues, and he admits he is, but keeps blaming me for the fights. I say I'll work on being more understanding and only bring up stuff while we're both sober and in a calm way, but I can't change the past, only do better in the future. He's reluctant to accept my words and I finally ask in frustration if he wants to break up. He says he doesn't know what wants, but needs time on his own to think. Over the next 3 weeks, I don't hear from him and he ignores my call and texts, forcing me to text and email him an official breakup note. Rationally, I know he's not good for me in his current state, but my heart still loves him. I want to know if a man like this can change. Does he deserve a second chance?