What to do with a situationship with coworker, who’s got his rebound pregnant and feelings for both me and her are still involved?

[Anonymous]

Hi there, I really need your advice and help in this one, because I’m in dark place right now and feeling like falling apart. This story may sound like a movie script or some mixed misunderstandings and unfortunate events, but this is my life now. So two years ago I’ve met this guy on work. We have quite an age difference, so even though I was very attracted to him, I couldn’t commit right a au even though he wanted it badly. With time passing, we become very good close friends, he helped me through depression episode, we talked a lot with topics seemed never ending. So, when I already healed and felt a ground under my feet, he asked if I will be mad at him for dating someone. At first I said that it’s not my call and he can do whatever he wants, but he kept triggering me with “You don’t sound too happy about it”, so we had an honest talk and I said everything. How I feel about him, why I couldn’t make any move before… But he doesn’t care. He was repeating that we missed each other and it’s just a bad timing. Turns out, he’s already dating someone for month and a half. I can’t stop crying and feeling tremendous guilt that I didn’t even got a second chance, that he walked away. I did so many mistakes, I believed we still have a chance. Maybe I’m just not good enough. I feel tremendous pain. I can’t get him out of my mind and heart. After final talk I couldn’t sleep for two days. Fast forward, at the end of last year we really got close again, he told me that he’s about to dump his rebound, but till then we need to keep boundaries. I agreed only to find out week ago that his rebound got pregnant. She claimed that she’s taking pills and he believed her. He planned to tell her it’s over after New Year’s Eve, but she surprised him on the first day of Christmas with baby. All together he’s claiming to still have feeling for me and for her, but he can’t leave her now. Cherry on the top - we are working together in one team and I don’t want to change my job.

[Jkgordon]

You are wasting too much time on this useless relationship. He got another girl pregnant didn’t marry her WHY do you put him on a pedestal? Move on get a hobby do things with your time. Most importantly LOVE YOURSELF !!
Do you have a favorite purse or shoes?

[Asker]

Thank you for the response. See, we are not always choosing who we are attracted to. I’m agree with you on useless part, and even having hobbies and friends doesn’t help much when you are still on this acute phase of a “breakup”.
Interesting question about bags and shoes, yes I do.

[Jkgordon]

I’m pretty sure you love your bags and shoes Apply this same love for yourself.
Here’s the key: for you, you have to make yourself despise him or even hate to get over him. SELF LOVE!!!
I won't ALLOW ***** TO TREAT ME LIKE SECOND BEST
HE GOT ANOTHER FEMALE PREGNANT SO ALL THIS HE LOVED ME IS A BUNCH OF BULLSHIT (now did you ever have sex with him)
If you did picture the same moves with the pregnant girl THAT SHOULD MAKE YOU HATE HI. TO LOVE YOURSELF
FYI- for her to be pregnant proves they had a lot of sex or was lucky to do it when she ovulated
You can’t possibly want to waste your thoughts thinking about a guy who hit another girl pregnant that’s not his wife and trying to convince you to be an ass and hang on lol please block and delete and clean up your home do something other than wasting your energy on this piece of garbage~

[Staximus]

This is what happens when you fuck around with your coworkers. It's called shitting in your own backyard. I don't even know what the big deal is here. The guy is not even your boyfriend and he's screwing around with some other woman. Stop being stupid and worrying about your office fuckboy.

[Asker]

Is it really matter if someone your “official” bae? I don’t think so. When it comes to human interactions we are less logical than we would like to be. Hope no one will call you stupid for being human and having feelings bro.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

I don't think there's anything wrong with dating someone you work with, what's wrong is so called "situationships" and dating f-boys that get other women pregnant.

[Asker]

I’m strongly agree with you on this one, if we could predict who’s particular person going to be and how to show up, we wouldn’t need to ask questions like this or be wrecked by all kind of situations.

[Anonymous]

I would say, end the romance/drama with him and keep that relationship strictly business. Try focusing on yourself and if you’re so inclined, finding a healthier romantic relationship 💛

[Asker]

Thank you so much! Yes, I’m doing my best right now to do use on work and studying, but sometimes it’s hard when we see each other…
Lots of hugs for you!

[Opinion Owner]

I hear you. It might be rough for a while but it will get easier. Hang in there, your future self will thank.

[Anonymous]

What is a "situationship" and why is this in the holiday section?

[Asker]

Sorry, I’m kinda new here. Situationship because just couple of weeks ago this dude claimed (and for the longer time) that he wants to be with me. Even said that he imagines our future life together 😂

[boobliker]

just bad luck on him

[Asker]

Indeed, having a crazy ex wife also not much of a help.