Search Results: losing a love

To expand on this, there is this idea that being a parent is very different from wanting a baby.

To want a baby is to want to have something adorable to take care of, something cute that looks like you, that you can dress up how you like, that's completely reliant on you to teach it what it needs. Wanting a baby is wanting something that looks like you that you can bond with on a one-sided basis as babies are not smart enough to comprehend what a bond is, only that you provide them with food and love and shelter and give them what they need when they need it. They are totally helpless and you are helping them happily and find reward in taking care of them, but once the child begins to show signs of their own autonomy that begins to change.

Being a parent means being ready to help a child discover who they are, build on their autonomy, support them and learn new things about this child as they discover these new things, guiding them towards the path that is right for them even if it's one you disagree with on some level (i. e. religious parents helping their queer child be more comfortable being out to them). Being a parent means understanding that you are sacrificing for the sake of someone else and not only willingly accepting that but embracing it because watching your child become an adult is rewarding, despite all of the time you spend losing sleep, losing money, and losing energy to help your baby grow into a child, then a teenager, then an adult.