Search Results: getting rejected

Just curious. If you really liked someone and maybe don't confess you feelings would that hurt more in the long term (decades) than getting rejected right there and then?

There is an attractive younger woman I meet at my local CrossFit gym a few months ago. After getting into a several friendly conversations with her I one day asked her to get breakfast.

She smiled at me and said “thank you but I have a bf”. I responded that I respected that and I wouldn’t ask again (while smiling). I believed her at the time and appreciated her handling it the best way possible. She was polite but direct. I didn’t pick up on any negative body language.

Since then I’ve ran into her several other times in class (including a small class with just her, me and the instructor). I act courteous. I’ll give a quick hello and goodbye after class. I even occasionally help her rack heavy weights and move machines (I help other people w/ this too sometimes).

However I don’t start conversations with her anymore. I don’t want her thinking I’m okay with a friendzone or stroke her ego too much by giving her additional attention. However I do act polite to her because she was respectful by how she rejected me

But she’s the chatty type and I’ve overheard her get into long conversations about what she is doing in grad school, her vacations with her friends and her weekend plans with other people. Not once has she ever mentioned her boyfriend. Never. I am starting to wonder she gave me a well intentioned lie.

That doesn’t mean I’ll keep trying if she’s single. She’s obviously not interested in me that way and that’s okay. We both know where each other stands.

But I just wonder why she lied to me about having a boyfriend.

So a number of women here said on my other question here: (https://www.girlsaskguys.com/dating/q4852214-how-would-you-feel-if-you-somehow-learned-that-you-were-the-5th) they would feel bad being the 5th choice by a guy who asks out but gets rejected by four other women...

so my question is how soon do you think someone should wait before getting back out there and trying again? Guys go through rejections all the time... and it is very much a numbers game of sorts really. the more you ask out you are likely to get at at least one yes at some point. But i guess some people don't like this? So in that case what would make you feel less like you were just another option somewhere down the line and more of the person they really want to be with? Does that mean you should wait a little bit after asking someone out and getting rejected?

or maybe we should just not mention how many we ask out before dating you? and we just kinda remain blissfully unaware of that?

I came so close to being a girl's first love and first everything.

Back in 2020, I was in a coding forum and met this devout Catholic girl who was homeschooled. She was 17 at the time, almost 18. I remember the very first conversation we had till this day. We really hit it off.

She later disclosed she never had a boyfriend or a first love. She had a crush on a guy but she was never close to him. In fact, she never had a male friend before she met me.

We talked every day and formed an online thing. I remember us talking about getting married at one point, where we would go on our honeymoon, and how we would name our kids. I was anticipating on marrying her.

A week after her 18th birthday, I went to go see her. She rejected me upon meeting in person. I was crushed beyond words.

Fast forwarding, she recently married this guy a few months ago who got to be her first everything. I still have nightmares about it. I had to be hospitalized because it was so traumatizing to me.

My biggest fear is not being able to find another woman like Rachel was when we first met. I fear that I will not find another girl that has never had her first love.